What's the best way to give up trying to be with a girl?

Question

I've developed a personality disorder that won't allow girls to like me anymore. They are driven away by my personality and other problems that have come up over time. I'm not interested in fixing my personalty anymore since I've wasted over half my life trying to do so with no results. Now that I've gotten over the drug addiction that I acquired from years of psychologist drugging me up, I've learned to live without most things. I've gotten over needing a family or religion. I've gotten over needing most material things. Now I just need to get over wanting a girlfriend and my track to happiness will be complete. How can I achieve this? How can I shed the shackles of needing a mate?

Answer 1

I personaly think that you are looking forward to alot of unhappiness rather than finding happiness. No you can't change you personality but you could start annalilizing what kind of person would be able to deal with your problems and start looking for her. Drugs may have had alot to do with your failed past relationships and now with out them you could find a way to make things works. I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 2

Your problems are very complex and not just about not needing a mate. It is NOT normal to completely disengage yourself from society and very unhealthy. I think you need to be back on some type of meds, as you are on a path to destruction. You don't need to shed the shackles of anything or anyone, you have already shackled yourself. You sound like you have major depression and you haven't develop a personality that won't allow girls to like you. You have a personality through your depression, that won't allow you live life at all. You are living in a big void. Living without material things is never as serious as living without the human touch. You can not thrive without it. Go back to the psychologist because you need much more help. You don't have to take a bunch of pills, but you do need an antidepressant that isn't addictive. Without sincerely working on yourself with a good therapist, I don't know how you will survive life. It will take time and if you are honest and work hard enough.........these thoughts will someday be just a bad memory.

Answer 3

I'M very happy for you about getting over the addiction!!!!!!!!
Yeah that's the way to go but Please don't cop out just yet. Now you're on the road to happiness.... First get back with some family met some friends. Let family see the new and improved you "HEY you beat the monster down!!!! let others in your life Grab life hold on to it you proved to be cool. tough. you've shown yourself Love by beating the addiction Don't stop now! you want a girlfriend don't stop wanting that. Don't stop wanting stuff a nice place to live a show place!!!!!! Take pride, you are truly a great person! do extra work make more money the world tried to hurt you now Love again don't hurt anyone or anything back Get out there man show em what your made of Send card and letters out visit some family Don't give up on anything Relationships are very cool.
Kick some butt the right way If you've been in trouble with the Law don't worry about that either If you barrowed money from family start paying it back and the same with friends.
Make a total come back I know you can do it after that go get that girlfriend!!!!!!!!!

Answer 4

Obviously you have gone through many tribulations and trial in life and luckily you were bale to get out from those diffuculties and nice to see you here and I feel I am talking to a real matured man now........Unfortunately wanting a woman now by your side, you still need to strengthen yourself , your life..remember if you want to establish a future with a woman of your dream then do something about your lifestyle, you still need innovations..still it covers your attitude about life and people..I dont think you can ever move on if you dont try harder ....this timeyou still have to better your outlook in life,you said you have gotten over wanting needing a family, but you like it or not you still have them..do some real and serious self-assessment..I believe with what happend to you in the pacst those shackles are broken down already bec now you are facing a different level in life..the only way to true happiness is to forgive yourself, and others who caused you troubles and accept the fact that they were part of your past...I am sure there is a woman for you out there......wanting you too, needing you too, so dont despair and who knows she is just around the corner watching over you all these years......... the woman you ahve been waiting all your life who will accept you for what you are and who you are and help you build a very good life and remove all those bondages in your life....hold on and just continue innovating yourself and leave the past.......I know you are a very strong person after all you have themotivation and the driving force to truly happy now..so let that be your aim not to quit in pursuing this love of your life......good luck!!

Answer 5

Maybe you need to be alone for a while. Since you have "embraced" who you are, you should fine tune it.

I know it sounds cliche, but you will meet someone when you are not looking. The more you look, the more you will get down on yourself and lack self confidence - girls do not like this in a man.

Try finding a new hobby - like kayaking or hiking or a cooking class. I dont know where you live, but most areas have adult night interest classes for short money.

Explore something that will keep your time occupied, and maybe join a group to meet new people. The best relationships are those based on a solid foundation of friendship and you never know who you may meet in a group activity.

Also, when you meet that person, they will accept your personality for who you are - but you have to truly love yourself first. That is what a relationship is.

Keep your head up and work on yourself first. Congratulations on beating your drug addiction - if you can do that, you can do anything.

Good luck! :)

Answer 6

You don't need family (I don't either - better off without mine, I think this may depend on the family you were dealt); you don't need religion; you don't need material things (I hope this doesn't include food and clothing and shelter) but you need a girlfriend.
This just says you need someone to care for and to care for you. When we "need" a mate we are in danger of choosing a mate, any mate, first available.
Try to concentrate of making friends, on being a friend and things will work out. Do some good things for others and good will come back to you. It may not happen within the time span you prefer though.
Good luck to you.

Answer 7

The very same way you got rid of the desire to have a family, a religion, or most material things, of course.

But you know what happens. As soon as you stop wanting a girl, there one will be. Hopefully she will be able to deal with whatever you feel is wrong with your personality. What IS wrong with your personality anyway? Do you have Borderline or what?

Answer 8

If only we could do without the desires that all humans have! Would you really feel alive without the desire to feel loved or liked?? Maybe your trying to hard or looking in all the wrong places. Could be that your wasting time dwelling on all this. You could try to step back and just enjoy life without thinking about all that you mentioned. If you do I think in time all the things that you mentioned will fall into place. If your in therapy do you tell your therapist these feelings that you have?

Answer 9

You don't sound very happy. No, you don't need material things or religion to be happy but family & someone to share your life with are certainly up there. Why not stick with psychotherapy/medication, maybe find a new Dr. if you don't like yours?

Answer 10

just keep telling urself that you dont need but i personnally think u are trying to do something very folish and it will never work out for u in the end because all men desire women and i think to stay healthy all people need to have a women family and place to go cool off by praying to something or someone