I always feel like i dont belong in my family. help.?

Question

my dad has a huge family and all of them are known for something. my cousin was in sports illustrated and everyone is REALLY good at something im always just there. like last christmas every one had at least four gifts. there i was, i had none everyone forgot about me again. i always feel like im pressured to be perfect. be a doctor..have a great life blah blah blah. it always seems like my mom tries to pick on me in front of my family like a bad grade or im irresponsible. can someone please help tell me if m exagrating or is it for real. also do i belong? and when will i not feel like this? is it just like a stage or something ya know the teen years? haha someone help...

Answer 1

you know you have too pray and say sorry too your mom and dad so your gonna be like them

Answer 2

probably just a stage you are going through. Develop some new interests - painting, singing, dancing, knitting - something new for you. I can't believe that you didn't even get one present at Christmas. Your family can't be that big.
I was a middle child in a family of 8 kids and when I was a teen I felt that way too. But when I got older I grew out of it. Sometimes it is better to keep a low profile anyway. But really, talk to your parents and tell them how you feel. I'm sure that they love you and they will reassure you that you are indeed part of the family. See if you can spend some alone time with your dad and your mom - go for walks with them, or help your mom in the kitchen. You have to make the first move. You don't have to be like them and be known for something great. That will happen as you get older. Find out what you are interested in and get into it. Good luck and I wish you the best.

Answer 3

There is no way I can tell if you are exagerating, or even lying about the things you have said. I do know that there is something that is not right for this subject to even be discussed.
There has to be a reason why you didn't get presents for christmas. I am not saying it is you, I don't know anything about you or your family.

Probably the best thing for you to do is to confide with either a religious person if you go to church, or maybe a school conselor. They would have a much better chance to determine what is going on. Good Luck.pp

Answer 4

if you feel this way maybe you should talk to your parents about it they may not know that you feel left out!. when you r in that situation it seems that nothing you do is right or that if you were more like your cousins that they would like you more. When you r a teenager you go through lots of moments like this and some times it just goes away, other times it needs attention. if you try and talk to your parents and share how u feel without blaming them and they still wont listen then maybe talk to a school counsellor(they helped me deal with the same feelings)they should be able to help you get pass this. But ALWAYS remember you do belong and even though at times you may not feel as loved as others you are special.

Answer 5

Well I heard people go through a stage like this in their teen years on some show :P. Depends if you actually have bad grades and stuff like they say, because if you don't, then what is the problem with being a doctor or something lke that? If you are feeling left out of the family, just talk toyour parents. They just might not notice (if they don't that's bad news). Good luck, I hope it works out for you.

Answer 6

Teens very often feel this way, and they are not always wrong about their relative status in a family. I never felt that I belonged to my family, and left home at the age of 17. Parents do have favorites, and it shows even when they try to hide it. Also, younger children in huge families have a lot of competition. Try to focus on friends rather than family, and do something like get a job to get yourself out of the house on a "respectable" basis.
Jobs are a good place to make friends, and the extra money always helps.

Answer 7

Might be you might be depressed or anything. Talk to a physician or counselor. You DO belong together with your pals and household. Go get that job at the bank. Also, find something that makes you blissful. Besides consuming, you 21 12 months historic! ;) Sorry. Had to make slightly joke to try and lighten the temper. Say you love... Speaking a foreign language. Join a international language membership! You're definite to fell you belong there!

Answer 8

You mean no one got you anything at all.I would say that is pretty rude.Even your Mom should not pick on you no matter who is there.What are you doing with your life.Are you still in school and doing good?Do you or can you get a job?A lot of people do good in life and you are still in your teen years and will have time to decide what you want to do with your life.They probably tease you so you will do better in life even though that is the wromg way to go about it.Try not to take it to heart.They probably don't realize that you are hurt by this.Just do the best you can and show them all one day

Answer 9

I can relate 100%~~story of my life.

I am an adult and I've always been belittled by my father/mother.

I am considered the shame/disappointment of the family. Their expectations of children are set too high. I come from an Ivy-League family and I am the only one who hasn't finished college. I am in my thirties.

My mother is the main contributor to bad mouthing me. Now that I am an adult, I mostly have written her off. When we do speak, it's about topics that have nothing to do with our relationship or what she usually has expected of me all of my life. I don't have to worry about the bull anymore. It's passe and it stays passe. If she brings up sensitive topics, I stop her in her tracks and tell her, "I appreciate your input, Mom, but that's not something I wish to discuss and we can talk about other things other than this particular subject". She gets the hint and without a word to respond, automatically switches subjects.

You'll learn how to do this through your growing years and with some more life experiences.

For the most part, I don't really have much to do with her or that side of the family. Those members of the family are thoroughly critical and judgmental ba$tard$ and don't believe that my life is of benefit by enduring the bull that they take delight to throw my way. My opinion, of course, but it's worked out in my favor, so far. Because of this, my self-confidence has soared.

By the way: I have spoken to her about my hurt feelings in the past. She'll walk away letting me know that it doesn't exist with her. A slap in the face, but what hasn't killed me has made me stronger.

You must adopt a strong character and wit with people like these. Not a very helpful road that they've paved for you. You need to take care of yourself and not depend upon them.

Take care.

Answer 10

You didn't get any Christmas presents? Well as long as you know you are good at school and you are responsible, you need to have respect for yourself. As for family, unfortunately there isn't much you can do. Just know that this is where you have to live and this is what you have to deal with for now and when you grow up you'll be your own person. Now you'll know to treat your kids better. I'm really sorry that sounds like a pretty upsetting thing to go through. The best thing is just to not let it get to you and stop feeling sorry for yourself.

Answer 11

I feel really bad for your situation. Sometimes, for unknown reasons, a family member turns into the 'black sheep' of the family. When this is the case, you need to take care of yourself as best as you can, even if your family does not. Also, seek close friends outside of your family, often times we are more like our friends than we are like our family members. We can choose the personalities of our friends that we get along with the best, but we don't have choices over who our family is.

It sounds as though you work hard to be a good person. Chase after sucess for yourself, and not for your family. Someday you will be able to look back and know you did well, even when you lacked familial support, it will be something to be very proud of. The best I can say, is to assure you that you will not spend much of your life as a kid. Most of your life is as an adult, and you will be one soon if you want to or not. But, as an adult you will spend less time with family, and possibly you will appreciate them more and they you more. My point is, hold in there, you have a great life in front of you and lots of choices that will be only yours to make, don't make them to impress a family who seems to ignore you, make them to find what will make you happy and successful by your own terms, and then find friends who do notice you and think highly of you. As an adult, you will choose to live with those who value you and don't ignore you!