Women (or men too I guess.) ... what do you do to get men to stop hitting on you all the time?

Question

Everywhere I go i get hit on. Some people like it, because it boosts their confidence or whatever... but I don't! I's obnoxious!
I hate it when I am out with my friends or family, and some old geezer comes up and asks for my number, or if I plan on being in playboy.

And don't give me that 'stop asking for it' speech, because I really don't. Today for example, I am terribly sick with laryngitis... but my dog was out of food. So I go to the store in a pair of soffes and a baggy t-shirt, with my hair up, and no make-up. Yet I got hit on THREE times.

What is it? Guys, why do you do this?! And girls... What do YOU do about this? Come on, I know I am no the only one!

I don't dress like a skank or a slut. I could go out in full robe and it would still happen.

My shorts were not short, and it doesn't matter that it is december... I live in florida.

Answer 1

I too in my younger days had this problem. It totally annoyed me, and often embarrassed me! I did not dress like a whore or even slightly revealing, always remembered to wear a "good" bra. If you purchase the type that does not show your nipples it helps. I had my Mothers wedding band (you can buy a gold band at walmart for $30) that I would wear often to keep the decent ones off and the ones who still hit on a married women I simply told I was married and acted appalled. There is nothing wrong with being pretty, and you should be proud of it. The problem lays within society and the gull of some me thinking just because they have a donger we want to see it! As you get older (I am 36 almost 37)it improves, still happens but not DAILY!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 2

The gift horse has been looked in the mouth. I can understand your frustration. It is terrible to be attractive.
You get hit on because men are required to initiate contact. When you are attractive, you appeal to more people. That means more of them are willing to take the chance at being rejected.
The fact is more women appreciate being hit on and flirted with than don't. It is unfortunate that you fit into the don't category because other than letting your appearance go to crap, there isn't much you are going to do to stop it.
You might find it useful to view the flirting and being hit on from a different perspective. Ask yourself questions about the guys approaching you. Did he stand there building up the courage to approach you or is he a player and you are his next target? Did his mouth go dry and heart start racing as he walked up to you? Did he have something in mind to say before he walked up or is he playing it by ear. The idea is, it doesn’t help you at all to get frustrated with the way things work. So don’t try to change it, just work within it.

Answer 3

Ok, first, I have to ask the obvious here. Do you have large breasts? If so, then that is one possible reason. The other is how you usually dress. Even with a t-shirt, large breasts can show. Hopefully you wear a supportive bra.

You cannot hide your figure too much, but you can make sure that you dress in a way that does not accentuate your curves. Nothing formfitting, cut low, too short, etc.

Take a good look at your wardrobe. I know it isn't fair that these creeps are hitting on you, perhaps you need to have a good line to tell them.

I would wonder why they think you'd be interested in them anyway. How about; laughing and saying "why do you think I'd be interested in you"? or "how dare you disrespect me by asking that" when they ask about Playboy.

Answer 4

Give us a break. Do you know how many millions of women out there would KILL to get 1/8 of the attention you get? Be thankful you were blessed with good genes. Next time you're out, try looking at a few of the "less attractive" women out there and imagine being in their shoes. Never being looked at. Never being smiled at. Never getting flowers or gifts from a man. Imagine how lonely it might be for them. My advice to you is be patient. Every year that goes by means another wrinkle around your eyes. Every year means another crease around your mouth. Every year your skin will be less supple. Eventually there will come a time when you look back and think "Gosh, i remember when I used to get hit on all the time." Why don't you go live in a cave. I'm sure no guy will bother you there.

Answer 5

Wow, you must be unbelievably attractive then. I had a female friend who suffered the same burden. Just like you, she too disliked the constant attention. Most girls would kill for such attention, but then again, too much of anything isn't good. I'm sure it gets annoying and unfortunately it cannot be turned off as easy as a light switch. My suggestion is to either politely tell them you have a boyfriend. Or for a little more fun (and to avoid the conversation all together) wear a ring on your fourth finger lol.

Answer 6

You could start wearing a wedding type band on your ring finger. Unfortunately, this won't stop all of them - many of them aren't observant enough to notice, and some of them frankly don't care if you're married. Not all guys do this. Unfortunately the guys who do, do it all the time. I'm sure you passed at least 10 guys in the store and only 3 of them hit on you. You are being harrased by a very vocal minority.

Answer 7

Be flattered I can go out well dolled up and still not be hit on ! Maybe try wearing a fake wedding ring - this wont stop all guys but it's enough to put some off. Either that or do your make up really badly and very exaggerated to try and put em off - come across as a freak ! Wear garlic round your neck....

Shaving your head would probably work but it's pretty extreme !

Answer 8

If u never got hit on then u would probably be here annoyed asking whats wrong with u... Grass always looks greener on the other side. Well maybe u need to look mean, have a stuck up face then u won't be approachable. Thats what i do, if i look mean people leave u alone regardless of how attractive u are. Maybe u look too nice and approachable.

Answer 9

Stop showering? Wear a Burka? Have a REALY mean looking guy's photo on your shirt?

Okay, on a more cereal note.

Some girls ask for it and some girls do not.
Some girls get hit on and some girls don't.

Is there a connection between those two statements? Perhaps, I would say that unless you are in a bar with drunks horny men, most men will only seriously hit on or flirt with ladies who they think might be in their league OR a girl they think is flirting with them. (where is he going with this, I know.. Bare with me for a second : ) so, to be hit on under normal circumstances, you must either

A. Dress, act or appear in a manner in which the person who is flirting with you thinks he has a chance

B. Appear to be flirty or easy, somehow showing the man that he may have a chance.

A. Be in a place where inhibitions are let down.

So, my guess is that even when you are sick, wearing baggy clothes and no makeup and feeling ugly, most men probably think you are still hot. The fact that you are NOT dressed to the tops makes those guys think they have an even better chance with you. So even dressed in lounge you will get hit on, just by different types of guys.

It is funny, think of how many people, male and female would love to experience the thrill of being hit on (by a sober person) even once in their lives and never will be.

Here is another thought, ARE YOU SURE you are being "hit on"? I say things to my waitress's and nurses and other females that many of my girlfriends have misconstrued as "hitting" like "wow, I love those shoes" or "are those earrings antique?" most people would think I was hitting, but I am not, I have a retrovogue store and I notice things like that is all. Maybe these guys are just being friendly sometimes and not ALWAYS hitting on you?

To answer your question, I would suggest you do the following:

Turn off the signals, do not inadvertently make yourself look available, do not smile at strange men, do not make eye contact with them, don't flip your hair or play with it while glancing at them, do not do anything to make them think you are interested.... OR, and this may be easier, when they DO flirt with you, take it as a compliment or take it as a statement that men are pigs or just forget it completely and be happy they are not making fun of you because you are overweight or too short or have lost your hair or have to wear welfare glasses or something. Enjoy it now and when you are 75 you will have something nice to remember.

The grass is always greener right?

Answer 10

You can't stop it. If you get hit on so often then you must be attractive. I accept who I am, I'm thankful for the reminders that I am a good catch (although, I must admit it is a bit annoying when it happens all the time), and I move on. You just learn to ignore it and keep walking. Don't let it get to you.