She wants to stop this and has asked for my advice on how to do so. I have no idea what to tell her. Anyone have any suggestions?
2007-10-30 18:43:22 · 33 answers · asked by frenzy-CIB- Jim's with Jesus 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Most likely the thing that she is attracted to is not the fact of their atheism or agnostisism but rather their "badboy" image - The idea that they fly in the face of everything she was raised to believe. People like that can be exciting especially for young girls.
What she should do however is evaluate what life with these types of people would be like. It sounds as if she already has an inkling that these individuals are not good for her. They tend to be unstable, using the tag line of "free love" to justify multiple, disposable relationships. What would happen if there were any children? What would the two of them teach about God? Etc.
The biggest problem that most women have who continually date the same, wrong person in the guise of different men is they tend to meet them in the same ways and in the same places. To meet Christian men she can build a future with she needs to change the way she goes about looking for a significant other.
She should look at her dating habits, find the trends, then decide for herself why she is continually dating the same, wrong kind of guy.
2007-10-30 18:52:35 · answer #1 · answered by David M 6 · 4⤊ 4⤋
Do you have pony in this race?
Tell you Christian friend to read Paul beginning with 1 Cor 10:23-24. Paul is explicit about Christian and non Christian relationships.
As a Christian, we are to teach all nations, not convert everyone. If she shares her beliefs, she has done her job. He will believe or he won't.
Your friend relationship could lead to marriage. This is where the conflict comes in. Mixed beliefs usually affect what kind of home and environment there is for her children. Different religions mean confusion regarding which road to travel.
As far as attraction, the heart is a lonely hunter.
2007-10-30 19:17:59 · answer #2 · answered by J. 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
hm i like your point about widening the gap between atheist and theists with abortion etc.... i agree. anyways to answer your question, in my experience the atheist/christian rivalry exists mostly online.... in real life people dont go around announcing their beliefs all day so its not really as big of an issue... i have several atheist friends and we get on fine and dandy... until it comes to discussing topics that bring in our beliefs... we do some playful teasing, but it never gets too heated because we have respect for each other.... in regards to the online world, no i dont think we'll ever get along haha.... not on this site anyway! there is an atheist chat room i go to sometimes (i am christian btw) and ive earned respect there... but i really did have to earn it... most other christians that go in there get ripped apart straight away (theyre usually preaching tho, so fair enough i suppose).... it comes down to big headedness i think... when people learn to back down and try to understand and learn from others beliefs without going into defense, thennn we might be able to get along.
2016-04-11 04:36:46 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is kinda funny! It seems to me she thinks they are smart or maybe she likes the challenge, or maybe she likes to debate, or maybe she wants to be an atheist and has no courage to make the first move.
If she was my friend, I would say "what's wrong with that? Why dwell on that? Relax and enjoy your relationship no matter the religion. You don't have to change your belief if you don't want to, but keep in mind that he thinks differently. Set certain rules, like it is forbidden to be disrespectful to each other, and that's OK. If he accepts you the way you are, you can accept him the way he is. Ultimately, if you feel like changing your mind because of him, that's OK too. Talk to him, try to understand him, and if he makes sense, go for it."
I think it is possible that two people have a relationship with different beliefs, it is just a matter of being aware of it, being respectful and never expect too much from the other person (changing his/her way of thinking, for example), because that is impossible to happen.
Peace!
2007-10-31 07:17:48 · answer #4 · answered by Janet Reincarnated 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think the best thing you can do for your friend is pray with and for her. She knows what she should and should not be doing. I would tell her to go talk to her pastor or someone in the Church that she trusts. We as Christians are taught not to hate anyone so you can't hate the people she is attracted to but you do not have to associate with them. You could let her know that you will be pray for her but that you don't support her choice of men. Encourage her to hang around in groups that include people from your church so that she will be subjected to people who do believe in God. Most churches have lots of activities to keep all ages interested in church. Good luck.
2007-10-30 18:55:50 · answer #5 · answered by doglover 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Good things come from good choices. Bad things come from bad choices-no matter your circumstance.
Go all the way back to the beginning. God made Adam and Eve and put them in a garden. Most of the options they had were premium-"Do I want cantaloupe or grapes? Will I go for a walk or a swim?" Except for one. Right in the center of Eden, God placed a tree that served as a monument to the power of choice. He told them, "Everything in the garden is awesome. Enjoy it all-except the fruit of this one tree." And what did they do? They chose wrong and ate it anyway, and we've been spiraling from the consequences ever since.
It's best to date a christian guy if she wants to marry a christian guy. We have to think long term, because decisions we make now, will affect us in the future. If she's attracted to un-christian ones and allowes herself to date them, then she will most likely marry one like that. He will surely pull her down spiritually, and when there is no Christ in a relationship, it crumbles. That's why there is so much divorce now
God forgives our sins, when we ask Him to, But the seed of sin is already out there, and will grow. that's how we reap what we sow..
2007-10-30 19:18:40 · answer #6 · answered by hplyevr4evr 3 · 1⤊ 3⤋
Seems as if she enjoys what she considers the "bad boy" persona and/or feels like she can "fix" people she considers in need.
If she truly wants to alter her actions then she'll do so.
Right now she's just "thinking out loud".
Is it the case that she's attracted to sound reasoning and been exposed to understanding logical fallacy, consequently feeling her beliefs to be challenged?
2007-10-30 18:51:32 · answer #7 · answered by B C 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Well, shouldn't she consult someone who doesn't stalk us?
How is it she's only attracted to atheist and agnostic men? Wouldn't she have to get to know them before their beliefs become apparent?
2007-10-31 11:18:40 · answer #8 · answered by STFU Dude 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
its like (example) a good girl attracted to a bad boy, it lies in the mystery. its also like a forbidden fruit. i don't know how to help her, maybe if she studied their ideas or had some friends who are female and male who are atheist, maybe she'll get over it. maybe she'll she there's no difference between the male atheist and the female atheist (except obviously the gender).
2007-10-30 18:49:48 · answer #9 · answered by hello.2.u.2 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Like Mark Twain said,"The best way to deal with a temptation is to yield to it."Tell her to go ahead and find out herself first hand what does it entail to be friendly with an atheist/agnostic.What she has to lose which she wouldn't in another set of conditions?Nothing what so ever.Then let her go ahead and have a wonderful experience.That's life.
2007-10-30 19:27:05 · answer #10 · answered by brkshandilya 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋