My oldest daughter is almost 8 years old and in 2nd grade. What age should you start talking to your children about sex and drugs? And what do you say? I had sex before marriage and got pregnant and while I don't regret what I did, I also don't want my daughter to do the same thing. We were taught abstience and my mother was adimate about it- so were weren't allowed to take sex ed classes at school because she didn't believe in teaching about protection.... she thought they should just teach absitinance and leave it at that. However, I'm on the fence as to what to teach my daughter- I do believe in teaching her abstinence, but I also know that chances are- she will have sex before marriage- so how do I go about teaching sexual safety and protection without giving her the impression that having sex at a young age etc is acceptable behavior and ok?
2007-11-29 04:40:28 · 13 answers · asked by Amy Clark 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I've taken my mums advice and gone with the theory, when she's old enough to ask me sensibly about things, I will explain them to her.
My nine year old has seen me through two pregnancies now so she's been curious, I've bought her biology books and talked her through basic details and she's worked the rest out from reading and her own desire to know. Mostly she just looks at me in horror at the thought "You did THAT with my dad".
My five year old when asking how babies were made has been told that men and women have grown up things they do when they are in bed and hugging and sometimes this makes a baby, she's satisfied with that for now.
2007-11-29 05:06:42 · answer #1 · answered by einochi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Believe it or not, she has spoken to her friends about sex already, but its more silly stuff than actual science. In Junior High most schools will begin sex education and thats a perfect time to have "the talk" before she is scheduled to take that class, and if she has any questions throughout the course to ask you for additional details. So wait a couple of years for 5th and 6th grade and the boys to get some peach fuzz, this will give you plenty of time to do research on whats the best things or views you think is right for you to teach her.
2007-11-29 12:50:07 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
at this age you need to teach her about body changes and the differences between male and female
start with her body. boobs hair shaving periods
then teach her about the male body and use proper terms
dont worry about the dont have sex talk just yet. and drugs tell her the dangers how stupid it is show her pics of people high on drugs and how they get hurt and od
when the sex stuff comes up tell her the truth that you didnt wait. she will probably already have that figured out kids arent stupid and put her in sex ed too and always keep the lines of communication open answer all questions honestly
2007-11-29 13:00:52 · answer #3 · answered by kleighs mommy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's 8, so I would begin with puberty and what happens and what to expect. Take it one subject at a time. After puberty begin talking about sex, drugs, drinking and whatever else. Make sure she knows that she can talk to you about anything. That is the way I have handled it with my daughter. She's almost 14 and we have very open communication. Sometimes when a commerical comes on, I start a conversation with her about that subject, whether it be drugs or sex. Just make sure it is an ongoing thing, not just one talk and done.
2007-11-29 12:53:15 · answer #4 · answered by Softball Mom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she probably already knows about sex. and you should start telling kids about sex at around 6 or 7. most kids hear it from friends before they hear it from paraents so it is important to get there first.
at this age you can teach her what sex is and about homosexuality and general stuff. you wont have to teach her about drugs till middle school.
i would teach her to be repsonsible. teaching her only about abstinence will get her into trouble. she needs to know as much as possible in order to make a responsible and mature descision. yes, she may have sex at a young age, but that is despite whether you teach her abstinence or not.
do not fill her with guilt over sexual expression. most people will have sex before marriage. make her a strong person who knows that sex can wait but if it happens she does not have to feel shame and guilt in the sense that she is betraying you. these are unhealthy feelings and will not stop her from having sex, they will only make the expereinces bad.
2007-12-01 19:19:44 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think Melissa's answer is right on track. My daughter is 7 and we've talked about things as they have presented themselves all through her life: why boys have the parts they do and girls have theirs; where babies grow in a woman's body; why older girls wear tight clothes; how bodies change from boys/girls to men/women; some slang terms for body parts that she has heard. If you are willing to answer her questions in a calm way, you are building her trust in you. And she'll keep coming to you when she has questions.
I do want my daughter to be aware of things before they happen (like menstruation) so she is prepared. But I don't feel like it would be effective to sit down and share everything in one talk. I'm figuring some of this will come up over the years between now and puberty.
2007-11-29 13:07:15 · answer #6 · answered by warehaus 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is too young to give a lot of heavy information to. She should know where babies come from and that for a baby to grow into a healthy adult they have the best chance of doing so if there is a dedicated mother and father who are mature, financially stable and who love each other and can share this love with a baby. You should tell her that all other situations are inferior and that an innocent child deserves only the above situation. When she is older you should tell her about family planning and let her decide for herself.. If you teach her to be responsible and loving she will not make mistakes that you are worried about her making, she will take precautions.
2007-11-29 12:59:20 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would teach teach abstinence at first....there is a difference of a 14 year old having sex and an 18 or 19 year old. The drug and sex talk go hand in hand....cause all my first sexual expediences were with alcohol. Alcohol impairs judgement and makes it more likely that they will engage in risky behavior. Also I got to DUI's b4 18
2007-11-29 12:45:58 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would definitely start talking about drugs now, but I would wait on the sex thing till she starts asking some questions. You start the conversion just like any other conversion. What do you think about drugs? Have you heard about all the different drugs out there? Which ones do you think are the worst? Start the conversation like that. As far as sex Just ask if she has heard about it. If she hasn't let her know you will be talking about that when she gets just a little older.
2007-11-29 13:01:21 · answer #9 · answered by Bilinda G 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
have 5 children it is a myth this birds and bees talk, it is something started at birth and continues throughout there life, through conversation, example, and your lifestyle, you choose your opportunities carefully when they open the door answer questions when the situation presents itself to discuss different age appropriate topics, if you try to teach someone the facts of life in one sit down you are destine to fail, a child will hit overload, and all the info will go out the window,
2007-11-29 12:54:33 · answer #10 · answered by melissa s 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋