On the issue of Transgender relationships?

Question

First of all i would like to start by saying that by transsexual i do not mean a transvestite or a drag queen (people who simply dress up as the opposite gender for whatever reason, but live their day to day life in the gender they were born in) but i do mean actualy transgender person. Aka a person with a real medical condition whereby they feel since when they were a child that they were born into the wrong body, and when they don't seek treatment it often either ends with a suicide or a serious mental break down. Or individuals who are born intersexed (aka with no clear male or female genetal, in which case the parents are usually asked to choose the child's gender, and the child usually either accepts it for life or rebels against it later).

Ok so now that this is sorted for the actual question. I watched a documentary on television about transgender people, dealing with their personal relationships, and how their transition affected/affects their loved ones. To be continued...

And that got me thinking, so say if a man and a woman get married, have children together and then suddenly one of them 'comes' out and says that they simply cannot live this lie a day longer and they have to undergo a transition to become the gender they feel they really are. But the couple still decides to stay together, because apart from that issue they pretty much have a perfect, loving relationship, and also they swore before God to always be together through thick and thin, health and sickness. Is it a sin or not for them to stay together? Yes everyone around them will now see them as a gay couple, but they were married as a straight couple, and have a family together. The physical attraction may not be there anymore, and maybe even the sex won't be there anymore (like for one of the couples they showed in the programme) but there is still love and desire to spend the rest of their lives together. What are your thoughts on this?

Answer 1

I'm in exactly that position.
I'm a transsexual lesbian; before I accepted that and sought treatment, I was already married, and have a daughter. My family are still together; my OH, and my daughter, love me for WHO I am, not what I am.
No matter which religion one follows, love is never a sin.

["Deirdre H"; I have to disagree with you. 'Transsexual' and 'transgender' are not the same thing; transsexual people are not 'transgender']

Answer 2

The issue is very complicated. We do have a lot of abuse in our society directed at people who are different. God is not an abuser. God is a good and a very moral God. God would mainly be concerned, with whether the couple was contributing positively to this world. To do this they would first have to do well as a couple. The key to any relationship is, whether the necessary energy is put into it, to nurture it and make it grow, Understanding someone with complex sexual identity issues, would require even more work in a relationship. The as a couple, they would have some unique insight into relationships, that could most likely be used to help others.

Answer 3

She is a WOMAN not a Transgendered Woman. Just treat her as you would any other woman. Don't seek her out because she was born with transsexualism, because if you do then you are a chaser. If you do have a relationship and she wants to talk about her private medical history then she will tell you, other wise it's none of your business.

Answer 4

It's not a sin.

Two people fall in love with each other; the body is only a part of who they are.

By the way .... drag queens, transvestites, cross-dressers, transsexuals are ALL transgendered. The people you are talking about are considered transsexual. Transgender refers to all of these, transsexual refers to those who feel they were born in the wrong body and seek to "fix" the condition through surgery.

I'm transsexual, and am currently living with my former spouse. We don't have a sexual relationship, and don't sleep in the same room. We have two children together, and this is the best way that we can support our kids. Things work as room-mates, and we are fair friends.

I also have some friends who managed to stay together in a loving relationship. I have tremendous respect for them. It's certainly not sinfull.

Answer 5

I know a few couples where one or both of the partners are transgendered, and I know two that are pretty much exactly as you describe. My thought, quite honestly, is that they're happy together. If I had a husband who suddenly told me he was transgendered, I'm not sure I could continue in a marriage with her, but I hope I'd be supportive. As for any sin involved - honestly it beats me. When there is no harm coming to any of the participants, I incline towards keeping my cute little button nose out of things.

Answer 6

What are you suggesting is a seeming paradox in Christian doctrine. But the real truth is this...no human being can tell you what is truly right or wrong in this situation. Earnestly seek God by praying, fasting and reading the Bible. Do so humbly and petition the Lord for an answer and have faith in what you receive.

Answer 7

It is not for me to judge other people. If I met someone in a situation like this, I would show them compassion, just like any one else.

If I were in this situation, I would not know what to do. I would always love the other person, but I don't know if I would remain in the relationship in the same way. I think I would pray for God to show me what the right thing to do would be. I would encourage my loved ones to show compassion and pray for the other person as well.

Answer 8

I don't really think living like that falls under any particular sin. The transgen will probably be much better off living with someone who truly cares for and and accepts them as they are.

Answer 9

i vote with diane-not my business--smile and enjoy the night--good question-still not my business

Answer 10

Eww.