I was adopted and just recently found my birthfather's family. He was killed in a car accident a year after my birth. No one knew about me in his family. I have now found out I have a half brother, but his mother took him away from the family as soon as my dad was killed and they were gone for 15 years. Now they say he has very little to do with the family and he took the last name of the man she married shortly after my dad passed away. I was raised an only child and would love the idea of having a brother, just not sure how it would go over. Any suggestions??
2007-11-14 14:18:29 · 8 answers · asked by Found_1999 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adoption
i faced this in march..i was one of five kids that was adopted out..my brother that i was adopted with being the youngest and i was next the other three were adopted together and a few years older than i am..i searched on and off for almost twenty years..(when i finally paid someone to find them, because i knew they existed i was two or three the last time i saw them but can tell you everything about that day)..i worried about getting into contact with them because i knew they had not searched for me because i contacted the state of ky where we were adopted...that really hurt my feelings because i went for two years thinking they didnt want to know me and were happy in their lives..so when i got my info from my adoption tracker back i wrote a very simple letter to my sister..and said i was born blah blah blah my name is blah blah blah i was born on .....and i have every reason to believe we are sisters by birth..i went on to tell her i wanted to cause her no harm and if she didnt feel the need to contact me i totally understood i gave her all my info and one week later she called me..when my phone rang before i touched it i knew it was her...i met her two months later and her life was alot like mine weird and not normal but she is a beautiful person and as a result i met one of my other brothers..i see myself in them both i have one more to meet..this same week i tracked down my dad(we all have different ones) it was a very peaceful feeling for me and something inside of me calmed down im claimed by all of them and thats all i wanted someone to claim me not because they had to but because that family connection is there...i say go for it..you can be rejected or you may find that other half of you...either way it will give you closure..good luck
2007-11-14 16:32:21 · answer #1 · answered by bailie28 7 · 5⤊ 0⤋
I have four brothers by my father, 6-15, and when i stepped into the pic 3 yrs ago, they loved it. i'm 23, so i am the cool older sister who has her own place, and a car. i also found my older brother, and it didn't go so well, he was happy not knowing i existed. he felt his life was less complicated before me, so we don't talk anymore. but i have a dysfunctional family, maybe i am the only one with that problem. i say give it a shot, whats the worse that could happen?
2007-11-17 13:22:51 · answer #2 · answered by Amanda W 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes by allmeans go for it. i know that having someone is great. with me i had two sisters. i had a mom and dad. my mom took off with another man day after i was born. yep, and i ended up with a great uncle. but my life was good. but yes, i and my sisters aren't good. they dumped me and it was sad this year to be exact but i am ok. but you maybe lucky and have a brother i would loved to had a borther. he may have been lied to which i am sure is the case and he was told his dad wanted nothing to do with him. i am sure there was no support but there are so many things that draw into that i mean his adopted parents must be great or his new dad i would think. but hey take the extra step he maybe happy to find out there is another sibling. take care.
2007-11-14 15:58:55 · answer #3 · answered by Tsunami 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I'd say go for it.
You'll forever be wondering - so you may as well try. If he does not want contact - yep - as an adoptee - that will probably hurt - but if you don't at least try - you'll never truly know.
From my own reunion experiences (limited as they are - it's early years for me!) be sure of your motivations and ideas of what you might get out of it. Think worst case scenario - think best case scenario - and hopefully you'll end up somewhere in between.
I wish you all the very best.
2007-11-14 17:17:31 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
Hm I dunno I have this problem too. My circumstances are a bit more complicted (he was born as from an affair) and I am a lot older than him. But you have it good. You should go see him, it'd be kinda cool for the both of you, I say give it a shot.
2007-11-14 14:28:08 · answer #5 · answered by Liquid Snake 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
It can not hurt to look. Prepare for any scenario positive or negative.
2007-11-15 08:42:22 · answer #6 · answered by Spread Peace and Love 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes! He's your brother
2007-11-15 05:10:11 · answer #7 · answered by H****** 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
yes its your life man good luck
2007-11-14 16:57:59 · answer #8 · answered by nicky312000 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋