what do i do about my ****** father?????

Question

i have nowhere else to go but stay in my room to avoid him. my friends are not around. i can't lock my door b/c if i do, he picks a huge fight with me and thinks i am doing something bad. he barges in my room w/o knocking and if i tell him to knock he fights with me. when i am not around he goes through all my things that are hidden. i found my zippo on his entertainment center that was HIDDEN IN MY UNDERWEAR DRAWER. that sickens me. im only 18 and i am his daughter. he drove my mom away by doing what he does to me. and he drove my sister away too. i would be gone, but i have nowhere to go. whenever he is around i get panic attacks real bad.. and he stole my xanax that were given to me for the attacks. i caught him RED handed. i picked a fight and he didnt even care. he was taking them to take with his beer so he can pass out like a skunk likeh e does every weekend. i have no privacy. i am a nervous wreck. he does not care nor realize that he drove everyone away and that he is making

me miserable. WHAT CAN I DO TO COPE?. I HAVE NO JOB AND ITS SO HARD TO FIND ONE. I HAVE NO MONEY AND AM IN CREDIT CARD DEBT. my mom has no money no car and dont really have a place to live. i want to live with her i miss her so much. but we dont know what to do or where to go. any advice?

Answer 1

go to the local unemployment / DHS office & tell them you need a job ASAP because of a bad situation... you could also go to a temp agency, they can often get you a job right away (may not be the best job, or last very long, but they'll set you up with another & another if need be)

then get together with your mom (& sis?) and get a place together, split the bills & whatnot. help each other to get by.
& take care of that debt (don't use the cards anymore! transfer to lower interest rates, and pay as much as you can each month--it's hard to pay off & so easy to accrue!! i know because i've been trying to pay off $12k since my divorce a little over a year ago, and i'm only down to $9k & can only pay minimums, BUT i transferred a lot to a card with no interest so i'm still making progress).

Answer 2

It sounds like your dad has an anger management problem.You will not be able to fix that so move to the next problem.Although he shouldn't barge into your room without knocking he probably thinks this is my house and can do whatever he wants to.Unfortunately you can't fix that either unless you move out.Now,you said you have nowhere to go so you must start somewhere.Start by finding a job no matter how hard it is.While looking at least you want be around him.Once you've found a job,save your money.Put it in a bank account that your dad doesn't know about and remember this,deep down inside your dad does not want to be alone,if he knows your plan he will for sure try to make it harder for you to do it.Once you've saved enough find your own place.None of this will be easy but honestly,what choice do you have?
Now pick yourself up and start your life,make it where you don't have to depend on anyone.You will also have to break the cycle of anger,you can't take that with you into your new life.If you do someone else will replace your dad as your problem.Never say I can't do this because can't never could do anything.This is not going to be easy but by your own words,WHAT CHOICE DO I HAVE?Good luck and God speed.

Answer 3

You know, he probably isn't very good at fayher-hood because his father was not so greta at it. In today's society it is not such a bad thing to let him know how he is making you feel. Just because he is the father does not mean he will always know the best way to handle a situation. I am 32 and my mother and I are just starting to have a great relationship because I took the first step. And if it doesn't work the first time, maybe he needs to be trained on how to use his manners, sometiomes the biggest of jerks can be taught a thing or two. good luck.

Answer 4

Join the military.

I did when I was 18. It was a ticket out of the house.

You'll learn a job, have free food and rent for 4 yrs. It teaches you how to make it on your own and you can take college classes if you want.

If you're feeling like you have no options, it's a good one.

Answer 5

WOW!!!!!
This sucks. I thought my father was annoying, well this is total hell.
Your going to have to just let him come in your room as he pleases, srry but he'll never stop if u keep tallking back and locking the door. I was in that sit once and my dad at random would come check to make sure i wasn't doing that. I stopped though and he stopped coming in.

Why would you have a zippo hidden in your underwear draw??? Well, anyway this is wrong, your father shouldn't be going threw your stuff, defintly your underwear. Personally this sounds really bad, forget about your lighter and try to get a friend to take you in, or maybe a family member on your moms side.

He drinks and takes your pills that you need!!! Thats just wrong, I'm sure you figured this out already but your father is a giant scumbag. Next time you get your anxiety pills hide them and don't let him find out where.

Honey, this is horrible what your going threw, you need to get out!!! you need to move away from this this is not!!! what you need in your life, go get someone to take you in lady, you cannot deal with this. Noone should have to go threw what you are, Leave now it's whats best.

If you ever need to talk about this, need a person to talk to to lose some steam my email is
[e-mail]
Please don't be afraid to contact me if you need to talk, you should have to go threw hell alone.

Answer 6

it's like everyone said ur friends or ur moms relatives might be able to help. also u can go to ur doctor let him know how ur father stole ur pills that u need and is mixing them with alcohol. that is a REAL bad idea on his case. the doctor will prolly take legal actions and even get his *** arrested. since ur 18 and still living at home, they can still get his *** for child abuse. because ur still under ur "parente's" roof. and stealing prescriptions is illegal. wont matter if it's family or not

Answer 7

Why can't you get a job? You are a grown up, like it or not and it seems that you can team up with your mother. Why can't she work? And she left without you? What about your sister helping. If you can afford to smoke, you can get yourself out of this. Surely you have other relatives, grandparents aunts/uncles that will let you stay in exchange for babysitting or cleaning and helping around the house.

Answer 8

Hi,
There are several places you might try for help with your problem. My first suggestion is to find a good church and ask to meet with the pastor. He might be able to offer you some suggestions himself but I am confident he would be a good resource to point you to some help. If you are not sure where to go for something like this you can email me and I will send you the name of a good church in your area.

Answer 9

You're 18, you can get up and leave any time you like. I know a acouple kids that had problems like you, my best friend once moved in with me for a while, and then in with someone else because his step dad was a jerk. Ask your friends if they could let you stay with them, good friends will always say yes.

Answer 10

your dad is a real big time loser.
since u dont have job or any money i gues u gotta stick with him for quite some time..
or is it possible for u to look for a partime job or something n run the hell outta ur hous?
i suggest u seek the help of ur mom or things wil get worse.
there is no reason tht u hav to put up with ur dad when he is behavin like a total wierdo!
if it is possible for u to stay wit ur sis then do tht.
or do u hv ne frens who can accomodate u until u get a job??
do somethin n RUN outta ur hous!!!!!!!