If you were a parent and your daughter came home pregnant?

Question

This is really a VERY serious question in order to possibly help some teens on here. I don't condone it but I personally , would put my daughter on birth control as my mother did for me. Girls ALWAYS say "I can't tell my parents because they'll kill me" or similar. NO ONE IS GOING TO KILL YOU OR HATE YOU. I'm a mom of a son and he and his fiance got pregnant young. BOTH though they were going to deal with HELL. Guess what?? Things happens (just don't do it on purpose please) but when things "happen" you "deal " with them. Both of the families came together for TOTAL support. The mom has stayed in school and working and my son is almost a corpsman now. My 13 month old grandson is AWESOME and very much loved (and SO are his parents). I hope adults answer on here. What would you do if you child (teenager 16+) came home and told you they were pregnant or got someone pregnant - or do you have a story relating to this?

No one is pregnant here now!!!!!!!! It's a question -------

Answer 1

I would cry with her and I would tell her that I love her. I would ask her how she feels about it and we would discuss her options. I would make it clear that she is going to have my love and support no matter what.

Answer 2

I got pregnant at 16 (almost 17) and my mother told me I had to marry the father of the baby. Well I did and it didnt last long. He was very abusive and I left him after 3 years. We have 2 daughters together and he has signed off his rights and has had nothing to do with them in 5 years. So if one of my daughters came home pregnant when she was still a teen(i and raising 4 girls) I would not be telling her she had to marry the boy that is for sure. I would be supportive.

Answer 3

I was 17 when I gave birth to my 1st child. My 1st ob/gyno appointment of my life was for a pregnancy test on my 16th birthday I was 2 months pregnant.
I was terrified to tell my mother but not because I thought she would kill me. I was so worried that I was disappointing her. But I told her well I was about to tell her and she said it for me. After that me and my mother got very close. She was my rock, my teacher, and my best friend. I owe her the world.

Do I want my teen or even young adult to get pregnant or get someone pregnant before they are ready both financially or emotionally no. But I will always be here for my children especially when they mess up that is when they need me the most!

I have to add the best thing my mother ever did for me was not taking over. She stepped aside, she was near if I needed something but she let me be Mom to my baby. Yes I grew up faster then I would have, but now I have a wonderful relationship with my soon to be 21 yrld son. It was difficult but I do not regret a thing.

Answer 4

My baby brother (10yr difference) at 18 got his 16 year old girlfriend pregnant. She didn't tell him until she was almost 4 months along and they didn't tell the families until she was 5 1/2 months along.
What did we do? We accepted it and moved on. We planned a baby shower. Got them enrolled in parenting classes. And gave them all the love and support we could. She finished high school and my brother finished up his mechanic's school. Next week my nephew will be two years old. I love him dearly. My brother is working full time as a mechanic and his girl friend is going to college for early childhood education. In two weeks they get the keys to their house!
They both grew up fast! My brother stepped up to the plate and was very patient will his girlfriend when she didn't know what to do with her life. College? Work? Stay with my brother?
I am very proud of both of them! It is still strange to see my baby brother with a baby. I remember him at that age and compare them all the time.
What would I do if I were the parent. First of all I would have a relationship with my child so that they knew I was there. Treat them like a human being, love them and teach them how to love. Second I would be able to talk to my children. I would talk openly about sex and pregnancy. Let them know they can come to me for anything. This isn't a perfect world even when you take precautions things happen. We will cope! It isn't the end of my world or theirs.
Talk to your parents! Don't be afraid! They too make mistakes. They love you unconditionally.

Answer 5

I am not a parent. I am a 25 year old woman with a 14 year old baby sister, who I love like my own. I have thought about this a lot, and my fiance and I have discussed it together. If my sister told me that she were pregnant, it wouldn't change they way I felt about her. I would first try to find out what she wanted to do. If she felt as though she were not ready, I would take the baby to raise as my own. I get so frustrated by parents and family members who make young pregnant mothers and fathers feel as though they should be ashamed, or won't help with the baby. So to answer your question, I would give her a hug and tell her that everything is going to be ok. Then I would go shopping for baby stuff.

Answer 6

I would be totally supportive! I came home pregnant at 16 and my parents weren't very supportive. They ignored everything until the day I had my son. Talk to your kids so they're not afraid to tell you if they're sexually active. If you have a son, give him condoms. If you have a daughter get her on birth control and give her condoms too. They're going to have sex no matter what you say. Talk to them let them know they CAN end up pregnant! Only sure way of not getting pregnant is NOT having sex. Teach them about STD's too.

Answer 7

No matter what, I would love my child and grandchild unconditionally. But 16 is old enough to work with parental consent. It really bothers me when I see 12-15 years olds having babies. Not every situation is like yours however. There are some parents that will throw their daughter or son out on the street. I do not agree with them however.

Answer 8

I have thought about that a lot because I have 2 daughters age 23 &19. My 19 year old came to me when she was 14 and said her boyfriends cousin gave him a condom so they tried it out. I was shocked. She never got pregnant though she was sexually active. Now she is married. If she would have gotten pregnant I would have supported her totally, what ever she decided to do. My kids know they can come to me for anything.

Answer 9

As a former teen mom, I can say that nothing is more important then gaining the support of your family. My parents were disappointed and angry at first, but they came around, gave me the support I needed with simple encouragement rather than critisism, and absolutely adore my children. I have to boys, and if they found themselves in that situation, I would be supportive, and explain consequences realistically, most importantly encourage them to take care of their responsibilities!! If I had a daughter in that situation I would certainly offer the same!

Answer 10

If i were in that situation... I would have a stern talk with my child, and i would do all I could to support the child, both mine and hers. I would NEVER condone abortion.. no one has the right to take an innocent life. I'm so very happy for you and the outcome. Sometimes what could be considered a "mistake" can be the best thing to happen to you and the best learning experience possible.

See, with abortion, the only thing thats taught is that you have an out for a "mistake", and you dont learn that there are consequences for your actions.

I myself was a product of a pregnancy outside of marriage. Good thing my parents did the right thing and got married, and I have 3 younger sisters. Our family is great and I love them all.

Answer 11

First of all if parents did their jobs and would quit letting their immature teenage children date like adults their daughters would not NEED birth control (which has a failure rate and is pointless after she is pregnant)and they would not be coming home pregnant.
Pregnancy doesnt just "happen".It takes 2, and if they are under the age of 18 then the parents were asleep at the wheel.
They would be MADE to take care of the kid.She would have very little to NO social life after it was born, SHE would learn to be a mother, HE would get a job and pay child support.
They would learn responsibility AND accountability is the price for sex.
I personally know a former pregnant teenage mother who is now in her late 30's who learned from her parents mistake of letting her date at that age.