LDS weddings question?

Question

I'm not LDS but I have had a few friends that are. I didn't know until I knew them that when 2 LDS people get engaged, they are supposed to get married at the temple and that, from my understanding, guests are not allowed.

I was just curious why guests are not allowed? Also, I heard that in an LDS wedding the ceremony isn't anything like a regular wedding. Is this correct? Please understand I am not judging the religion. I'm just curious. :)

Also 2 of my LDS friends chose to go to Salt Lake City to get married in the temple there. Is it considered better to get married there, or is it just as okay to get married at another temple?

Once again, I'm NOT one of the people that come on here and try to insult your religion. I'm not judging you. I just am curious about the differences between LDS things and my own Christian beliefs.

Thanks! :)

Thank you for the informative responses. I agree with one answerer, if you can't or don't want to answer the question, don't respond. I'm not LDS, and I do not plan to convert, but I like studying about other religions because I find it really interesting. My question was just for informational reasons only and if you cannot respect someone else's beliefs then you have no business answering the question.

Answer 1

No temple is considered "better" to be married in than another. Some people have a preference for which temple they like the best, based on aesthetics or experiences they have had there. They may also have had family in Salt Lake City.

For active LDS members, usually they are married in the temple, since we believe that if you are married by the power of God you will be sealed to each other even after . This is only done in the temple.

The reason "guests" are not allowed is simple. we believe the temple to be a place that is dedicated to God and should be kept clean, so those who attend their can feel his presence. Part of this is that we believe that God cannot dwell in the presence of unclean (unworthy) beings. So people who enter the temple should at a minimum have kept themselves free from (or repented of) certain serious sins and be trying to live their lives the best they can. If members want to enter the temple, they meet with their bishop and stake president and together determine if they think they are worthy and help to resolve any worthiness issues he/she may have.

Not only is the temple kept sacred, because it is the house of God, but it is because the temple is a place to make covenants with God. Thus, only those who believe are allowed to enter and make those covenants. Otherwise it is worthless and they will break them. On the surface, this may sounds arrogant, especially as I try to explain it on here, but I promise we do not feel like we are any better than other people, in fact we would love it if everyone was worthy and could enter the temple. I encourage you to ask either one of your friends, and they will be able to explain it better than I can on here.

As far as the ceremony, I don't really know what to say. I haven't been to a temple wedding ceremony. From what I hear, they are definitely more plain and focus on eternal love, and not just love in this life. I also hear they are brief. Again, your friends can explain it in more detail than I can on here. This was a very polite and intelligent question though. Thanks for asking it. I hope I helped a bit.

Answer 2

I haven't read any of the answers, but I'm sure your questions have been answered. However, I'll answer them too.

Guests are allowed, as long as they have a temple recommend. One of the qualifications to having a temple recommend is that you be LDS, although there are others.

It isn't like a traditional Christian ceremony in that there is no music, bridesmaids, large crowds of people, rings are not exchanged, no singing either. It's just a very simple ceremony. Everyone is in white - including the guests. The sealer - the person who marries them, and in our case seals them for time and all eternity, usually says a few words about marriage, and the sealing ordinance, then vows are exchanged (they don't write their own). Then the sealer invites the guests to greet the newly married couple. The 20 or so guests line up and congratulate the couple, give them a hug or a handshake (if they don't know one of them) and everyone leaves. The whole thing takes between 15 and 30 minutes.
A lot of couples like to get married in the Salt Lake temple. I've been to that one, and other than the historical value of it, I don't see the big deal of prefering it over any other.

Thanks for your honest questions. It's a pleasure to answer questions when you know someone's not going to go off the deep end. And thanks for coming to us with your questions. I'm a firm believer in going to the source when possible for information.

EDIT: treehse65 is on the right track, except that it doesn't cost any money to be married in the Salt Lake temple. Now the reception, well, that's expensive everywhere.

Answer 3

Getting married in the temple is vastly different than getting married in a "normal" wedding ceremony. When a couple chooses to get married in the temple they are choosing to be married for time and eternity, not just until death. The ceremony is a lot simpler and quicker than in a traditional ceremony. There are no bridesmaids or groomsmen, no music, no exchanging of rings. There are relatively few guests in attendance. Those that do attend the temple ceremony must be members of the church in good standing with a valid recommend. The couple is dressed in white, and the guests can either choose to wear white (as in traditional temple attire) or they can wear regular Sunday clothes. It depends on what the couple wants. The temple isn't like the meetinghouse where regular services are held on Sundays. Anyone is welcome to attend the Sunday services.

No temple is better than another. The ceremony is the same regardless of the LDS temple it is performed in. Getting married in the Salt Lake Temple is a sort of tradition for some people. In my family for example, everyone has been married in the Salt Lake Temple, but I've had friends get married in other temples in Utah, Idaho, Seattle, Atlanta, etc.

It doesn't cost anything to get married in the temple. A couple might just have to wait longer if they want to get married in a popular temple like Salt Lake. The reception is a totally different story... and everyone is welcome there!

Many couples who have friends or family that aren't LDS or who can't attend the temple ceremony choose to have a "ring ceremony" prior to the reception so that their families can participate. There is no standard format for a ring ceremony - pretty much whatever the couple decides upon because ring ceremonies aren't a part of a temple wedding.

Answer 4

Mormon temples are places where worthy members enter to make covenants with God. The marriage ceremony is the "crowning" ordinance. The "sealing rooms" (aka wedding rooms) have chairs along the sides for the guests. There's an altar in the middle and wall-sized mirrors on opposite sides.

The "sealer" (the person who performs the ceremony) talks to the couple and gives them council as he sees fit.

Next the couple kneels at the altar holding hands. The sealer performs the ordinance and the couple make promises. Every covenant has promises (that they commit to do) and blessings that result in keeping those promises. One of the promises is that they can be together forever as a couple and a family if they keep their end of the bargain.

After the ceremony, they're invited to kiss and exchange rings if they choose to do so. The guests were typical Sunday clothes. The Bride typically wears her wedding dress along with some other special temple clothing that are used in other ordinances in the Temple. The groom wears white clothes and similar temple clothing.

The ceremony lasts about 30 minutes typically. After which the guests usually greet the couple and the parents on their way out. The guests then go, put their shoes back on, and wait for them outside of the temple (which you'd be more than welcome to join them).

There is no hierarchy of temples. They are all the same and it just comes down to scheduling and personal preferences.

Hope that helps.

Answer 5

A couple is married or sealed for time and all eternity in the Temple. Because of the SACRED things that happen in the temple, only members that are worthy for a temple recommend are allowed inside. Not all members go into the temple.

To enter the temple you are first instructed as to what happens there. We are taught things, which are discussed in the scriptures. Again this is SACRED, not secret. We make promises with our Heavenly Father.

Since I don't know what your Christian beliefs are I don't know what the difference is between our Christian beliefs.

I was married in the Oakland CA Temple. My daughter was married in the San Diego Temple. My parents were in Salt Lake City. It doesn't matter which Temple.

It is hard for family and friends that can't attend. However, it would be confusing for them and distracting for those that are prepared to be there. When I got married, none of my husband's family were there. However, we KNEW we were getting married in the proper place.

Answer 6

If your daughter converts to LDS, and chooses to marry in the temple, and you aren't a member, then no, you cannot attend the actual ceremony. First, you must understand the sacred nature of the temple. It's not for show, it's not for worldy things, it is where we make covenants with God. IT is His house and He has set the standard of living for those who attend. There aren't "vows exchanged" like a typical wedding, because this is not a typical ceremony. It is better. There is no "walking down the isle", giving the bride away, or any of that. Basically, the couple kneels at the altar, across from one another and makes promises with each other and God. It's not "For" anyone else but those two and the Lord, really. Many couples do a ring ceremony, since that is not part of the temple ceremony, and the parents/family can be a part of that. Consider this - SINCE it is important to your daughter... should you be supportive? I would hope so. My dad nor any of his family were at my temple sealing. They did not care to be there anyways, because they don't believe in what I do. I guess what you have to realize is, the wedding isn't for you, it's for your daughter and her spouse. That might sound harsh and I am sorry, but it is true. The wonderful thing is, anyone who abides the standards the Lord has set CAN come to the temple. Maybe you should see why she wants to convert... the gospel is a wonderful thing.

Answer 7

The temple is a scared place, we as L.D.S. have to follow the rules to be able to go into a temple too. Only about half of the active members have a temple recommend ourselves. A temple recommend is a card that we get from our Bishop that we are living worthy to be in the literal house of God.
As far as being different, maybe a little, we believe we can be married forever. There are a few things other than that too that are different maybe but I think its rare to see two weddings that are the same any way. Most L.D.S. have receptions for the family and friends that cannot be in the Temple with them. Just sort of look at like they are running off and getting eloped if you have a good friend that is getting married.
As far as the Salt Lake Temple, no it is not special except in the fact that it has history. Any temple has the same ordnance's.

Answer 8

The temple is considered the most sacred place on earth. Only good standing members are allowed in because it is considered so holy. Many members cant even go in because they are struggling with some issues.
When one gets married in the temple it is for time and all eternity. It is an eternal sealing of marriage.

A lot of people like the Salt Lake Temple because its the oldest and considered one of the prettiest. It is more of a traditional thing. Here in southern ca, a lot of people I know choose to get married in the San Diego temple because it kind of looks like a fairy tale castle and they like having that as their wedding pic backgrounds. It really doesnt matter which temple you are married in though.

Most people have the sealing, which is actually really short, and then have a reception for their friends and family members that couldnt go to the sealing.

guests are allowed to view the wedding, or sealing, but they must be temple recommend holders and its usually a small group limited to close family and friends


Getting married, sealed, in the temple is free, not expensive. You just might have to put yourself on a longer waiting list for a time available if you go to the SLC temple.



Michael
if you cant really answer the question then why dont you just stay out of it

Answer 9

Evan though I am LDS I got married to a guy who wasnt a member of the LDS church{but now he is} and we never got married in the LDS temple because both of us didnt want any arguements between families and because my husband wasnt a member then. We considered that what goes on inside the temple is very sacred to us and we treat the temple and the things we do in the temple with respect. Have you ever considered asking the missionaries of the LDS church all about the temple or have you ever thought about taking the missioary decusions? You might be surprised on what they might have to say. I hope this helps.

Answer 10

You got a lot of good answers. I just want to add one thing that no one touched on really- and that is what you said in your first paragraph about how we are supposed to be married in the Temple. That is actually not the case- we are encouraged to and most active LDS want to be married in the temple. There are those however who, for whatever reason choose not to be married in the temple. They are still allowed full activity in the church. Temple marriage is by no means a requirement, it just make sense if you are LDS and believe all the Doctrine to choose to be married that way.

I am getting married in January and I will get married in the temple in the town I live in.