my brother is gay and......?

Question

he doesnt know i know. he has been gay for about 9 years, and my parents are strongly against it (they are devout catholics), they finally told me last year. im fourteen now, and my brother and i have each other as "friends" on myspace. i saw some pics of him and this guy. they were holding each other, and there were some comments about "oh im so happy for you guys" and what not. on his page it says he is in a relationship and he wears a ring on his left ring finger. i am practically convinced he is in a relationship with this guy. my brother shares more with me now than he ever did before. now knowing this information, i feel like a liar. and when my parents ask me "hows lucas" (my brother = lucas) i feel totally dishonest. they dont judge him or hate him because hes gay, but they dont approve either. i dont know if i should tell them or keep it to myself. am i making a mountain out of a mole hill? i dont know. please, tell me what you think and thanks sooo much! =D

Answer 1

You are too sweet to think that deeply for your families feelings, that is the first step. It sounds as if your parents already know your brother is gay since they told you, but if your brother doesn't know you know maybe you could talk to him about it on alone time with him....not randomly at a family dinner meal or in the middle of something else public with friends/family..ask somewhere where it is just the two of you and be open to what he has to say since your asking him. Good luck!

Answer 2

Maybe you could ask your brother about his relationship seeing as it is on his page. See how that goes. Maybe he will tell you what is going on, maybe not. Maybe you could also talk to your parents and explain that you feel uncomfortable about how things are now (that they told you about your brother but he doesn't know you know, and then they ask you how he is, and that doesn't help). Do you have other brothers or sisters who know about it too who can help you? It is a lot for you to keep to yourself and hopefully your family can help you with this. If they are all adults, you should not feel guilty about what they do or do not talk about or tell each other, even though it might not seem like it. Good luck, hope things get easier for you.

Answer 3

Your parents already know about your brother being gay. In fact they told you about it last year. Are you going to tell them about your brother's possible relationship with a guy? What good will it do if you do tell them?

Your letter seems to say that your brother has not disclosed to you the matter of his being gay. Can it be that he is embarrassed about it? Or maybe he is not truly gay as your parents think!

There is no real need for you to tell your parents. As long as your brother strives to make you believe that he is not gay, then that's all that you have to tell them.

Answer 4

first, your aren't even sure if your brother is gay.
don't be rash unless you have confirmed that he is.
well, IF he is, then ask for his consent on whether he wants your parents' to know.
if not, let this matter rest and don't let it bother you ever again.
just take your brother as he is a normal person. a normal boy. not a gay.
you'll get over it soon.
and, i don't think you should tell your parents. but, you parents will still find out sooner or later by judging his bahaviour at home. (whether he is being closer to you or your dad at home)
that would be pretty obvious if he is gay.
anyways, like i said before, don't let this matter bother you.
you would feel that a great burden has been lifted off your back.
try it, it works!
take cares,
Wendy=)

Answer 5

Tell your brother you have been told by your parents. Then let him know that you are fine with the information. By all means tell your parents that your brother is fine and happy. It sounds to me as if the folks may not approve of the situation, but they do still love their son.

Answer 6

Has your brother told u that he is gay yet? Maybe you should confront him first and get a definate answer before worrying about what to do next. Its good to hear that you dont have a problem with it. But, i think you should definately let your brother tell your parents of this, because when your parents do find out, and if they dont react to well, he is going to need support, and that is when he is going to need you. If you tell them then he isnt going to feel like you are there for him. But talk to your brother, see if he is actually gay and then talk about what he intends on doing about telling your parents.
Good luck =)

Answer 7

Telling them won't help anyone in this situation, it will be harder for all parties involved. It will upset your parents, and besides that ---you and your brother will have a strained relationship if you do. The best thing is to let your brother let your parents know on his own.

Answer 8

It is your brother's right to tell people when and if he chooses. When he feels the time is right, he will tell your parents. For now, it's not your place; if you tell, you run a high risk of ruining the great relationship you guys have.
Just tell your parents that Lucas is good. That is the truth!!

Answer 9

You can tell them that he is fine without telling them anything else. What he tells you is his business and I would not repeat it to your parents. Don't feel guilty for not telling them everything. Since they do not approve Lucas probably does not want them to know anyway.

Answer 10

You are worrying about this way to much. Continue to have a relationship with your brother and leave it up to him to tell them.