(my parents).. ok so i never drank in high school, mostly because my friends didn't either. now i go to a party college and i do drink with my new friends on weekends (but responsibly). i'm not sure if my parents know or how to tell them.. the only reason i feel like it's a big deal is because
a). my twin brother lives close to home. he is more 'innocent' and i influence him, and i don't want to influence him to drink or anything. (he is a little depressed and also has aspergers, mild form of autism)
b). my older brother is a recovered addict- of alcohol and pot. he was never like on the streets or anything, but now he is weird about drugs and alcohol. not weird, but he tends to think everyone is going to become an addict.
so advice? it feels like such an awkward situation.
2007-11-14 14:43:24 · 7 answers · asked by regina 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
my parents know that my roommates drink alcohol and they found an empty vodka bottle in our fridge, so i'm pretty sure they have an idea..
2007-11-14 14:44:22 · update #1
Your sort of out on your own now, so there is no reason to tell them. If they "kind of have an idea" and haven't asked, they don't want to know. By that I mean that they don't want there to be any reason to know. No DUI's, no minor in possessions, keep the grades up to your standards, no blowing all your money in a moment of drunkeness, no losing cell phones, no nights in detox, generally no stupid behavior due to drinking. I would say that the vast majority of former (your parents) and current college kids drink alcohol. Given what you have said about your family, it is best not to partake while staying at home - at least not to an extent that anyone would be able to even guess you had a drink at that party. Part of being an adult is knowing your own limits and the proper place and time for various activities. Don't take it home and don't bring it up. If they ask, be honest. Like you said, they probably already know. Denying it will make you appear too immature to be out drinking and worry them more.
2007-11-14 16:19:35 · answer #1 · answered by ykoblenz1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your parents would probably not be surprised if you told them that you drink in college. As long as it's not affecting your grades and you are responsible it's a normal part of college life so they probably expect it. Although I wouldn't advertise it. There is really no reason to tell them.
As far as your brother is concerned, I probably wouldn't go out of my way to talk about it. I also have a twin brother and when we were in college, he lived at home and I went to school 200 miles away. Honestly he didn't care to hear about my drinking stories. Part of your brother growing up is he has to learn to make his own choices in life but if you still influence him, it'll be best to not say much about drinking.
Your older brother may have given you something to consider with regards to your drinking. If alcoholism does run in families you may be subseptable to it and you should keep an eye on your own actions.
The bottom line is that drinking is a normal and acceptable adult activity but you have to be responsible about it.
2007-11-14 15:01:27 · answer #2 · answered by CAITLIN 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is it really your parents business if you have fun at a party and drink a little. I have NLD/and symptoms of Aspergers trust me it won't effect your brother any. The only thing that he can be influenced by is your parents because believe it or not it's your parents views of drinking that will influence their children, not siblings and not friends. I don't think you should have to worry about it.
2007-11-14 17:20:49 · answer #3 · answered by Steven R 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a parent of 2 kids who went thru college .... We know you drink. We drank in college. Our parents (your grandparents) drank in college. Don't hide if from us, but don't tell us either. Just be responsible about it. Always carry cab fare with you so you can get home safely. Go with a buddy and don't go off and leave her or let her go off and leave you. Or have one of your group stay sober to drive home. You should be extra careful because of history of addiction in your family.
Our daughter went drinking with the same group of girls most of the time. She kept running into this one boy who kept hitting on her. She had a rule against dating anyone she met in bars. One evening the designated driver told her, "Look, I am the sober one here. I think you should give him your number." She did, they got married 2 yrs later and have a 3 yr old. He is a great guy.
2007-11-14 14:59:54 · answer #4 · answered by old beatnik 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't recommend lying if they ask you outright. If you can keep your grades up and avoid partying when you have a test the next day, I don't see why it should be a problem. On some level, they probably already know but don't want to admit it.
However, I would save the "omg we were so drunk and it was soooo funny" stories until after you turn 21.
2007-11-14 14:54:18 · answer #5 · answered by greensirena 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
possibly you are able to strengthen up. you're her boyfriend no longer her dad- no longer that he could have a say in what she does at school the two. that's a stressful time for her and probing her with questions will make her experience worse. attempt being supportive and get in the back of her going to events and making new acquaintances. She'll experience much less overwhelmed with college and could in all probability ease up on the ingesting. in case you lay it on with the guilt trip you will finally end up dumped.
2016-12-08 22:19:17 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Almost everyone in college drinks. Its a part of growing up. Just tell them that youve had a drink but your responsible with it and you wont ever drive drunk or anything. They already know trust me. They just want to hear it from you. Its part of your growing up
2007-11-14 14:55:26 · answer #7 · answered by hitop 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋