Well me and my BF have been together for 2 years now. To him we're the perfect couple. But to me we just seem too different. Im more of a fast pace person but he's not. I jsut want someone a little more exciteing and who can keep up with me. But if I leave him then I'll break his heart. We're on a break right now and I was talking to one of his friends and apparently he isnt taking it so well. But I seem happier. But its not only him I'll hurt either. My friends and family will miss him just as much. I dont want to be selfish about this. And I love him but Im not in love with him. So should I take the chance and break up with him even though it might blow up in my face. Or should I hope that things might get better even though they havent in the last 2 years?
2007-11-13 12:49:17 · 23 answers · asked by fallingxstars7 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
first of all i dont see any selfness in what you are writing, you are concern about his feelings, how is he doing and how he will react, to me thats not being selfish.
second you are not the perfect couple if one of you its not happy, fair enough youll break his heart and your family will miss him but.. hey.. that happens everytime someone ends something, its normal, its going to hurt bad, but everybody will get over it, thats life, life goes on and life continues.
i think you should talk with him and give it a chance to see if there is some improvement (tell him your needs and what you want) if nothing happens then.. well.. you gave it a chance.
something to consider is that right now you are fine, but it does sounds like you love him, when you finish it, you will miss him too, and if you go on the path of adventure, you may have lots of fun BUT hope you dont regret what you had before.
it doesnt matter how long you have been with someone, being the right for one another its not a matter of how long you have been together.. it takes more than that.
good luck with your desition!
2007-11-13 12:59:07 · answer #1 · answered by luisa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i learned that you do whatever you have to do, my bf and i broke up twice before we accually broke up...this last time we did, he ends up calling me every night, and he talks to me and wants to hang out with me more than he used to...so maybe your bf just needs a little more time to get more comfortable with the idea...who knows, if you two are meant to be together, then it will happen, just not now. but then, 2 years? it will be a lot harder, but eventually you both will get over it, not completely, but you will...mabye you should tlak to him about it, dont treat him disrespectfully or anhthing (i doubt you'd do it) but my bf tried to get me to break up with him by being mean and selfish...that will make it worse...
so you say your on a break? what kind of a break? are you guys talking? or are you accually broken up? maybe you guys just need a month, or a little more...jsut a month to think and evaluate, thats what me and my ex are doing...i dont even know if we'll get back together in a couple weeks or not...just take it easy, try not to worry, if he wants to talk, talk to him...but if you do b reak up, make sure you stay friends, it would make it a lot easier on your families...at least it might...
well best wishes...
2007-11-13 21:00:05 · answer #2 · answered by Peace, Love, Hope ♥ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, don't feel "selfish". This is YOUR boyfriend, YOUR commitment, and YOUR life. It's nice of you to think of others, but there are situations where you have to put yourself in front of others.
Second of all, if you even have these doubts about the relationship, then that means there is something wrong. Sure, there are tiny things that people may not like about their significant other, but if it was big enough to make them doubt their relationship, then you may want to reconsider breaking it up for good.
This is your choice, but my suggestion is that you break up with him. You need someone new; and he'll (hopefully) get over it, even if he likes it or not.
Hope I helped! Good luck. (:
2007-11-13 20:55:34 · answer #3 · answered by enna 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you both care for each other then tell him how you feel rather than taking a break ---- whats the deal anyway with a "break" are you together or not?? do you date other people??? ---- talk to him tell him how you feel and see what can be done --- maybe there is an animal waiting to break out and you dont know it --- if you cant resolve the problem then maybe break up then ---- best wishes
2007-11-13 20:54:33 · answer #4 · answered by Waterdragon 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to him and tell him how you feel, you probably is breaking up with a good guy, just because he is not a fast pace man, give him a chance.
2007-11-13 20:56:38 · answer #5 · answered by dbrh_soto 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all this is one of those situations
when you need to think about your happyness first.
You sound like your better off with out him.
I mean you guys can stay friends and your family and
friends can still see him. It might be breaking his heart
to let him go but look at how un happy u are. Trust me
hun. Its time to let go.
2007-11-13 20:54:41 · answer #6 · answered by Kathleen Heart 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him how you feel...and why yall are different....like the personality difference things....if he doesnt change....then tell him its a waste of time becuz of that. it may seem selfish sometimes, but if breaking up with him will make you happy then its the right thing to do....and just becuz yall arent dating nemore doesnt mean yall cant still be friends....friends are always their forever, and though there may be some difficult times, its the friendship that will shine in the longrun....and a true friend would not blow up in your face.
2007-11-13 20:57:59 · answer #7 · answered by The Wind 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can not be responible for other people. If he is not taking it well tthen he must deal with it. You can only take care of yourself. If you are happy then don't go back. Your family can stay in touch with him if they want. If you are to the point of hoping things will get better, then it is time to leave. They will not get better. Been there, done that.
2007-11-13 20:56:27 · answer #8 · answered by just me 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For 2 years were you only having hopes that things will change? Did you ever sit and talk/COMMUNICATE with him?
Tell him and explain where you stand, where you THINK he stand, what you expect out of a relationship and so on...
If it doesn't work then you have tried your best. Most people don realize what they have until they loose it. Then they keep wondering and wishing.
whatever you do, good luck.
2007-11-13 21:00:59 · answer #9 · answered by Hammer_sledge35 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can "hope" all you want but if it's not there, it's not there. If you decide to stick this out......this is it. You pretty much answered your own question here because you really know in your heart that he isn't the person you want to be with the rest of your life. Am I right?
2007-11-13 20:54:02 · answer #10 · answered by butterfliesRfree 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋