Vegetarian couples married/getting married: what did you serve?

Question

I have received so many negative responses to the fact that I will be having a vegetarian wedding. Both my fiance and I are lacto-ovo vegetarians and for moral reasons. We would be uncomfortable with serving meat (including fish). But many people think I should accomodate to my guests' preferences. Or else they'll starve (i know, crazy).

I feel that it's only one meal, and vegetarian food does not mean starvation! Quite the opposite, you can eat tons and get your protein (and all other nutrition) quite easily. There's no 'imposing', as it's just one meal. And everyone can enjoy it (I will be having 1-2 vegans, so I'm trying to work around that as well).

I asked this question under the Wedding section, about what people would want at a Vegetarian wedding...got lots of responses dealing with people starving and they wouldn't go and it's rude, etc etc.

For those of you vegetarian couples who had a vegetarian wedding reception, how did you manage it?

Did people complain? Were people quite satisfied? What did you serve?

Please, I don't want responses from others going "You're a rude person". I don't really care for it, it just fills up my e-mail.

Answer 1

It is your wedding and so it is completely up to you what you serve. It is your special day and you are inviting those close to you to share it. If they are close to you then they can cope with eating 1 vegetarian meal out of their entire life; it really is not a big deal to most people.

We had a vegetarian wedding and are the only vegetarians in our family. I found the idea of animals being slaughtered to celebrate my marriage to be abhorent. My mother warned us that people would complain but other than a couple of people commenting on it under their breath and a couple people not liking 1 out of the 3 courses most people ate and enjoyed their meal.

Best advice is not to go for anything too obscure that non-vegetarians might not recognise. Equally don't go for something really boring. You want it to be a special meal. Don't be bullied into serving something you don't want. And take a couple of meat-eaters along to the food tasting to get their opinion on the options. We did and the plates were practically licked clean.

We also warned people in advance that the food would be vegetarian so that they were prepared. We did this by placing a note in our invites along the lines of 'we hope that you will enjoy the vegetarian meal we have chosen'.

We served a melon starter with pineapple and grapefruit compote and pomegranate coulis. The main course was a roasted mediteranean vegetable crumble in a filo pastry basket, served with a spicy tomato chutney and seasonal vegetables. This was all followed by a very rich white and dark chocolate parfait with raspberry coulis. Our wedding cake was also vegetarian and so was our evening buffet.

Have a lovely day.

Answer 2

Sorry I haven't had a wedding but if/when I do it will definitely be a vegan one!

One thing I will suggest is give them the best veg food they've ever tasted! I think this is a great opportunity to show that it tastes as good, if not better, than meat. I would serve vegan chinese because it tastes amazing and a lot of the meat eaters I've introduced it to love it. Here's an example:

http://www.veggieinn.com

My favourite's the sweet and sour 'chicken', mango 'ribs' and crispy aromatic 'duck'. The texture of the fake meat is just like the real thing and the flavour and sauces make it hard to tell the difference. Whatever you choose, try the caterer's food beforehand and make sure your guests have a veggie meal they'll never forget! Congratulations and good luck with the wedding!

Answer 3

I don't see how it's rude to serve your guests delicious food. Just because people eat meat it does not mean that they require meat at every meal! And anyone who truly cares about you should not want you to compromise your ethics. If you were both recovering alcoholics, nobody would expect you to serve booze just because some guests might have theperception that they can't go an evening without a drink.

When I got married, the question was fairly easily solved because my ceremony wasn't until 7:30pm. We sent out invititions that said "Dessert reception immediately following the ceremony." We figured that people would take it one of two ways and either think to themselves, "Well, we'll want to have an early dinner before we go..." or "Save room for dessert!" We had a variety of desserts from light (fresh berries in little tart shells) to decadent, and of course, a cake.

If I was doing a dinner, I'd probably arrange a buffet of tasty but fairly "normal" things (i.e. not tofu - I love it, but some people would be a little put off by it.) And I wouldn't even mention on the invitation that there'd be no meat - there's no reason why anyone would *need* to know that ahead of time.

Answer 4

i think you should have a vegetarian wedding. i don't know if you are having a family style sit down or something more relaxed, but either way there are many choices. and very Delicious ones too, i think your guests would be happy to be there and will enjoy the food (i do every day). you can serve little cucumber sandwiches in a shape of a heart for appetizers, and for an entree you could serve a pasta dish with a meat substitute or eggplant, the cake will have eggs and milk, but since you are lacto-ovo that is ok. I'm sure that it will be great. and your guests are people you love and care about and who care abut you and your morals.

Answer 5

I am really pleased for you that you are having a vegetarian wedding. It is your weeding at the end of the day and it should be as you want it. Unfortunately, I bowed to pressure and allowed my husband to order chicken for our guests, a fact that still irritates me to this day.

What amazes me is that so called omnivores seem to think if they have one meal which doesn't contain meat they'll drop down dead . I have tried explaining on many that even an omivore diet should contain far more fruit and vegetables than it does meat for good health. You would be simply helping your guests on their way to their five a day!

Personally, I think people come to a wedding to celebrate with you, it's your special day it really should not be about what your guests want. No-one will starve. As you are lacto-ovo, you could choose a cheesy dish (most meat-eaters I know are very fond of cheese!) and perhaps a nice veggie-lentil dish for your vegans.

Good luck, I hope it all goes well for you.

Answer 6

Good for you, stick to your guns (!), and have a meal that you and your husband will enjoy. My brother got married recently and they served turkey and ham for the main course. I asked could I have a look at the veggie options because I wouldnt be eating that. After much rolling of eyes and tutting and 'but we have made the final choice for the menu already, its too late', they called the hotel, they sent me about 8 choices, I eventually went for vegetable curry and pilau rice. When other guests walking past the table seen it and asked how had I managed to get that, the general opionion was 'thats such a good idea and something different from the usual standard wedding dinner', and my favourite, 'I wish I'd thought of doing that'. Have your own choice, noone will starve and you may actually change a few minds about having meat with every meal. Good luck, hope married life is great for you.

Answer 7

I'm not married, but if I ever do get married, I will do my best to have a luxurious vegan dinner.

VegNews magazine every year has a feature of vegan weddings. I think it's the January issue. If you can get a few back issues of their wedding issues, you might get some ideas for veg*an weddings.

Crudites and hummus make for nice appetizers.

Something with mushrooms is good for a main dish, such as grilled portabellos with either a luscious rice pilaf or mashed potatoes and roasted vegetables. There's a product called Gardien (sp?), which is incredibly realistic, and as far as I know, only available to food-service companies.

Don't go against your principles. Have a beautiful dinner, and best wishes to you both for a long happy life!

Answer 8

They will forget all about the lack of meat if you have a well planned vegetarian menu.


You need to find a great caterer who is familiar with vegetarian cuisine.

There is nothing wrong with serving grilled eggplant, with seasonal vegetables and a fragrant rice. You can easily do a lovely roasted butternut squash soup and swanky salad for starters.

It is your wedding. Do what you are comfortable with. People are there to share the day with you, not to eat steak.

Answer 9

Not being a veggie myself, I have tasted some well thought out absolutely delicious meals with friends who are "foodies" as well. If you are paying, then they should have the courtesy to eat the food you are laying on or stay away, or take a pie and sandwiches. Give them enough booze and they won't notice anyway.. have a good wedding and marriage soon you will be so busy with children you will laugh off this minor set back or if career minded you know it is more offensive to serve meat only menus to veggies.

Answer 10

I've "met" (online) quite a few couples who had vegetarian or vegan weddings.

The short & sweet answer is: it's your wedding and it's your business. Personally, I wouldn't invite anyone I knew who would throw a fit over what food I served. I don't give a **** if they're family. People who loved you wouldn't do that and I wouldn't care to celebrate my marriage with people who don't respect me. They're supposed to be there to support and respect ME not piss & moan that they didn't get to eat what they wanted. I don't ***** and moan because I'm stuck with a dry salad at half the places I'm invited to because people think liquid chicken should go in everything. I go for the reason I'm invited. Make the food vegetarian, make it good, and don't advertise it as veg. Good food is good food.