You are attached. Some other guy asks you out so you decline him. However, you like the other guy but you will not two time. The other guy asks to remain friends.
What would you do? Would you remain friends knowing you like the other guy or would you cease all contact so not to get tempted?
Also, the fact that you like the other guy - does that suggest you are not entirely happy with your current partner?
2007-11-29 09:37:16 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
A) It is best not to remain friends. Keeping the friendship would be selfish reasons. Same as the spare tire rule. You have this friend just in case things don't work out. Someone to fall back on just in case.
B) Simple fact she is entertaining the thought may mean she is not completely happy at with her current beau. If she was completely happy, she would not think twice about keeping the guy as a friend.
A woman who is really into her guy would be concerned about her boyfriend's feelings and if he would become jealous of this new friend.
Both sexes always have concerns about a new friend, for they have every reason too.
2007-11-29 09:42:41 · answer #1 · answered by Sassy Shut Your Mouth 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The guy I'm attached to subscribes to the "Harry Met Sally" assumption about men and women, and that is that no man or woman wants a "friendship" with an attached person. He maintains that this is just a way to be on the fringe and ready to move in if and when she/he becomes unattached. I am not so jaded. I feel like you can never have too many friends and I don't think anyone's partner has the responsibility to be "all things" for you but that is no reflection on your happiness with them.
2007-11-29 09:45:09 · answer #2 · answered by *ifthatswhatyoureinto* 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would remain friends. Past experiences have taught me that you can never have too many friends, and it's not set in stone that she and the guy to whom she is attached will be together throughout eternity. I don't think it suggests that she is not entirely happy with her partner. If this other guy is ok with just being friends with her right now since she is in a relationship, I think it's fine as long as her current partner also knows and is ok with it. If she's not married, then why not? Nothing wrong with keeping your options open. Although...if she has romantic/sexual feelings for this other guy, then a platonic relationship is going to be hard to achieve. This is a tough one, but I still say ok to be friends as long as it's just friends.
2007-11-29 09:44:52 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Good adult questions. Seems you've got two choices for figuring this out. Solo - means u're alone with the questions.
Help - means you get with a best girl friend, sister, mom or somebody similar. You use the word "attached". Is that engaged, close to engaged, close to married, going steady or what. If it's not "or what" then you've made a commitment which has to be broken to let you legitimately date other men.
If this is the first time you've faced this question, you should spend an appropriate amount of effort coming to your answer. There will be other men who will be attracted to you whether you want it or not. Do a good job of deciding for your own sake because you'll have to live with it.
2007-11-29 09:48:53 · answer #4 · answered by bardmere 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
the other guy has declared his intentions regarding you, you can not be friends because that's not how he saw it. you are flattered but i think you should not be, if your not sure about the person your with whats the point. your in love until something better comes along?, is it like upgrading your phone. i am sorry if i seem harsh towards you buts that's what i get from what you have written, if you love whom your with then you can not be tempted, if you are, then why? we both know the reason, good luck i hope you accept my answer as im not an attached female, but i am a person interested in what happens to other people.
2007-11-29 10:28:51 · answer #5 · answered by andy F7 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Steve I would not tempt Providence. Better the bird in the hand than two in the bush!!! No I dont think it means that you are not entirely happy with your current partner.....sometimes we see things that we think we might like but realise what we have is a whole lot better. Dreams can be shattered in seconds!
2007-11-29 09:48:35 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You sound intelligent -- I totally understand your question. The thing is, it depends on how weak or strong you are (me -- weak) If I had strength, I think I'd back off because of the temptation because it could screw up a good thing.
People do get attracted to others even if married -- it's GOING to happen to proably everyone in one way or another. No, you are NOT a bad person.
2007-11-29 09:42:57 · answer #7 · answered by butterfliesRfree 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think remaining friends is a good idea; I've had this happen to me before. Remaining in contact with him will only heighten your feelings, especially if they are well-warranted. You'll find yourself enjoying him more and more... until you are very conflicted. Don't do that to yourself.
I don't think it necessarily means you're not happy with your partner; you're not blind or deaf. Certainly it's not uncommon to find people who have qualities that you are attracted to. How many people love funny men? And how many funny men are there? One? Completely normal, according to me.
2007-11-29 09:41:31 · answer #8 · answered by Sarah 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your young and bored in your current relationship, if you remain friends with the guy you like you are setting yourself up to cheat. And by "like" you mean physically attracted to. You like your bf, you lust the other guy
2007-11-29 09:45:27 · answer #9 · answered by Katie M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are attracted to this man it might be best to stay away.
Being attracted to another person does not necessarily mean you are not happy in your relationship, as we are all sexual beings.
It is the decisions you make that determine if you are happy or not.
2007-11-29 09:42:57 · answer #10 · answered by mystique 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋