How can I improve my relationship with my son?

Question

I have a 15year old son, who'd Dad left us many years ago. I'm afraid I'm not the best parent, as i am quick to yell and lose my temper with him quite often. I am trying to control this, but he seems kind of distant all of the time. He is always on his video game or phone. What can i do to improve our relationship and get closer to him?

Answer 1

Find things that he is interested in and try them with him. Since he plays video games, ask him if you can play a game with him.

Answer 2

I think that it is great that you are trying to do better. It sounds like there may have been some damage done and now you are going to have to do some repair work. The main thing is to show your son that you are really trying to be different and you want things to be better. Talk openly with him and apologize and let him know that you were wrong.

I think people tend to take their relationships with family for granted and don't work as hard at it as they do other relationships and things. You get out of it, what you put into it. I suggest a family night where you spend time together with no video games, no phone etc.., Watch movies, go out to dinner or take turns picking what the activity will be.

Kids can smell BS a mile off, so be real and be genuine. Show an interest in what he is doing, what matters to him and what he says.

Answer 3

I'm a single mom of a 15 yr old boy too. It's a stage he's going through. All boys this age do. I was told by a male friend that I shouldn't worry about it because all 15 and 16 year old boys don't talk to anyone but friends. Just let him know your there if he needs you and you need to understand that he's not 3 anymore. Let him expand his wings a little bit and you need to stop trying to get closer to him when all he wants to do is not appear to friends as a mama's boy.

Answer 4

Find something you both would be interested in,and do it together.Think about the types of video games he is playing.If he is into ones that use a lot of martial arts moves,maybe he would like to take a martial arts class.And there is no reason why dad cant take that class as well.Tony Hawk?Find a skate park.Hunting?Try a hunting trip.Madden's NFL?Easy,go to a football game together.There are too many opportunities that you can do together,even if you both don't understand the rules.The most fun my son has had with his step dad was going to his jr high football game this year.Even though they both understood the rules,they did something different.They gave weird names to the plays,and made up their own ideas of what the rules and penalties are.Well,it became conatagious,and by the end of the game,there was half a dozen of us doing it.The best part?They figured out how one another thought.

Answer 5

Tell him to turn the games off, we are leaving. Get out of the house, have dinner, go to the movies, or something he enjoys. And make it a point to talk and that we need to do this a least twice a month or more. Good Luck, hope this helps a little.

Answer 6

part of it is he's a teen, and they are inherently distant, its kind of like their job, lol. also, you could try takin him out to dinner once a week or something like that, just go somewhere where u 2 can be alone together for like an hour or so and just talk and see whats up in life. you dont need to win the best parent of the year award...besides, in 3 years he'll be in college.

Answer 7

Have a Son-Mom day! I have three sons and I always make a day for one of them and me, we do something fun that we both enjoy and talk on our way there, don't give up, keep trying, because even when he seems uninterested he is actually thrilled you want to spend time with him.

Answer 8

I am 24 yrs old and was very distant with my parents growing up. Just from that I have some suggestions- (a) Do not yell at him, if he does something wrong just sit and talk with him about what has happened. Do not be quick to judge and punish. (b) Show 100% support, care, and love. (c) Teens at this point in their life, like their freedom. Do not smuther him, give me his distance. (d) Try to be "cool".

Answer 9

Tell him you are sorry you tend to yell and lose your temper and you don't mean to take your stress out on him. Drag him away from the video games and spend some time with him doing stuff together....something like going out for dinner once a week so you two have to sit there and talk....he may be quiet for awhile but eventually it should help open up the lines of communication. Keep yourself in check when you feel you are going to yell or lose your temper...most people, both kids and adults, do not like to be around people who are always yelling at them so it isn't surprising he is shutting himself off from you.

Answer 10

Well first off i would sit him down and tell him that you want to be a better parent and your open to suggestions...although kids his age arent too quick to hang out with the 'rents I would suggest taking an interest inhis video games... tell him you need a way to unwind and you need an outlet an ask him if he can teach you how to play a game...