Good advice for my son who says his gf doesn't spend enough time w/ him?

Question

She works, goes to college, volunteers w/ mentally ill children & teaches vocational bible school. He says she usually comes home & goes right to sleep. They have been dating for 1 1/2 years & are engaged, but they argue a lot about the amount of time they spend w/ eachother. Other than that they get along great. She is a sweetheart & I don't know what to tell him when he complains to me?

Answer 1

tell him to volunteer with her. when she comes home, have a nice candlelit dinner prepared. offer to take her and pick her up from work sometimes instead of letting her drive. if this is the only problem when they get married, this should change.

Answer 2

Have him sit down with her and set up a date night. That is a night that is just for them and no one else. He nor she can make any other plans for that night. They can do what ever they wish on that night. Going out to dinner or staying in for dinner and a movie are just a couple of ideas. The rules of this, though, is that for that night everyone else has to be told no. No school work, no volunteering, no regular work. This will give them a night to look forward to and know that nothing will take precedence to it. They can make it for as often as once a week to as little as once a month. It needs to be at least once a month though. I hope that this helps.

Answer 3

My opinion is she is doing too much and not investing enough of herself into the relationship. Working and going to college are things she needs to do but the other things she can let go of so she can spend more time with him. If she isnt willing to do that than she is putting him last. It sounds like she is purposely keeping herself busy to avoid relationship responsibilities and no way would I marry someone like her. They can find someone else to do the volunteer work and teach bible school. Its not a necessity for her.

Answer 4

i say that maybe this women needs to take breather! when are these classes and such. maybe a saturday then can head on out together. will she be keeping these jobs once married? if not, then maybe she should get a good job with the right times. if so, then i say that she needs to know how this is hurting her boyfriend. tell your son to consult her and tell her how he feels. maybe by letter, not in a word in case an argument happens.

Answer 5

don't just cause he's your son, don't be light on the female advice. He is going to push her away. She is doing things for her future and that means something to her. He needs to be patient and get involved with his own interests as well as take interest in hers.

Answer 6

Be honest, just cause he's your son, don't be light on the female advice. He is going to push her away. She is doing things for her future and that means something to her. He needs to be patient and get involved with his own interests as well as take interest in hers.

Answer 7

It sounds like this lady has made a career for herself and she is just fine with it........

so he needs to go find him something to do.. and make her miss him...
or she just isn't ready for marriage..

there are lots of things to get busy with.. she will want a man who is industrial.. and trying to get ahead.. she sounds like a cooperate woman..
so he needs to be very productive..
sorry.. but a woman or a man.. once they are on track,, will not allow anything to intervene..so he needs to go with the flow, not complain but find something to do..

Answer 8

Perhaps she doesn't have time in her life for a guy right now. Maybe it'd be best for them to split up and he can find someone else who does have time for him.

Answer 9

tell him that he should be proud that he has such a loving,good-hearted gf,who does such wonderful things!!and if he would stop being selfish,maybe he could volunteer and help the children with her!!

Answer 10

tell him to get a hobbie or try to volunteer with her or find someone else to keep him busy