My son is in third grade. He's a twin and he and his sister were born prematurely. His emotional growth has always trailed a bit which my husband and I believe is pretty common in premature babies.
My son really struggles with personal responsibility in general. This year, in third grade, his teachers have stopped babying him. Last year, the last 2 six week he was on A honor role. The first six weeks this year all C's and one A. He hadn't been bring home his work so I emailed his teacher. Apparently he isn't doing his classwork.
I really don't know what to do because he is completing his homework. I like the fact that his teacher this year isn't holding his hand but he's not getting it. He is 8 years old and is capable of being a responsible for completing and turning in his classwork.
Does anyone have any similar experiences they could share to assist my husband and I in helping him? Please don't leave a comment if you aren't serious. We really appreciate your help.
2007-11-13 03:10:29 · 15 answers · asked by enigma 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
My son did the same thing until I sat him down and told him that if he doesn't start getting his work done then I will personally sit with him all day holding his hand and embarassing him in front of the whole school. I only had to go up there one day and he got the message. I don't know if it will work for you but you can try it and see.
2007-11-13 03:21:28 · answer #1 · answered by christina h 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I teach 3rd grade, and personal responsibility is THE biggest problem kids face in the grade level. You're right- the teachers don't hold their hands as much as in the past. However, we (teachers and parents) should at least be there to guide them through making such a big transition. This year I got tired of trying to keep up with students who didn't complete their work on time. It was too much work for me for something they should be responsible for. My solution was simple- I gave each student an "incomplete classwork" folder. Anything they don't get finished during class goes into the folder. If they have a bit of spare time throughout the day, they can pull out the work and work on it. If it's not done by the end of the day, it's homework. If I don't get it the next day, I don't bother trying to chase it down. It's helped. This might be something you could talk to his teacher about. If she's up to the idea, he'll see that he still has to complete the work (which will take up play time at home). At this age, a lot of kids don't care if they get a zero because it doesn't mean anything to them...until the report card comes out. By then it's too late. Does he have an assignment book? As a teacher, nothing frustrates me more than a parent asking if I'll write down the assignments each day for their child. In 3rd grade, THEY write down the assignments themselves. I write the assignments on the board and on a poster so there's no excuse. However, I also check their assignment books at the end of the day to make sure they've written everything down. I initial the assignment, and parents are expected to do the same. Since he's doing his homework, the assignment book would be a good way to keep track of the missing classwork as well (assuming she allows him to take it home).
If that's not an option, you can ask that he be given time limits. Sometimes that motivates students to beat the clock rather than daydream. You can also ask that he have a responsible buddy who helps keep him on task.
You'll be amazed at the difference in your son's maturity now and how it will be after Christmas. Third grade is a really fun grade to see such a transition. It's tough now, but it'll get better. Best wishes!!
2007-11-13 10:29:15 · answer #2 · answered by elizabeth_ashley44 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Go to school and pick him up at the classroom door each day for a while, and check with his teacher to see if he has any classwork or homework for the day.(kids don't like for their parents to come to school). If he does, get it and
when you get home let him play for a while and after dinner
tell him it's time to do his homework.
Sit down with him and help him if he has a problem with it.
Encourage him. When he gets answers right tell him he did a good job. Don't belittle him when he gets one wrong.
The child need encouragement and praise.
It will help him to want to do his work.
Remember Honey gets more flies than vinegar.
Also give him a chore or two to do AND an allowance when he does them and no allowance when he doesn't.
2007-11-13 03:27:20 · answer #3 · answered by suzie 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
8 years old is a little young to be dropped out on the streets.
He needs to be doing his classwork and his homework so that he will learn. He will not learn by not doing it. Whatever it takes, the work needs to be done (even if it means holding his hand)
As he gets older, things such as grades start meaning more to him. (many schools give out "S" and "U" grades until the 3rd grade) You can encourage him by giving him short term goals. Every classwork brought home with a good grade might get a star on the Fridge, or a dollar, or a new toy (depending on how desperate you become)
2007-11-13 03:25:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Have a discipline system and stick to it. Take away the luxuries like TV or playing games. I have an 8 year old 3rd grader also. When she isn't being responsible in school, she is punished by having those taken away.
2007-11-13 03:15:17 · answer #5 · answered by jmiller 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What is he doing in class when he is supposed to be doing work? Find out from the teacher exactly what he does. My daughter had similar symptoms that led us to test for ADHD. It may not be that, but perhaps it is something you have missed. Ask the school counselor to observe him at different times of day for a few days and report findings to you. You can ask the teacher to send home the work he has not completed in class to finish at home. Maybe once he has to do work instead of watch tv, play or whatever fun thing he would normally do, he will learn that it is easier to get it done at school and not miss out on the fun.
2007-11-13 03:38:05 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
Yes I think he is old enough to assume personal responsibility. He needs to realize that everyone - not just him - has to be responsible for their lives and what they must do or adverse effects will result.
Try to show him by not performing YOUR responsibilities for a day (on a weekend if you aren't daring enough to do it on a weekday lol). Let him see what chaos can ensue. I think he may be a little too young to say...if you dont't do your classwork, your educational develeopment will be compromised, you'll never end up in a decent college and will get a dead end job and....just try shirking your responsiblility and let him get an eyeful (^_^).
2007-11-13 03:18:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
You have to establish with him that he MUST do what is expect of him and if he doesn't there will be repercussions. Take all his "toys" away. TV, stereo, vidio games, everthing! Don't give anything back until there is improvement! Stick to your guns on this or it just won't do any good.
2007-11-13 03:28:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
no trouble with home work hmmmm, where does he sit in class, ask the teacher to move him to the front of the class, spend a few hours volunteering in the classroom, something is distracting him, find out what it is
2007-11-13 04:21:21 · answer #9 · answered by melissa s 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
The only thing I could think is if you take him by homeless people and explain to him that they probably didn't do there homework and if he doesn't do his homework he might end up like that. We also sent a note book to school with our daughter and the teacher had to sign it everyday telling us about that she has homework and if they had any problems at school. If she didn't bring her homework home she got toys taken away or she got grounded. You would have to figure out what works best for your child. My mom offered $5 for every A we had on our report card
Hope that helps you
2007-11-13 03:30:08 · answer #10 · answered by Alice F 2 · 0⤊ 5⤋