Im 31 years old, dealing with anxiety, regret, feelings of being old and close to death. I feel awful?

Question

all the time. Im going to college and I feel like Im doing it ten years too late. I just feel like Im worth nothing. I cant sleep or think. Im single with no kids and I dont know what to do. Please help?

Answer 1

i'm 31 also and have recently gone through something very similar. i guess when you reach a certain age , you look back at your life and you say to yourself. "holy ****. where has all the time gone. what have i done with my life" . i was constantly dwelling on all that i was missing from my life and then after a while i realized that i could not do anything about the past. you can dwell on wasted time in the past all you want, but that is not going to change anything. you have to look to the future and do things you know you need to do. you think you need to go to colleged ? then do it. you are single and want to change your situation ? then do something to try to change it. you are worried about death? well, accept the fact that we are all going to die someday. yes, you will loose your parents one day. yes, you will loose your siblings one day. that is a part of life. we are born, we live and we die. that is life. all you can do is accept that and do the best with the time that you have with your loved ones. you are afraid and anxious about being alone , growing old alone. alot of people have those feelings. YOU ARE NOT GOING CRAZY. hang in there and try to get some help in the meantime. maybe see a therapist and a phyciatrist for meds for a little while. hang in there and FIGHT THIS THING. it is depresssion and it is a ruthless illness. but with a little bit of help from others and effort on your part you will get better eventually.

Answer 2

I understand how you feel about getting old. I am 12 years older than you and always worry about death. I was in college, but got out because the stress was way too much to handle. I had excellent marks, but just couldn't handle all the workload. I ended up with a job in the field I was studying and didn't complete the second year. I have problems sleeping too and wake very early in the morning. It sounds to me that you are severely stressed out and the fact that you are older than most college students is making you feel out of place. I think you need to take some "me" time and have some fun. If college is too much, get out. It isn't worth the excess stress. You need to get out with people and have some fun. Try not to think of getting older, although I realize where you are coming from. Hopefully when you go out more, you will meet someone and settle down and have kids. I was 35 when I met the right person and 36 and a half when I had my daughter so it isn't too late. Do what you feel is the best for you and I hope you find what will make you happy.

Answer 3

My fifteen year-old son is sitting not 5 feet from me, playing XBOX-Live with his friends while I use his computer. He's slightly taller than me, with hair that lays in soft waves, and which really needs trimmed but he refuses a cut. He's thin, painfully so, and can't weigh more than 130 pounds. He and his friends are searching for glitches on the new Rainbow 6 game he bought yesterday, and from what I can tell they are having a wonderful time. His Easter candy is in a bowl between his feet, and his bedroom floor is littered with Starburst wrappers. He knows I'm tucking some cash into his wallet for a planned trip to Pittsburgh on Monday, and he's done nothing but talk about the clothes he wants to buy at the mall after my doctor appointment. This is what childhood should be. Playing with friends, eating candy and looking forward to a day in the city. Not beating yourself bloody and enduring crucifixion. Just reading this story makes me want to cry.

Answer 4

I am so sorry you feel this way. I am a 21 year old college student at a prestigious school and I have a ton of respect for the "non traditionally aged" students. I can't imagine how difficult it must be and how many sacrifices these students make to take the step to go back to school at any point in life. You are worth so much and don't even realize it!
As far as being single and childless...I can relate to that one! Just remember that your self worth is not tied to your reproductive achievement of lack thereof. And if you do want a partner and kids, you have plenty of time! Check out some of those grad students in their thirties, they are hot!

Answer 5

I am 30 and have been feeling overwhelmed by "getting old"
I think in our age group, we fall victim to the "where should we be by now" stigma. i am recently married, with no kids yet, we are struggling to find a house, to pay bills, and have been having a very stressful last 2 years with many deaths in our family. But with all this, you have to focus on what is positive. You are going to college, you are never too old for knowledge. That is great! Focus on what makes you happy. The mind is very powerful, try some quiet meditation when feeling anxious. You have the power to do whatever you want, whether it be to be happy or sad. Take control on your life and start living.
Get busy living or get busy dying! I think life is more important!!
Good luck!

Answer 6

At 31? Puhlease. I'm 43 and going to junior college. My daughter's grown, I haven't been with anyone in 12 years, and I'm a slob. So what. It's never too late, especially when our life spans are expected to go past 100. That means you have 70 years in front of you. You're doing good things, and you have to give yourself your worth. No one else will get it right.

Answer 7

sounds like you got a little bit of depression going on. Everyone feels down an out every now an then its normal however depression is a disease that some people are more succeptable too. Mild anti-depression medications such as lexapro or zoloft can really help they greatly reduced anxiety an also help with sleeping. taking medications for depression is not a cry for help or makes you a bad person it can actually make you feel better about yourself When you feel like no one understands what your going through GOD knows an he is always there if you need someone to talk to.

Answer 8

So..
There are many books and resources about anxiety, social phobia, etc. (I think I bought all of them). A good resource you can try is this online program (audio files ebook). It's helping me a lot (I suffer from sever anxiety disorder myself). http://www.goobypls.com/r/rd.asp?gid=296

Answer 9

You are in the prime of your life. You are young with many opportunities to look forward to. You are single with no children or marital problems. I don't see the problem. Wake up and realize what you really have. Look around there is someone wishing they were in your position.

Answer 10

dont' stress . that don't help how you feel...relax, it's not too late, if you want to do it it's o.k. cut back on the coffee...