I have been babysitting about 4 times a week since my grandaughter was 2 onths old. My daughter was trying to go to school and work ,and being a single teen parent I felt it was my duty to help her. Should I have charged her for this? I LOVE my granddaughter sooooo much I have to see her every day or it just is not as good a day as it could be. Am I helping her or hurting her?
2007-11-13 10:36:07 · 12 answers · asked by Jennifer M 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I think every family is different. Some grandparents help out a lot and others very little. I think it is what every works for you and your family. If it feels OK to you, then it is OK. If you are every feeling taken advantage of or unhappy you need to adjust the situation.
2007-11-13 10:39:57 · answer #1 · answered by Oh me oh my...♥ 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i think you are doing the right thing, its better your grandchild is with you than with other people who have no attachment to the child, the baby will always know love which is what they need, i can understand what you mean about charging, im sure its not because you want the money but to teach your child the importance of how much childcare costs, in which case yes charge her, but a very low amount, so she knows your doing it for her own good not just because you want money, you will love your grandaughter, with your daughter still being a teen you will have lots of maternal feelings just there! but you daughter is no longer a baby so them feelings have transfered, this is normal yes, but not good for you, maybe try going out more, seeing friends getting a new hobbie,
You are helping your daughter, your not hurting her, hurting her would be doing what so many parents of teenagers have done.... walking away
you are a good parent and a good grandparent
wish you luck x
2007-11-13 18:44:56 · answer #2 · answered by lisadepont 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If your daughter is using the time you are babysitting to go to school and work, then you are helping her. Its up to you about charging her though. I'm on the fence about it myself. I mean is your daughter very appreciative of what you are doing for her? Does she help you out with things when she can? I just honestly hope she appreciates all you are doing for her. As you are worried about, its a fine line between helping her, and enabling her. Its one thing to help her "get on her feet" but another to make this a lifestyle. And its wonderful you love and enjoy your granddaughter so much, just know you can see her every day with visits as well, it doesn't always have to be in a babysitting capacity.
Anyways, I babbled on, but I think this is all fine as long as its a "get her on her feet" type of thing, so she can finish school, and as long as she is appreciative of what you are doing. Good luck!
2007-11-13 18:58:09 · answer #3 · answered by Mom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If watching your granddaughter is something that brings you immense joy, I don't think you should charge your daughter for childcare. She SHOULD offer some sort of money to you when she can, or offer to take you out for a nice adult dinner every now and then.
My husband made the best analogy about babysitting grand kids. Having my mother babysit our child is like having my husband babysit someone's wide-screen TV with a ton of HD channels and killer surround sound.
2007-11-13 19:09:03 · answer #4 · answered by elizabeth_ashley44 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not like your daughter is out clubbing, and partying and being an idiot...
She's trying to work and educate herself...that's a good thing
Give her all the support you can for that...and no I don't think you should be charging for it...
She's lucky to have you, and as long as she's using your favor to better herself and in the long run provide a better future for your grandchild...I think you are absolutely helping...
Now if you were babysitting so that your daughter could go hang out with friends and party and drop out of school...then yes you'd be enabling her to be a loser...but that's not the case.
I think you're doing the right thing!
Kudos to you and your daughter
2007-11-13 18:42:27 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I think that as long as she is at work or at school, then you should not start charging. She needs the money for her child and herself, and better their future. But if she was to hang with friends a lot and partying and stuff, then yes, then charge.
You're actually helping her right now and not enabling her. It's only enabling if she wasn't going to school or wasn't working, or she was being neglectful of her responsibilities to her child.
I commend you for babysitting. I know someone who's parents don't really want to help, but only doing it because she can't pay anyone else. I commend you not only out of your love for your granddaughter, but you sacrificed your life to help your grandchild. Yes, I do admit, parents do have the right to enjoy the free life once their kids can fend for themselves, and there's nothing wrong with that (provided that the parents of the child can truly find other means to have their kids watched). But you feel your day is better when it's spent with your grandchild. You are reaping the benefits! You sound like grandmother of the year type!
If comes a time you can't sit or don't want to, do help her find another sitter and help make informed decisions as not everyone is a safe babysitter.
If you do decide to charge, don't do it to for yourself, but to show her what it be like the day someone else sits for her, to help her to know no one else wants to sit for free, even if it's her siblings. Charge very low so she has money for her child and herself. Let her know that other relatives and people tend to charge because they are taking time out of their busy schedule or making sacrifices for free time to sit. A non-relative charges because they are babysitting as a side job or main job, but that goes without saying.
2007-11-13 18:55:29 · answer #6 · answered by Яɑɩɳɓɵw 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My bro and sis live in the same city as me, im single and in college, i babysit about once a week, so 2 times totall for the2 of them. Its rude, but if i really have work to do, or am really doing something important i say no, but if there sleeping and i sit on the coach and do work, i dont care
2007-11-13 18:50:12 · answer #7 · answered by Yoni 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well i believe your helping afterall you are the grandmother and if you enjoy seeing your grandaughter then I would just go with the flow. I mean it seems your daughter is trying her best with school and work. Its good of you to help her.
2007-11-13 18:40:10 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well u are helpin ur grand daughter alot. If you feel as though it is too much maybe you can charge her a small fee to teach her some responsibility.
2007-11-14 17:49:14 · answer #9 · answered by Dana R 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She should have offered something to you by now. I pay my sister-in-law about $40 a week to watch our daughter only 3 days a week. It was less at one point because we were broke. I also get my sis-in-law and mom-in-law (because she helps too) little gifts here and there. Sometimes it's pretty soap, candles, or their favorite snack.
2007-11-13 18:41:09 · answer #10 · answered by Precious 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋