Long question, but help with knowing what to do...?

Question

I like this guy. We connected over a trip. He completely inspires me in everything. I feel so comfortable with him, and i don't think that i can imagine becoming this close to anyone else. BUT he has a girlfriend. I respect that and i don't flirt with him because of this. I know i wouldn't want anyone hitting on my boyfriend. But our innocent conversations made me fall for him. Now we talk all of the time (still innocently) and my frieds thik that there is something going on between us. I know its wrong, but i think he feels coected to me too, and it feels like we are already dating because i know that i can trust him with anything, and he's the one i want to go to when i have something great or horrible happen. I just would like to know what to do. I know that this is ot a normal crush. Never have i felt this good about something. I feel guilty because i know in my heart that we are supposed to be more thn friends, but he already has a girlfriend (a supposedly mean one, but still a gf

Answer 1

wait patiently. you might just be intrigued because he's unavailable (although it sounds like this is untrue.)
if you want to be with him, just wait. if it does happen, you'll want to feel good about it and not have a relationship tainted with the destruction of a previous one.
if he's into you, he'll come around.
if it gets to the point where you want him so bad that it hurts, write him a letter or something putting all your feelings together but tell him not to feel obliged but make it known that you're ready, willing, eager, and open to the idea of being with him.
if it's meant to be, it'll work out in the end.
good luck :)

Answer 2

Well, I Think You Should Do This - Cuz I Have Been In This Situation Before...

Do Not Intentionally Flirt With Him, Just Continue Being Friends Like You Are Now. It May Take A While, But If There Is Indeed Something Between You And Him, And He Is Into You, Then Let Him Make The First "Move" So To Speak. (A.K.A - Breaking Up With His Girlfriend, Or Confessing His Love For You) Just Enjoy Life And Take Day By Day - I'm Sure Everything Will Work Out. :)

Answer 3

First of all, you're already having what's called an 'emotional affair'.
Emotional affiars are more serious than meaningless sex indiscretions, because hearts are involved.
Honesty is the best policy. You need to tell him that your feelings are more than friendly, and you believe his are too.
He then has to make a choice.
The vast majority of boyfriend/girlfriend relationships are not that serious, his is likely the same, especially if he's being emotionally intimate with you. Odds are he'll break up with her, which was likely inevitable anyway, and you can be together.
If however he does not break up with her, you need to do the difficult and right thing and stop being his friend. The reason is, you cannot be a true friend to someone you are in love with, when they are with another. And if you care for him more than yourself, you will do what is in his best interest, and not your own.
Good luck to you.

Answer 4

You need to copy your question and send it to him, or better yet, tell him in person. Guys are not good at getting hints, or picking up on a girl's feelings (unless she is taking her clothes off, then he gets it). You stated your thoughts and feelings very well. I can not see that he would be offended at all. Maybe he feels the same way. My best friend & I felt like that with each other. When I told her, she said she felt the same (and she was engaged). She let her fiance down, and proposed to me one week later. The point is, someone has to make the first move. We've been married over 40 yrs.

Answer 5

Ask him how he feels about you and do NOT flirt or hit on him until it is mutually agreed that his girlfriend is not the right one for him. Sometimes crushes go beyond normal so you just have to see what happens- maybe it isn't true love but who knows if you do end up breaking up in the long run you could have a great friendship afterwards.

Answer 6

Um. Just be his friends but don't make it seem to other that you two have a thing going behind his girlfriends back. You can like him, but I would;t be starting anything right now. He may be wanting to start something but wait till he breaks up with his girlfriend(if he does at all). Don't go rushing in for a relationship that may not work out. Good luck

Answer 7

What a great feeling! There is nothing like the feeling of falling! Just relax and enjoy it. Be very patient and take the high road. If the feeling is mutual it will take on a life of its own and blossom. When that happens, you will want him to see you as trustworthy and having character that is above reproach. I would caution you to be yourself and always be positive ~ even about the bitchy gf. Her true colors will show up even more in contrast to your kindness.
Have fun!

Answer 8

MOVE ON DON'T BE A FOOL just let destiny take it's toll what i mean by that is if your meant to be with him you will i know it sounds b.s but it's not worth waiting for him to break up with his gf just be good friends because if you keep hoping then you'll eventually see your friendship with him drift away because your crush will turn to obsession if it doesn't cool but if you like or love someone alot it will anyways i hope you find true love one day and if you can't give up on him then best of lucks

Answer 9

It might be hard, but if he has a gf I think its best to keep him as a friend for the time being. If you guys are meant to be, in time he will get rid of this girl, and then you guys can blossom into a lot more. The ony advice I coulld give is to be patient, with any luck, and if this girl is indeed mean, soon you'll have the guy. Best of luck!

Answer 10

You sound like you like the idea of being 'just friends' with a little 'or maybe more' behind it. I mean, you already said it feels like you are "already dating" that means to me, that you see yourself in the future with him--which means, you want to hurt yourself because you know he has a girlfriend.

I see that you are trying to be the nice and good one, so when she's mean to him, you hope---he'll come running to you---like you go to him with something horrible.

You totally like this guy, but dont want to admit you do because you dont want to look like a skank.

Don't forget about other guys-he's not breaking up with anyone for you, so get on with it.