the five questions feared most by men?

Question

The 5 questions most feared by men are: 1...What are you thinking about? 2...Do you love me? 3...Do I look fat? 4...Do you think she is prettier than me? 5...What would you do if I died?

What makes these questions so difficult is that every one is guaranteed to explode into a major argument if the man answers incorrectly(i.e., tells the truth).

As a public service, each question is analyzed below, along with possible Responses.

Question # 1: What are you thinking about?

The proper answer to this, of course, is: "I'm sorry if I've been pensive, dear. I was just reflecting on what a warm, wonderful, thoughtful, caring, intelligent woman you are, and how lucky I am to have met you." This response obviously bears no resemblance to the true answer,which most likely is one of the following: a...Baseball. b...Football. c...How fat you are. d...How much prettier she is than you. e...How I would spend the insurance money if you died.

Perhaps the best response to this question was offered by Al Bundy, who once told Peg, "If I wanted you to know what I was thinking, I would be talking to you!"

Question # 2: Do you love me?

The proper response is: "YES!" or, if you feel a more detailed answer is in order, "Yes, dear." Inappropriate responses include: a...Oh Yeah, crap loads. b...Would it make you feel better if I said yes? c...That depends on what you mean by love. d...Does it matter? e...Who, me?

Question # 3: Do I look fat?

The correct answer is an emphatic: "Of course not!" Among the incorrect answers are: a...Compared to what? b...I wouldn't call you fat, but you're not exactly thin. c...A little extra weight looks good on you. d...I've seen fatter. e...Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died.

Question # 4: Do you think she's prettier than me?

Once again, the proper response is an emphatic: "Of course not!" Incorrect responses include:

a...Yes, but you have a better personality. b...Not prettier, but definitely thinner. c...Not as pretty as you when you were her age. d...Define pretty. e...Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died.

Question # 5: What would you do if I died?

A definite no-win question.(The real answer, of course, is "Buy a Corvette and a Boat"). WARNING: No matter how you answer this, be prepared for at least an hour of follow-up questions, usually along the these lines:

WOMAN: Would you get married again? MAN: Definitely not! WOMAN: Why not-don't you like being married? MAN: Of course I do. WOMAN: Then why wouldn't you remarry? MAN: Okay, I'd get married again. WOMAN: You would? (with a hurtful look on her face) WOMAN: Would you sleep with her in our bed? MAN: Where else would we sleep? WOMAN: Would you put away my pictures, and replace them with pictures of her? MAN: That would seem like the proper thing to do. WOMAN: And would you let her use my golf clubs? MAN: She can't use them; she's left-handed WOMAN: - - - silence - - - MAN: Oh ( expletive deleted).

amar and seanab its a joke.no need to get so touchy.

amar and seanab its a joke.no need to get so touchy.

Answer 1

How I would "like to" answer
1) ...If I wanted you to know I'd be talking.
2) yea sure
3) Don't worry about it
4) ..huh?...did you say something...oh...which one?
5) Go to your funeral

What I would say
1) Our future
2) More than life itself
3) No your perfect
4) (Without looking at the other girl) No one is prettier then you.
5) I would die of a broken heart ;(

Answer 2

I will try to analyse the five questions which the men are said to fear most one by one.
There is no question of being afraid to tell about what you have been thinking.To think is a prerogative of all human beings. Now what one has been thinking depends upon various factors. I do not think if one is pensive or thinking about some silly thing such as football match or cricket match there is a need to hide this.
Now coming to the second question about loving someone or not. The main issue is that do you love yourself. if the answer is YES then it is automatically answered YES. But one can not love the other person all the times. The state of loving someone is continuously altering from loving more to less loving.
Coming to the third question of telling the other person if he/she is fat or not. if one is fat then i think there is no harm in telling the truth in a loving manner.
The question of telling about someone about being prettier or not. can also be answered in the same spirit.
Now the last question is trickier to answer, as till such time the question is being asked one can only speculate about the answer. In such a situation, I prefer to tell a joke. The joke is about Mullah Nasirruddin's wife asking him the same question again & again. He said dear may be I will go mad if you ever died. The wife asked with some concealed happiness " I think you will marry again? Mulla said," Dear, I would not get that mad either." I think it answers the feelings behind such questions.

Answer 3

Cute joke---love the way she led up to the final big question and caught him red handed!

Answer 4

Haha!

Answer 5

almost exact. there are two more questions feared my men, but im not telling u. plus one of the questions doesnt scare me

Answer 6

Pmsl!!!! My hubby runs for cover if I ask any of those, sometimes I do it just for fun, lol.

Answer 7

we fear them cuz we can't lie to people we care about and so we tell the truth or think alot before lying. it's quite cotradictory to common belief

Answer 8

feared most by men or feared by most men
not the same thing darling
good one though....thnx

Answer 9

Hahahaha. He's cheating on her already.

Answer 10

what a load of rubish......dont put all men in the same basket......im sure a lot of men out there dont fit you criterea.....and i and they resent what you are saying......seamanab