I'm 20 and have never dated. I dont have many male friends either. I dont go out much. I worry I'm a freak. I dont think I'm very impressive or people like me much. What should I do to feel comfortable and be normal?
2007-12-18 05:08:49 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health
are you in college there are many clubs/org you should join
2007-12-18 05:11:49 · answer #1 · answered by youngj042004 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Stop thinking that you are not impressive, always remember that you are somebody.
Whenever any opportunities or chances of happiness occur, don't say no, say YES! You never know where a particular action will take you.
For example a person lost their cell phone, they went on a quest to get it back and he ended up finding the love of his life.
Another example is someone decided to eat at an Indian takeaway and he got a free can of Coke.
Random actions can occasionally lead to unexpected conclusions.
Don't think that you are a freak because then you might start believing it. This is a result of the modern world we live in. Try to infuse some spiritual relaxation into your life. Imagine you're on a tropical island or a place so distant from the modern world.
If you think somebody hates you, try to think that particular person has no opinion about you.
2007-12-18 07:39:50 · answer #2 · answered by Sakib 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1: Being serious...Is it possible you are gay? Those symptoms sound like people I know that were gay but didn't want to come out. If you think you are don't be afraid to come out. This day and age you don't have much to worry about. You will feel better if this is the case.
2. Depression...can be fixed with doctors help
3. You might just have anxiety. Again doctors can help
4. A.D.D. causes some of these outcomes. Doctor can help.
5. If none of these, try membership at a gym or an activity that is physical. It will help your self esteem and you might meet someone while you are doing it!!!
Go to a free clinic if you have to.
Hope this helps!!!
2007-12-18 05:15:52 · answer #3 · answered by brettehibl 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Don't worry, I am 27 years old and I used to think that by age 18-19 then I should be a full adult.
You have a good situation, you are where you should be.
I had a girl friend when I was 16-17 and I ended up depressed and with genital warts. Then I had a girlfriend from 20-22 and I got more depressed. Flash forward a few years and now I have had to overcome a drinking problem and 10K in useless Credit card debt.
I wish I could go back to your situation and take it easy, but I thought I had to rush everything.
2007-12-18 05:13:36 · answer #4 · answered by Legend L 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
First you need to stop psyching yourself out before you never leave the house. You're 20 years old and have so much to see. Take classes on dancing, hiking, dog training, sports, travel, fitness, or whatever else crosses your mind. Not only will you have more to talk about but you'll meet people with the same interests.
You have one life to live!! DO IT! Everything else will fall into place.
2007-12-18 05:14:57 · answer #5 · answered by Char 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I had the same problem & what I did is this:
1. go out anywhere where there is people(ALONE)
2. talk to your self in the mirror and study your facial expressions
3. join a group of any kind anything at all you like
4. talk to strangers, even if they don't all respond to you, (someone will) people are friendly like grocery store clerks, bank tellers, retail employees anybody really
5. find things that are going on in your city and go to them.
The point to this is to socialize yourself, it is going to be weird and a Lil hard at first, but I promise you it will help, because it helped me. People will not come to you, you must go to the people.
I hope this helps you. I understand and fell what you are going through.
Good Luck p.s. maybe read about social anxiety and how to over come it.
2007-12-18 05:28:56 · answer #6 · answered by laura seeks the Kwisatz Haderach 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start doing daily affirmations.
Do things and/or buy things to spice up your appearance and maintain the grooming changes you have made (ie., plucked eyebrows, waxing, and hair color)
Step outside your comfort zone and start talking to people. Meet new people in places where you would share a common interest.
Have the ability to laugh at yourself. Don't dwell on mistakes you've made or any insecurities you might have and take pride in your accomplishments.
Only when you step outside your comfort zone do you ever grow as a person.
2007-12-18 05:17:21 · answer #7 · answered by Jenna J 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
An easy way to develop friends is to find an activity you like other than video games.
motorcycles, rock climbing, muscle cars, drag cars, bicycles, etc. Then find other people that like the same thing. usually there is a club or local events.
Motorcycle clubs are a great way to meet people....if you have a motorcycle. it will get you out of the house and you can make some good friends.
2007-12-18 05:13:14 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Feel normal and confident! Unfortunately, people notice right away whether someone is confident or not, and they often treat you with less respect than they would have otherwise.
Get out there, be confident, and think to yourself 'I have just as much right as anyone else here to have respect.'
Be yourself; I know its a cliche statement, but it couldn't be closer to the truth. Remember that if you are yourself, then you will attract people that you will genuinely like, and them likewise. If people dont like you for who you are, hey, they weren't worth it anyway.
If you think positive, people will like your company (they don't like someone miserable who sulks) then you will be impressive, and great company.
The only way to make friends is to get out there, start off by going out with a close male friend, and hopefully that will help you widen your circle of friends.
Bigger circle of friends, more chance of finding that lady that's just right for you!
PS: Learn to love yourself before you love others.
2007-12-18 05:16:27 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
When I was your age, I was so shy, I wouldnt even go for a cup of coffee on my own. I started practicing going places on my own and talking to strangers. It was tough at first, but eventually, I got used to it. I also joined Toastmasters International, and organization that teaches public speaking and leadership skills. It has helped me a lot to build my confidence. Find a club in your area and visit them. Good Luck.
2007-12-18 05:15:17 · answer #10 · answered by petra 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to the bars. Great way to see who you really are and if you mess up, go to another bar! After that meet people at weddings, Sports events, maybe a nieces dance recital. There is always a mister or misses right out there. Good luck!
2007-12-18 05:12:57 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋