I can't say I love my family (As in Dad, Mom, Sister)?

Question

Don't get me wrong I don't hate them at all, I care about my family just as much as anyone else would

Its just that word I can't say.

I'm talking on the phone to my grandma and she says "Okay bye I love you"

"Okay...something or other"

I just can't say I believe in love outside of a romantic sense. I've never had a girlfriend though, so I can't say I've ever "Loved" anyone in the way I think.

what is wrong with me

Answer 1

I can kinda of relate to you with this subject.. people in my family like to kiss each other on the cheek or something give an affectionate hug. And this totally weirds me out. I actually worry about how I am going to handle it when a aunt or grandma leans in for the kiss. I have my own children and I have no problem showing them affection, but the though of someone showing me it or trying to go out of my way to hug or kiss someone else, is defiantly outside my comfort zone. My question to you is, when growing up did your parents or family members show you that kind of affection? I mean obviously by your question they are trying to show you now by saying ,"I love you" I don't think there is anything wring with you. Everyone expresses them self in their own way. Don't beat yourself up for not returning someone else's feelings. You are who your are, and that's all that you can be. :-)

Answer 2

Nothing's wrong with you. One day you'll look back and realize that you appreciate them more than you ever thought you would. Usually this type of realization comes after you've survived some horrible event or you've developed a greater degree of maturity. If your family is not very affectionate it's not unusual that you don't feel comfortable using the word. But from what you describe, that you care about them as much as anone else would, you love them. You just don't know how much yet.

Answer 3

Nothing is wrong with you. I was raised in a loving family but non-demonstrative family. Meaning I sheldom got hugs or kisses from my Mom or other family members. I attribute this to my upbringing. This might be the case in your family. Did you get kisses and hugs from your Mom and Dad when you were growing up? You could put yourself out there, meaning kissing and huging and it might start being reciprocated by your family members. Try it and see what happens. Also, sometime teens may go through stages of non-affection so don't be too alarm about that.

Answer 4

Nothing wrong with that. Love can be expressed in other ways besides saying the words. It wasn't until I was around 25 that I could actually tell my brother/sister/Mom that I loved them. It was weird at first and I'm still uncomfortable with it, then you get more used to it. Honestly, the words are over-rated. Doing things that 'say' you care about someone is the best thing.

Answer 5

There isnt a thing wrong with you but you have not understood yet what "love" is. Love can take many forms. Essentially, Love is the feeling of unconditional positive regard. Unconditional acceptance of another person ( and yourself) warts and all, wanting the best for someone else. feeling care and tenderness. Romantic love is just one form of love and often raging hormones and attraction are mistaken for love. Philosophers can say it all much better then me, give the library a try .

Answer 6

Don't worry about it. Not all of us feel a true sense of love for our families. Its drummed into us via society that its normal to love our parents and siblings. But this is not always the case. Sure we can like them but often we actually love our friends more.

Also many people (myself included) step right away from families that hurt us.

And its very possible that in your case you actually do love your family but just don't do the gushy talk stuff and that's OK too.

Answer 7

There are many different kinds of love. There is the love between one person and their exclusive other - sexual or passionate love, there's platonic love - the love of friendship, the love of family, the general love of humanity.
It is a word that is often abused "I love ice cream" or "I love that music!". No wonder you don't want to say the "L" word. It really doesn't matter if you want to say it or not, what matters is that you feel it - that you realize the care you feel for your family IS a form of love.

Answer 8

Words can not express much of your affection to you family. Even if you say "I love you" to someone, but it is not congruent to your overt behavior then these words have lost its meaning. There is nothing wrong with you. You are not may be used to saying I love you to someone or anybody else. However, if both word and action speak of the same message, that is something that you have to discover yourself as you travel the path of life.

Answer 9

Someone once told me that "Love is a self-sacrificial commitment to another person using your financial qualities, your caring qualities, and of course, you're heart".

I have never told any of my family members that I loved them, and I don't regret it either. I gave them gifts, cared for them when they were sick, and was there for them any time they needed me. And now, 18 years later, I don't even talk to them. I still don't regret saying it; because they knew even if I didn't say it; I was always there for them.
Maybe thats what love is, just being there for someone in their time of need.

Don't worry too much about it, nearly everyone goes through it.

Answer 10

Nothing is wrong with you, you still have that deep care for your family which is normal, love is just a different base you want to experience with another person some day, dont stress it