Oh no... I knew it...?

Question

Oh no... my boyfriend did cheat on me. I mean, yes I felt that he did... and he did. Remember when I was so proud of him being faithful 2 me? Well, I was going to write something to him on his myspace when i thought that his profile was mine... anyway it was an accident that i read his mssgs. This was what I found in his box:
"[his name] i am just going to tell you one thing and then i think i need to stay away from you for a while. if you ever remember what we talked about last night i meant what i said. But i take it all back seeing as you don remember . In the future please don't say or do that to me again unless you mean it next time okay. I guess i talk to you in a few months so that way i can forget about all that went on last night.

p.S. i guess i really will never know

I..........can't really say anything else"

WHAT IS THIS SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!

WHAT DO YOU THINK HE SAID TO HER????

Well his story goes. This other friend of ours [who had a bf, too] and him started talking late one night and flirted a lot. After flirting with her, he hung up and just never answered her back because he "felt horrible about it". Obviously they had a really great flirtation session because the girl e-mailed him back saying that she can't talk to him anymore because of what they talked about last night....

how am i supposed to interpret all of this? i talked to him about it and he said that he felt really horrible about it and now he's trying to make it up to me.... but idk how he can..............

he broke my heart T_T.

ps. don't answer saying "GET OVER IT"
instead say something helpful to me. k?
Just really sad and hurt and disappointed... and all that crap.....

he knows i have his myspace. also, i don't check his myspace often ok? the date on the thing was like on september!!!

i logged in so that i can put something on his myspace saying "I LOVE YOU. I HACKED YOU!" or something.... mmk?

he knows i know... i mean i confronted him about it... 2x.. and he keeps saying sorry and all that...

The letter was from the girl to my man.

he wasn't being all defensive tho... at least he told me straight out and is still saying sorry and all that.... idk.... i forgave him... but now i'm just unsure where his loyalty, heart, and mind is anymore. my trust in him has shattered.

but atm im trying to work things out with him.

WHAT DID THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!

well i took a look at the positives... at least he didn't reply back to her... but he should've confronted her and stuff and say that he loves me [musicbabe] or something and tell her he did a VERY VERY bad thing with her and that he loves me [musicbabe]... don't u agree?

i was certain that he was "the one"

compared to him... the other guys i gone out with eventually turned out to be jerks who badmouthed me and shut me down. at least he wasn't angry at me right?....

omg im so confused.... i still haven't asked him what he and she talked about y'know... "i meant what i said yesterday .... but im taking it all back seeing as you don remember it... i meant what i said" and the "don't say or do that to me again unless you really mean it" part.....

it's been 2 days... and we've talked about it 2x... is it still too late to bring this up?

is it still too late to bring it up?

I was in his house plenty of times and he didn't want to do 'it' with me unless I'm truly ready. REALLY.

Thanks everyone... but in the end I forgave him. When it all came down to it, I just love him y'know?
I am grateful, too, that I found this side of me. I never ever would have thought I'd forgive anyone who would be in a committed relationship with me like this. Never ever. Took some time to get over the disappointment, the hurt - basically the whole ordeal, but gahh i just love him!
My heart is ok now. And besides, this just means he's more aware now that he will lose me if anything [of this magnitude or greater] like this will happen again...

only... there won't be a next time. I'm sure of it. :)

yeyyy! hurray for love!

Answer 1

While he didn't go out to have a hot, torrid physical encounter, betrayal is betrayal. I know you can't console yourself with what he didn't do, since you are so torn up about what he did do. Still there is a lot to say for the one that can forgive and leave in the past the trespasses of one they care a great deal about. You can't torture yourself with that betrayal, and you can't continue to hold it against him. It's exhausting to do that, isn't it? You need to forgive him, for your sake and his. He still loves you, he made a mistake. That mistake had it's value in some ways, since it woke him up to the fact that something so easily done, could cost him something that wasn't easy to find, and that's what the two of you share. That along with knowing the level of pain he has caused you is probably punishment enough for him. Of course you're no push over and he knows this. He wont make the same mistake again without knowing what he stands to lose. Now it's up to you to trust again and move on together. Try. You love him so it's not impossible. I hope your pain is eased by what I've said and the truth within these words. I wish the two of you luck and happiness. ;-)

Answer 2

omg.. that is so sad. esp wen i read this part
'if you ever remember what we talked about last night i meant what i said. But i take it all back seeing as you don remember . In the future please don't say or do that to me again unless you mean it next time okay. I guess i talk to you in a few months so that way i can forget about all that went on last night. '

it was as if they exchanged i love u's and to each other. yah he was defnitely cheating on you. to guys , flirting isnt as bad as sexually cheating on u, but flirting with other people when in a relationship always leave bad feelings, try to look at where hes at. at least he realized that he almost risked losing u. owning up to it can either mean hes really sorry or confident that u will forgive him [an ***] and wants sum. so watch out for that!! toher then that i hope you guys work it out!

also the last part 'p.S. i guess i really will never know

I..........can't really say anything else"

sounds as if the girl is waiting for him. tell him to cut off the strings by finishing his business with her. u used to say he was great and once u had like so many question dedications to him, so u should look at all his positives.

Answer 3

I'm sorry to hear about that it sounds so confusing. I would go talk to him in person not online or on the phone, but meet with him and tell him that it bugs you no matter how small or innocent it may be. Maybe what this girl is talking about on his myspace is that she doesn't want him flirting with her unless he's serious and single or something like that? I honestly have no clue, but try to find out the truth from him. Don't give up on him before you confront him again, everyone makes mistakes. Hopefully it goes well, good luck!

Answer 4

oh crap!
he seemed like a great guy!!!!
im sorry but if he's just a lil bit ch he doesnt worth ur tears, its normal to b dissapointed and 2 feel how u do its part of the grieving process but u'll get over it!
and this is actually something good i mean do u really wanted to b with a guy like that? its good that u know the truth now instead he would have been cheating on u still and it could have been even more painfull
plus u learned something, that u cant trust everyone and it will help u to b more careful next time...
i know u'll b alright, just give it time, let it out ,cry ,listen to music,scream,punch ur pillow, and then just accept it and find something to do so u can cheer up u'll b fine and there are sooo many guys out there that worth it
but just in case u concider getting back with him think about it a lot!
good luck!

Answer 5

first off confront him and if he freaks out that you asked just be honest. and tell him he needs to quit the crap. dont worry im not gonna say get over it. but you do deserve so much better. im sure that your a great girl who only wants to share you love with someone who will love you the way you should be and you don't have to feel insecure all the time. so you do need to just stay away from him. i know it will be hard but i find that sad music, chocolate ice cream and friends seriously help. and if he asks why tell him. and don't let him turn it on you for reading his messages.

Answer 6

I'm sorry hon,just take some time to think about it n try confronting him n tell him that if he used to do that to other girls,don't do it to u .Hon ,stand up n tell him that his not the only guy on earth n dump him.He's no more worth of ur trust.Be a woman,show him that u r unique n special n that u can get another guy. Go try someone else.Good Luck.

Answer 7

It is a difficult situation.These matters depend on each person's attitude towards, love, relationships and towards women.
It is easy to understand men but not women - they are too deep/devious/mysterious.
Once they want something and immediately do not want it for no other reason than feeling that they don't want it.
What I think is supposed to mean is teasing a fish to catch it when it gives up the fight..

Answer 8

Dump his a**. Why be with someone who likes to flirt with other girls, and possibly takes it to the next level. Don't you deserve someone to wants to be with you, and ONLY you? A man who treats you like a queen, and would never thinks of even being alone with another woman, or even do "innocent" flirting.. Everyone deserves that. Don't accept anything else.

Answer 9

a relationship takes a lifetime to build but a second to break.
you still think allot of each other. he has not only broken your heart he has broken your trust as well. you might want to keep in touch with him you might not but one thing for certain you need to know why he did this with out shouting at each other. go out for a drink and have long chat and try to get the answers you want.

Answer 10

He said he feels terrible about it???? If so then why didn't he come clean about it to you? Usually once a cheater always a cheater...if this is the first that you know of, I'd watch him. If not DUMP him. I don't know how old you two are but if you're sexually active I'd be getting tested for any STD's that he might have given you.