I want to get married on Valentine's Day of 2008, but its on a weekday so I would have to have it in the evening, possibly night. I was thinking about just having a ceremony, and the immediate family go out after the ceremony for dinner or something.
2007-11-14 07:30:35 · 31 answers · asked by Beautiful Bride in "08" 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
That would be extremely tacky and completely go against etiquette. The whole point of the wedding reception is basically to tell your guests "Thank you for travelling to share in our big day! Here are some refreshments for the ride!". Not having a reception is basically telling people that you don't care that they had to make plans and a possibly a couple of sacrifices to be there.
Even if it's just chicken tenders, finger sandwiches, cake, and punch, have a reception.
2007-11-14 07:50:53 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 1⤋
Honestly it is rude to invite people to a wedding ceremony and not the reception.
If you just want family at the dinner, then only invite family to the dinner.
You can still have the ceremony and dinner for family, but have a reception for friends to attend on the upcoming weekend. However, you still should not invite guests to the ceremony in this case either...It just wouldn't be proper and many people would be offended.
It probabyl would be cheaper to have both the ceremony and reception for all guests during the week day anyhow. However to do this, you may want to call and make reservations for 50+ people and see what types of deals can be had if any since it's a holiday.
2007-11-14 08:02:00 · answer #2 · answered by mrsprincess07 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
No that wouldn't be tacky. Are you having a small wedding with just immediate family? If that's the case then the dinner after-wards is perfect. That is your "reception". If you are having a larger wedding and planning on not having a reception things can get a little sticky. I coordinated a wedding once that didn't have a reception after-wards. It was also held during the week and guests had to take off of work to attend. The wedding was in the early afternoon. It's a little awkward for guests traveling a distance to come to the wedding only and not be offered at least cake and punch. Keep that in mind. If you are planning on having a few more people than just immediate family maybe think of doing just a simple cake & punch reception immediately following the ceremony so guests can congratulate you, then have the special dinner with the immediate family. Guests won't hang around long if there is only cake and punch. They'll congratulate you, have some cake/punch and then be on their way.
Congratulations on your up and coming wedding! You'll be getting married on my birthday! :)
2007-11-14 07:49:03 · answer #3 · answered by holmeskaykay 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋
It's been done before. What I've seen done is a mini reception in the church lobby immediately after the vows. Basically, when you and your new husband walk down the isle as husband and wife, you lead everyone into the reception for a quick cocktail (on the house!! There's nothing tackier than having a cash bar at your wedding), a quick toast, thank you to everyone there, a few songs and dances and you're off. It's a weeknight for your guests to. They probably have things to do and places to be, but still want to be a part of your special, hopefully once in a life time day. Having nothing at all for the guests and only having the direct family involved is tacky.
2007-11-15 01:16:32 · answer #4 · answered by Dr. E. Bunny A.K.A. Andy. 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the best way to pull this off without being tacky is to only invite your family to the ceremony.
If you're thinking that you want to have 100 people come to the ceremony, but then not offer them any refreshments, I think you'd end up with some people having their feelings hurt.
Another way to do it would be to have a ceremony on Valentine's day, with just the family...Enjoy a nice dinner together, but then have a reception with your friends the weekend following.
FYI, I got married on February 13...We have always enjoyed making Valentine's Day even more romantic by celebrating our anniversary at the same time. You might consider getting married on February 15 - it's a Friday, so more of your friends might have the opportunity to stay up late celebrating at an evening reception.
FYI, I don't like the answer that suggests you might not like having your anniversary on Valentine's Day, just in case you get divorced later. I don't think anyone should be getting married, if they're already planning what date would be appropriate for their divorce.
2007-11-14 07:44:27 · answer #5 · answered by abfabmom1 7 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Hmmm... although I would usually say "it's your day, do what you want," on this one I have to go with the opposite. Going to a wedding is a huge expense for your guests -- I've read some estimates that say it costs an average of $900 to attend a wedding. That means paying for clothes, airfare (sometimes), a gift or two... and then they only get to sit through the ceremony? It sounds like the two of you are better off eloping if you can't afford even a simple reception.
2007-11-14 07:49:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
Wrong? Probably not. Tacky? Maybe. If people go to the trouble of coming to your ceremony and buying you a gift, it's common courtesy in most people's minds that they will be feed and entertained in some fashion. Some could feel like "she wants me to spend MY Valentine's day at her wedding, and wants a gift without the common courtesy of even feeding me." People ARE going to have opinions and judge you by what you do. Having said all of that, go ahead and do what you want to do. Just be aware that you will be going against a trend. It's up to you whether or not you care. Best of luck!
2007-11-14 23:14:54 · answer #7 · answered by Woods 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What you are doing is done quite frequently. There is nothing unusual or strange or tacky about it.
And actually you are having a reception . . having dinner with family members after the marriage ceremony would be considered "a reception."
Answered by: A Certified wedding specialist / A Professional bridal consultant / A Wedding ceremony officiant
2007-11-14 08:43:58 · answer #8 · answered by Avis B 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Why does everyone think that they have to spend loads of money and have a reception anyway? I think everyone has forgotten that a wedding is a special day for the bride, groom, and the families of the two! Valentines day is a beautiful day to get married and if it happens on a weekday then by all means get married on a week day and go out with your family for dinner afterwards. Another suggestion is have a family and friend get-together on the following weekend and have a cake and light snacks. Just make sure you don't leave anyone out, because people tend to get their feelings hurt! Congrats on your wedding :)
2007-11-14 07:48:09 · answer #9 · answered by sisy_girl56 2 · 2⤊ 2⤋
If you and the immediate family are going to be the only ones to celebrate after the wedding then you and the immediate family should be the only ones to attend the ceremony.
2007-11-15 08:09:49 · answer #10 · answered by beth_eliza 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋