Is He cheating on me? or is it he just wants to cheat?

Question

My boyfriend has been acting differently over the past month. He's obsessed with the show the pickup artist on vh1 and even has downloaded cds on how to pickup women. when i asked why he would want to know that when he has me, he responded by saying it was to become more social and popular. He had been texting one of my friends which is a girl. He gets mad if i read his text messages and even ripped the cell phone out of my hands and deleted his messages before i could read them. finally he's never liked myspace but he recently got one. He asked me if he could add his ex and i said fine because i didnt want to be one of "those" type girls. I dont think he is cheating yet but it does make me mad hes doing all this stuff, it seems as though he is wanting to cheat or find someone else. am i crazy for being nervous about this?

Answer 1

OK, now that I have read this question, I will add to my other response. See your other question. lol

Let's give bf the benefit of the doubt and assume he ISN'T cheating on you. Let's go even further to say that he ISN'T even INTENDING on it. (Probably both big stretches, but let's be adventurous here.)

At best, he is indulging curiosities that have no place while he is with you. He isn't exactly reading self-help books on dinner party small talk. He is looking at PICK UP info. Exactly what does he intend to get out of this while he is WITH YOU? "More popular?" With WHOM? (I think we know...women.) And if so, WHY does he need that? An ego boost? AND, If he is that needy for attn, esp. THAT kind, that's ...worrisome, to say the least.

What happens when he GETS that attn? (Not to mention, once again, that isn't fair to you.) Again, at best, he is seeking a thrill that is disrespectful to you and your relationship with him. At worst (and probably more likely), he will be at the very least, putting himself in temptation's way. And often, guys who are that needy for validation have a rather difficult time/low desire to resist. So, even if he had NO INTENTIONS of cheating...he most likely will.

Again, it doesn't mean that every little ego boost one gets from the opposite sex means they will run off and cheat with that person. The red, flaming flags here is that he is ACTIVELY SEEKING the temptation, looking to IMPROVE his ability in getting it, and trying to CONCEAL the "results" (ie--his texts).

Honestly...you probably need to get out while you can without getting any more hurt. At best, this guy is MEGA immature and egotistically needy. At worst, he's up to WAY no good. At typical...he's putting himself in a place where no good is likely to happen...and where he doesn't belong while he's with you.

I wish you the best, and I am very sorry you are going through this.

Feel free to email me with any further questions.

Answer 2

Unbelievable. Girl you need to seriously get out of that relationship before you get hurt and trust me he will if he's already doing that sort of thing. Let him off because he obviously likes to have his cake and eat it. Im really sorry but I don't think you will find one girl who will disagree. Save yourself the heartache and humiliation.

Answer 3

He's your boyfriend - he's in a relationship. So what the hell is he doing learning pickup techniques? Obviously if he's learning them and liking them, he's attempting them.

Yes, he is cheating, or at least attempting to cheat on you. Dump him.

Answer 4

It definitely sounds like he is up to no good. Too many red flags there!!!

Answer 5

uhh if hes your boyfriend why would he want to do that? i cant say he is cheating, but he might if he hasnt yet. thats shady. i say dump him! good luck with that

Answer 6

dump his ***..you deserve better than that and it will just tear at your self esteem if that keeps happening..and it sounds to me that he i already cheating