There was a construction worker who was working on a building when he fell 15 stories to his bloody death.
He arrived at the pearly gates and St. Peter said "Oh, I am sorry, my son. But you have been sentenced to hell." The worker agreed -- not like he could do anything else -- and he was on his way.
When he arrived, the devil looked at him and said, "Ah! A new slave. We shall burn you and throw you in the fiery pits."
Then the worker replied, "What wall could use a bit of patching. I could fix it first and you could throw me in the pit afterward." So he fixed the wall.
Satan, intrigued, asked, "What else can you build?" So the construction worker went about his job and made many improvements; in fact, by the time he was done, hell was a paradise. It had air conditioning, pools, balconies, you name it.
Within a few days, God phoned Satan and said, "I think there has been a mix-up. That worker was originally supposed to come to heaven."
Satan replied, "No way -- he's built all sorts of useful stuff for us. We're keeping him."
God then said, "Oh, yeah? Well, I'll see you in court. We're going to sue you for this man's soul and damages."
Satan just laughed: "And where are you going to find a lawyer?"
2007-12-18 01:36:41 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Hey, "Man Alive!" -- lighten up. I didn't see the joke as a slap at eternal damnation -- I saw it as a slap at attorneys (& they're begging to be joked about). I'm a serious Christian myself, & I wasn't offended -- actually, I was amused! Furthermore, I give it a star. Nyah, nyah, nyah, nyah, nyah!
2007-12-20 00:49:56 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
NOT funny at all!!! There are certain things you just DO NOT joke about, and ETERNAL DAMNATION is one of them!
Whether intentional or not, what you are guilty of here is blasphemy, and if I was you, I'd REPENT AND CRY OUT TO THE REAL GOD FOR MERCY! "God is not mocked", as the apostle Paul says (Galatians 6:7). Hell is a very REAL place where all those who die in their sins end up, having never trusted in Jesus Christ to save them! That is NO JOKE! But it is obvious you do NOT take that seriously! Be forwarned: you WILL stand before the Lord to give an account, and God's word CLEARLY declares: "Fools make a mock at sin" (Proverbs 14:9)
You may think that I'm being "too extreme" and that I need to "lighten up", but the judgment of God on the wicked is NO LAUGHING MATTER! And the fact is that, contrary to your so called "humor", the Bible portraits Hell as a place of TORMENT that the Devil has NOTHING to do with! Satan isn't even there! Hell is the JUST JUDGMENT OF GOD on sinners! It is GOD'S WRATH, not some place where Satan "hangs out" wating to torment the damned! Hell is GOD'S domain! HE created it, but Jesus said that He prepared it "for the devil and his angels" (Matthew 25:41). He NEVER intended for men to end up there! He loves us all, and that is why JESUS came into this world, to live a perfect life and die a perfect death so as to pay for ALL the sins of ALL men! What is necessary on OUR part of FAITH IN CHRIST! And if we are TRUE "believers" in Jesus, we will NOT make fun of what HE says is DEAD SERIOUS! Because those who are "saved" ("born again" as Jesus called it- John 3:3-6) know that GOD IS HOLY, and therefore He is to be GREATLY FEARED, not "toyed with" and made out to be some "stooge" in sinful "jokes"!
PLEASE! Take this SERIOUSLY! As I've said, one day YOU will die, and then YOU will be somewhere: Heaven or Hell! THE CHOICE IS YOURS, and I pray that you would know the joy of having God's marvellous "Christmas Gift" PERSONALLY: Salvation through Jesus Christ! MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!
2007-12-18 15:56:43 · answer #2 · answered by Man Alive! 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Funny! 100!
2016-04-10 05:48:54 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wooohahahahaha!!!
2007-12-18 02:11:00 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hahahaha! heard this before somewhere but it's still as good the second time round as the first!
2007-12-18 01:41:17 · answer #5 · answered by ♥ Dal Mad! ♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bash* them lawyers..lol
2007-12-20 15:39:21 · answer #6 · answered by Me 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
LOL that was really unexpected. i have never heard this joke before, star for you!
2007-12-18 02:22:18 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT!!! OMG, IT'S SOOOO...TRUE..kinda' like finding an honest politician, huh? happy day:)
2007-12-18 02:11:41 · answer #8 · answered by siobhansofie 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
ROFLMAO!! Lawyers always have to take the heat!!
2007-12-18 17:14:36 · answer #9 · answered by Ginny 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
haha...hav a star
2007-12-18 01:42:29 · answer #10 · answered by GoodGirlGoneBad 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋