i have a 4 year old daughter and her father is in jail for stabbing someone and wants to see her and share joint custody!! he was never much of a father to her and he has been gone for 3 years and 6 months!!!! im not with him and i dont think he should be able to see her! its was his choice to go to jail not hers!!!! she doesnt even know him!! she calls my boyfriend of 3 years daddy!!! what is the best choice here?
2007-11-13 06:13:19 · 6 answers · asked by wnzlncl 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I think you of all people know what's best for your child. I don't think that environment (correctional facility) is one children should be subjected to at such a young age. Depending on how long he is in there for he might try to contact her when she's older and can understand the situation.
2007-11-13 06:17:58 · answer #1 · answered by shae 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You had a new live-in boyfriend after just 6 months? You didn't say how long the girl's father was going to be in prison, but some day he will be out and you will have to deal with the situation. Let her father pursue visitation, through the courts. Keep in mind, one day your daughter will ask, or find out, the man she calls Daddy is not her father. Be prepared to justify your lie, and don't be surprised if she resents you and your boyfriend. Sooner or later, she will seek out her biological father. Honesty is always the best course.
2007-11-13 14:57:39 · answer #2 · answered by Cecil n 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It might really cause a rift if you introduce a new dad now. If she is happy and in a stabilized environment, you don't want to disrupt that. I dealt with a similar situation, but my daughter's father wasn't in jail, he was just a loser who didn't want to see her regularly. I finally pulled the plug, and as far as we're concerned, he doesn't exist. It was better for her well-being in the long run. She calls my boyfriend of 3 years Daddy also, and we have a 2-year old together. So we have our family unit that is very stable, and is the best environment for my daughter.
So I think your daughter's father might have a negative impact on her life and she is probably better off without him.
2007-11-13 14:34:57 · answer #3 · answered by Aubrey A 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
This one can be tricky. By law he has every right to see his daughter, but what judge or lawyer would agree with your child going to see their dad in prison for stabbing someone? If he is so hell bent on seeing her, let him figure it out. Your daughter is the victim because of his stupidity she won't know her biological father. That's not your fault.
2007-11-13 14:18:02 · answer #4 · answered by Nikki 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not introduce her to some stranger and tell her that he is her dad. That would totally screw up her world. He can write to her and color her pictures and send to her but that is it! You don't even have to let her see the letters or pictures right now but put them up for her for later because she will appreciate it when she is old enough.
2007-11-13 14:24:04 · answer #5 · answered by Shalene C 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Let him take it to court and pray the state does not allow him to see her! Good luck!
2007-11-13 14:17:47 · answer #6 · answered by MJ 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋