Would you date and maybe marry a non-vegetarian if you are vegetarian for ethical reasons?

Question

I don't know!!! (to your answers)
It's true.. I agree that it's wrong and that in a way, he's committing a crime to me- murder. But then again my dad is not vegetarian and I still love him.

Yes I am in a serious relationship with someone who is not vegetarian.

What's the way to find out? Dump him?

I'm also pretty specific about guys because of my cultural background, and he fits that. And he's a great guy for me except for the fact that he eats meat.

Answer 1

I would. If i really loved the person that much i'd realize that those are my ethical beliefs not his. I would never want to shove my beliefs down another person's throat. But if we ever went out to dinner and he chose a meat entree i'd want him to brush his teeth before he kissed me

Answer 2

I couldn't do it. I think the most important point you brought up is "ethical reasons". Many vegetarian/omnivore couples work out fine, particularly if the vegetarian is a health-vegetarian. But when ethics come into play, it's a whole different story.

I couldn't be with (and give respect to) someone who I felt was doing something morally wrong several times a day- it'd just be too much of a disparity between my beliefs and his.

That doesn't mean it can't work- often it does, but my personal choice would be no.

That said, I don't have very many vegetarian/vegan friends, and most of my family is not vegetarian... and of course it doesn't prevent me from loving them. But there IS a difference between the bond between family and friends, and an intimate bond with your partner for life, so you have to make decisions accordingly.

I wonder if maybe you are thinking about being with someone who is not veg? If thinking long and hard about it doesn't give you the answer you are looking for- there is only one way to find out!

:-)

Answer 3

Honestly, I don't know. As a vegetarian, I've given a lot of thought to this issue and I have not arrived at a conclusion. I would like to meet my perfect vegetarian dream girl and live happily ever after but real life rarely ever pans out that way. Much as I hate to say this, I'm willing to settle for less rather than live a life of loneliness.

Although I wouldn't force her to, I would definitely encourage her to 'convert'. But it would not be a demand or ultimatum type thing; just a request.

Now, I would like to add an observation which may get me thumbed down but I don't care. I find that veggie women/omni men couples are more common than the reverse. This is not because there are fewer vegetarian men, but because women (not just vegetarian women) in general start out with the notion that they can 'convert' their partner to anything. This never works in 99% of cases. Whether it's diet, religion or crime, women will never be able to change a man. Either you accept a man as he is, or you find a different man whom you can get along with from the start.

Hey Gardeniagreen,

Could you waitlist me?

Answer 4

I'm a vegan and my husband is an omnivore. He sees a lot of sense in my vegan lifestyle but despite knowing the ethical concerns and the health benefits, he remains an omnivore. He's at the point right now where fast food disgusts him and he's cut down on meat and dairy intake but he does not want to eliminate meat from his diet.

My husband is very accepting, however. I purchase only vegan food unless he specifies that he wants "real" mayonnaise or he wants some canned tuna or some steak. I will then purchase it for him. It's rare to never that he asks me to buy something non-vegan; I have only cooked him a non-vegan meal once this past year (he had a severe flu and his only request was chicken soup, which I made him because I love him and will do what he wishes). I have a section of the freezer that is just for him. He makes and cleans up after himself.

He eats an 85% vegan diet anyway. I love him and just like he won't judge me, I won't judge him.

Answer 5

After I became vegetarian, I was certain that I wanted to marry a vegetarian. I dated a few girls who weren't, but that wasn't anything serious. Now I am married to vegetarian lady. I can't imagine having it any other way. My wife's two brothers and sisters all married people who eat meat. One brother got divorced (after 25 years), and the other marriages seem to be going pretty well. It would be difficult for me to handle; I don't like the smell of meat cooking and things like that.

Answer 6

Fortunately, when I decided to go vegan, my fiance also decided to go ovo-lacto vegetarian (without any coersion from me, I might add). It has made things so much easier. It would have been an issue for sure if he had not made the decision he did.

If I should be on the market again for whatever reason, which I highly doubt, I would specifically seek out a veg*n man. I like to think my domestic skills are part of my charm -- I cook, clean, bake and sew and am not half bad at any of them. But my cooking does not contain meat, simple as that.

Answer 7

For probably the most section i'd restrict such relationships but while cupid has a strange humorousness. If it was real love sure why now not, or of path i might. However on the other hand most relationships that work are just that, work in which both persons work with what they must make a practical relationship. It of path helps to have identical values. The more you care a couple of detailed issue the less complicated or hardier it will be for you to determine and eventually get along with one other. Briefly it is a possibility but much less of a robust probability.

Answer 8

i was with a non-vegetarian for almost a year. what broke us up had nothing to do with his eating habits.

i knew going into the relationship that he wasn't a vegetarian, nor did he have any intention of changing his ways. i did notice that he indulged me in my "crazy food whims" when we were together and toward the end his meat intake was far less than it was when we started dating. he also became my biggest fan and would hand out my PETA literature and stickers to all of his friends and customers at his work. he knew how much it meant to me; therefore, it grew to have meaning for him as well.

i think if you genuinely care for this person, you should be willing to accept his differences. this is really a minor thing when you think about it. unless he's a diehard sport hunter and you're a devout vegan, this isn't an insurmountable circumstance.

a little random from a messageboard at peta2.com:

CaiCee posted at peta2.com:

I thought i found a guy for me...
HE WON'T DATE ME UNLESS I EAT MEAT.
I told him to take a hike.
He told me he could find another girl. He says there are other fish in the sea.
I yelled back at him.. "THERE WON'T BE OTHER FISH IN THE SEA IF YOU KEEP EATING THEM!!"

Answer 9

I couldn't do it. I'm really glad my husband went vegetarian with me because I don't know how I could have handled it.

I think respect is very important and I would lose a lot of respect for someone close to me who continued to eat meat after I sat down with them and explained all the things I learned. If they just blew me off and didn't do their own research and see how WRONG it is to keep eating animal products then our values would be so different from each other that I don't think we'd be meant to be lifelong partners. I would just constantly be disgusted with him and I can't imagine that'd be healthy for a relationship. I love my husband because he's so smart and if he knew all the things I know and still chose to contribute to mass animal suffering and really poor health I just wouldn't find him so smart anymore. I would still love him, but I wouldn't respect him nearly as much and I think that would eventually kill the relationship.

I definitely wouldn't have children now with someone who insisted they be raised as meat-eaters.

Other people CAN make a relationship work as a veg/omni couple. I just couldn't do it. I couldn't be with a religious person either.

Answer 10

Sure, just because one eats meat and the other doesn't won't make a difference to me. As long as you both understand each others needs then there should be no problem. Of course your three meals a day would have to be made separately. But, all that matters is that you love each other and would do anything to please each other, that counts.

But, obviously if you are having a hard time finding this person then maybe you should marry a vegan.