Why is my wife is treating me horribly since she got pregnant?

Question

Here's the deal - my wife became pregnant three months ago (she has wanted a kid FOREVER and always wanted to be a mother), and she was so happy and excited, and we celebrated all the first month; we cannot WAIT to be parents.

In the last month or so, she has been treating me horribly, even though I rub her back and feet, and go get her anything when she needs it at the store or around the house. She has also gotten a TON lazier...all she does is watch TV now on the couch, and I have to wake her up like 10 times to come to bed until like 2am everynight to get her to come upstairs so she doesnt sleep on the couch all night.

Her car is messier, and she leaves trash around everywhere now...is this an indication of what's to come? It's like she is falling apart.

She has been coming home from work, mad all the time, yelling at me over small things that I didn't do.

I know you women will say "She's just pregnant" but that doesn't give you a right to treat your husband like crap

doing dishes? ha...that would be a miracle...she doesnt do any housework as it is...she works a 40hr job, i work a 60hr job, and i still have to come home and do 100% of the housework.

it's definately her, we're going to get counseling, because she genuinely IS lazy. she was like this before being pregnant, just not to this extent. she's using the "pregnant" card to do whatever she wants and treat me horribly.

Answer 1

I'm pregnant and I don't act that way, so I'm not going to give you the "She's just pregnant" response. Granted she has tons more hormones and emotions right now but that doesn't give her any right to be mean and rude to you all of the time. I slip up and have a "moment" every now and then when I can be a bit snippy towards my husband but nothing like what you're saying. You need to sit down and talk to her about the way she's treating you and how it's affecting you. She may just not realize how bad she's gotten. Good luck.

Answer 2

No she isn't taking advantage of you, but she isn't being very considerate of you. She is pregnant, she doesn't have a major medical problem, she is having a baby. The more she does for herself the better the delivery will go. She needs to get active and move or she is going to have a terrible time. So don't make up anything to her, you did nothing wrong, if she can't get over it, then she needs to grow up.

Answer 3

Try not to take it so hard. Her body is going through alot right now. Things will go back to normal after she has the baby. Her hormones are going crazy right now, it's not her fault. I was the same way with my first baby. I would come home from work and sleep on the couch until my husband would wake me up to go to bed. Around 4 or 5 months she should feel a little better and have more energy.

Answer 4

Pregnancy hormones only make it easier to over react to situations or people that would already tick you off.

Its NOT and excuse to go balls out and be a bi*ch to everyone, most of all your childs father.

Sit her down, and be honest with her. Ask her what she's wanting, and do your best to facilitate it. If she just wants to be upset over everything let her, but tell her that you dont treat her with discrespect, and she shouldnt do the same to you.

Maybe she's scared, maybe she doesnt feel well, maybe she's overwhelmed with the house and work and pregnancy, whatever it is, tell her you want to support her, but you dont know how to what to do unless she tells you.

let her know that you appreciate her struggle and her hardship, but that it more than just effects you to be treated like crap, its harming your relationship.

If that doesnt help, call her father and talk with him. I know it sounds insane, but some times a talk from a parent who they get along well with can help a lot.

Answer 5

The first few months you can be really tired and I used to fall asleep at the drop of a hat, Your wifes hormones are all over the place so that's a hell of a good reason as her body is adjusting. Just be patient with her. Good luck.

Answer 6

Probably because she feels like crap. Being pregnant is not fun. Just keep rubbing her feet, and feeding her cravings, and after the baby is born she will be back to her normal self. The fact you are using the word "lazy" to describe a pregnant woman means you have no clue.

She shouldn't treat you badly, so you should talk to her calmly. Tell her you can tell she's having a hard time and what can you do to help her out. Hormones are crazy during pregnany so hers might ne making her very moodly and irritable.

Answer 7

She is tired and hormonal, you try carrying 15 extra pounds have to change everything and you retain water all the time. She is NOT LAZY she is preganant and she will probablly blame it on you but who wouldnt after you calling her lazy and complain about her messy car she shouldnt be like that but really she cant help it its hormones she is stressing whether she can ake care of a baby it happens to all women knowing that something is growing inside of them and they have their childs life in their hands she is probably afraid to sleep incase something wierd happens. Its normal to be this way it will go away but if i were you i wold read up on some daddy to be books just to knwo what your in for in can get worse just watch what you say and be supportive of her but if she starts doing something that can hurt the baby like smoking drinking or eating fish then stop her but like i said she is bloated , retaining water, her back hurts and she is tired most woman are like this when they get pregnant it will change I promise

Answer 8

Its just hormones. I did the same thing. Im so tired and lazy now, and dont want to do anything or even be touched!!

Answer 9

Her hormones are raging, right now. It isn't you. It is her. The nicest person can become a raving (:') ) maniac in this time. This is where a husband must lose his selfishness (not that you are selfish) and think of her.

Answer 10

Wow...

You'll never know how draining it is to be pregnant...

You'll never know how positively homicidal women with petty little husbands with no sensitivity can get...(or maybe you will)

You'll never know how crappy you feel in your first trimester...

You'll never know how stupid you sound bitching about her "messy car" and her getting "a TON lazier"

She is Pregnant (and there's nothing "just" about it)

Stop complaining, be supportive, ....she'll snap out if it and become a nympho in just a few weeks...

Growing a baby, takes work, some women deal with it better than others...and some women have it a whole lot harder then others...

But one thing that DEFINITELY WON'T help her situation or the manner in which she treats you....is having to listen to you whine about her being mean.

Step back and get some perspective...

You had sex and then your life went on as usual...

For her....

Her hormones went crazy...

Just the smell of your shampoo, the dusty carpet, the BBQ down the street is making her want to barf into her purse

She's starving and totally nauseous and disgusted at the same time...

She's thrilled and terrified at the same time

She's worried every minute that the baby is ok

The last thing she needs is this...try to suck it up and a man and be supportive of her...let her get her rest while she can and if you want a change in her behavior...

Stop complaining and clean up yourself...she'll probably faint.

Then come home with flowers and then cook dinner (nothing too smelly)...

Go buy yourself a few books...

Not only will she be impressed...but you might get a clue to what you're in for.

http://www.amazon.com/Dads-Survival-Guide-Man-Man/dp/0316159956/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1194994174&sr=1-1

http://www.amazon.com/Fathers-First-Steps-Things-Should/dp/155832335X/ref=pd_bbs_sr_2?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1194994174&sr=1-2

http://www.amazon.com/Father-Knows-Best-Dads-Be/dp/0789208245/ref=sr_1_6?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1194994174&sr=1-6


****OMG Whaaaaa...listen to you. You're going to choose NOW to address the fact that your wife is a lousy house keeper...especially when you knew this already? She's friggin pregnant...and you're going to drag her in to counseling about vacuuming??? Jesus Christ...Makes me thankful for my husband...he's a grown up...thanks for reminding me.

You're going to lose your mind when the baby comes....lol