I have had no sex with my husban for 6 years. I dont think he is interested in me, so this past august I met someone 10 years younger than me and a relationship has blossom and now I make love to him everyother weekend (he is 4 hrs away from me) My husban knows of this relationship and tells me not to fall in love, to treat him as a "toy". my lover and I are in love. We want to be together, unfurtunaly, my boyfriend is not as secure as my husban in the money department. he is as broke as they come but he is an amazing music producer and has potential (lots of potential) sometimes I feel sorry and I pay some of his bills. He loves me deeply, I know that much. I can tell that my boyfriend sometimes use me but I know he needs help because he is strugling a lot and I know we will be together when his carrer finally takes off. his friends think I am the hottest girl ever and he loves that! Now my question is, should I leave my husban and be happier and poor with my boyfriend?
2007-11-13 11:48:08 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Yes, would you like it if someone was with you only for your money, as you said you are doing to your husband?
2007-11-13 11:54:48 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't take me as an authority on religion. But sex with another man would be comitting adultry. On the other hand a husband or wife not fullfilling duty of providing the loving that is expected in a marriage is forcing the other to comitt adultry. A tricky situation. I suppose divorce to most legitimate option. Leaving the religion I will say if your husband approves take a lover, but only one. You don;t want to have multiples. And depending on your age and all, it would be preferable to find a man in similar circumstances where the wife cannot provide but still has other love that keeps them together. I really sympathize with your situation. But I realize the needs and suggest this as a compromize between morals and basic human needs,
Neither would I recommend treating him like a toy. And both of you should be commited to each other in the relationship and no other lovers. Sex without committment is like making love to a mannequin, a lifeless object.
2007-11-13 12:12:18 · answer #2 · answered by genghis1947 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hope this is just a fictional story... cause it's completely wrong. See, the horrible thing about life, is that you don't win in these types of situations. If you stay with your husband, you'll either regret not leaving or he's gona come to his senses and throw you to the curb (which you deserve by the way... no offense). Now if you leave your husband, you're screwed cause your "boy toy" doesn't care about you, he just needs some of your chump change, he's basically the stereotypical woman using the man, only the gender roles are reversed... so once he is done with you, you will be replaced with something younger and hotter... so pick wisely, or ditch 'em both and start fresh on craigslist....
2007-11-13 11:57:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The decision is yours but you should really think about things like why are you still with your husband? Because he has money? Why do you have a lover? Because you want to have sex? Or because you actually love him? There are so many questions you need to ask yourself but in the end it just comes down to one... Who do you really love? Once you answer that remember that money doesn't make you happy so it shouldn't matter who has more of it!
2007-11-13 11:58:04 · answer #4 · answered by cute_chica 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all why aren't you having sex with your husband? This is sick and twisted and wrong. You get married for better or worse not for when it's convenient. Go to marriage counseling or get divorced. You can't have your cake and eat it too. Your boyfriend is using you and would be gone the moment you didn't help with the bills. Grow up and be a woman!
2007-11-13 11:58:01 · answer #5 · answered by Ethelucy 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you should leave your loveless marriage, but not to immediately go to this guy! He needs to get himself stable before you just jump right in. Have some fun I guess, but he doesnt sound like the answer and your long term prospects are very slim...in other words, once he is on his feet, time for a young girl!
2007-11-13 11:56:43 · answer #6 · answered by JP 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't sound like the relationship with your husband is much of a marriage if he doesn't care about your affair. Maybe you should leave your husband -but get a roomate-and wait to see if this boyfriends carreer does take off
2007-11-13 12:01:18 · answer #7 · answered by catfur4u 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well of course its always wrong to do that when you are married.... but the question you should ask yourself is .... would you rather have nice material things and be unhappy and not taken care of..... o would you rather be completely happy and have less..... If you two love each other then you should be together .... You shouldn't waste anytime ...... If you want to be with him then you should go and not look back.... there is nothing wrong with trying to be happy and wanting better
2007-11-13 11:56:37 · answer #8 · answered by judesp25 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What you're doing is wrong. Maybe you should consider couples counseling and you should decide WITH YOUR HUSBAND what is wrong with your relationship and address those problems or break ties. Cheating on your husband is wrong. Period. I certainly hope your "toy" is clean. I would lose sexual interest, too, if I thought my partner was catting around and potentially bringing home souvenir STDs.
2007-11-13 11:55:11 · answer #9 · answered by Quiet Tempest 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
U said urself that ur bf is using u and thats ttly wrong! Choose 1 or the othr. Leave ur husband or leave that othr dude. Im sorry, but u sound kinda messd up.
2007-11-13 11:57:32 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree with Giggles. Leave them both. Your husband doesn't seem like he's in love with you anymore, and your younger boyfriend is using you for sex and money. If your boyfriend is 4 hours away, he probably has other girlfriends who give him money too! (Along with other things!)
2007-11-13 11:57:27 · answer #11 · answered by Missy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋