Can any creationist prove to me they're more than 10 years old?

Question

I want undeniable proof!

Birth certificates/Passports/Drivers licences are the work of Cthuhlu!

Answer 1

There are no (absolute) proofs for, or against, the existence of God.

Proof is a tricky word. Many people think that proof establishes something is an absolute fact. That's not often the case; at least, not in the everyday world.

In jurisprudence and science, a reasonable basis for proof is based on solid evidence and the absence of any known contradiction. There's a "reasonable person" standard which defines proof as "beyond a reasonable doubt". The test of time fortifies proofs.

You say there are no unicorns? Prove it. You see? ABSOLUTE proof is an illusion -- especially when trying to prove a negative, such as "There is no God".

However, rephrasing the assertion from "There is no God", to "God is imaginary", makes proof easier, using the "reasonable person" standard. We can't ABSOLUTELY prove it but we can prove it beyond a reasonable doubt.

Consider this . . .

No matter where man has spread, he as created countless gods. From aboriginal Australians to tribal Africans to American Indians to ancient Egyptians . . . they've all created gods prolifically and with ease. That man creates gods is a well-known, indisputable fact.

But what about the opposite? God creating man? We DON'T know that he did. We have no evidence that he did. We have no reason to think that he did. All the evidence points to evolution over the course of billions of years. There's growing evidence that life originated from abiogenesis -- from an electro-chemical reaction in the primordial soup of early Earth.

So, with countless thousands of gods to man's credit, believers are in the untenable position of asserting that all the gods that came before and after theirs are false . . . but their own god (and religion) is real and true. Asserting that one's own god is real, when we know that man created all the others, is ridiculous. It is so unlikely that we can safely consider it delusional.

Man has created countless thousands of gods and YOURS (if you believe) has NO evidence. That, my friend, qualifies God’s existence as dubious, at best, and faith in him as misguided and misplaced. Based upon the preponderance of evidence, the assertion that "God is imaginary" meets the reasonable person standard for proof and has withstood the test of time for thousands of years.

Answer 2

I was born on a Wednesday, February 29th, 1968. My 11th birthday is coming up next year (2008), less than 3 months from now. That makes me over 10 years old.

In actuality, of course, I'm going to be 40 years old -- even though it will, technically, be my 11th actual birthday.

I can prove I'm 40 years old because I was conceived while my parents were high on LSD, dispensed to them by Timothy Leary. The LSD formula was improved the following year and the earlier formula faded from usage. This is important to my proof, because the earlier formula caused a very specific birth defect that only happens when both parents are tripping on that particular early LSD formula when they conceive their child.

So the birth defect is my proof -- I had to be conceived before 1970.

Because of the birth defect, in order to lead a normal life, I had to have penile reduction surgery -- which I wouldn't recommend to anybody; very painful.

I'm okay now and living a normal life and have 2 kids nearing college age. If you're a father, then you know having teenage kids is plenty of proof they you're older than 10.
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:-)
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Answer 3

Noah's ark ring a bell? If there was no Ark there would be no Bible. The dinos. that had been covered up because of the great deep being broken up because of God's fury on the evil that had come on the earth @ that time should be proof enough of God. When looking @ the great force that was inflicted on earth @ that time(is why we have asteroids come back to earth now from time to time) & such deep oceans & high mountain ranges oil from the force of water being all over the earth then would it not be true? Study to show ourselves uproved unto God a workman that needed not to be ashamed. Don't just ask ??? Maybe reading the Bible will help you to grow & get the info you need. God bless you.

Answer 4

Be careful of what you ask for!

The precursors to the Plymouth Brethren (IIRC) accommodate evolution with the following cute assertion. This world is a test. In fact the world was created only 6,000 years ago, but everything appears as though it were millions of years old. All the radio-dating gives the "correct" answers, but it is all a giant test of one's faith. A completely unassailable position, but then that is why it is completely useless. The inability to be falsified is crucial for being considered "true." Indeed, creationism is general suffers from this glaring problem: creationists cannot identify what circumstances would falsify their claims.

HTH

Charles

Answer 5

If I had Cthulhu verify that my birth certificate records the correct date, would that be proof? Or would I still have to get Ra to validate that I am not, in all actuality, a walking corpse? Should I get the FSM to prove that I have aged at a normal rate during that time period? And should I finally verify that, in fact, time actually flowed normally from that date to present by consulting Albert Einstein's ghost?

If so, I'm already half-way there...

Answer 6

I'd show you my birth certificate, but then I'd have to kill you.

EDIT: Ok, so you don't want to see a birth certificate. My dad shot a film of my mom giving me my first bath when I was about three days old. The film is dated. You could watch it to confirm my newborn status and view the date inscribed upon it, but I would still have to kill you afterward.

SECOND EDIT: (((CMW))) Happy Birthday!

Answer 7

Can any evolutionist prove to me , unquestionably that he/she evolved from an ape, and explain why present day apes are NOT still evolving into men ??

Answer 8

Nobody is older than five days.

God created the world last Thursday and gave us all a bunch of memories that suggest that we're older than that. He also included evidence to test our faith.

Answer 9

Remember folks, they could have fake IDs and been coached on past events. They may even have been surgically altered to appear post-puberty.

Answer 10

i have a birth certificate, license, college ID, social security number, police reports, etc....

But I'm not giving any of my information to you...(peter priesthood is my secret superhero identity...if anyone knew who I was, I would be dead!)