We (bride and groom) take pictures with wedding party SEPERATELY starting at 6pm. The ceremony starts at 7pm. I want to meet him in the garden outside of the chapel to "steal" a moment alone with him around 15 min before ceremony starts. Plus, I want our photographer to capture our looks of surprise ( or disappointment ha ha) when we first see each other. Is that so wrong? Am I messing up tradition? No mean or stupid answers, i am serious.
2007-10-30 15:12:44 · 35 answers · asked by sweetsfromdat817 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Did i not say no mean answers????
2007-10-30 15:19:43 · update #1
Dang!! What does being a virgin have to do with this?? Jeez people.
2007-10-30 15:51:42 · update #2
I think this is a question that shouldn't have to be asked. Who cares if you see each other before the wedding. If your marriage is doomed it won't be because of you breaking a tradition. It sounds like this is what you want so go for it and do it and be happy. You aren't messing up a tradition. You just aren't following it exactly. It's okay to do that.
2007-10-30 15:19:55 · answer #1 · answered by Rockit 6 · 7⤊ 0⤋
It's really up to you. Waiting to see the bride until the ceremony is not done in some cultures. In some cultures, it is tradition for the bride and groom to meet just before the ceremony. Most Western brides see it as custom to wait. There is no right or wrong.
*However*, if you will not be seeing each other until just before the ceremony anyway, you might want to ask yourself why you're not going all the way. Why not have his first glance at you as he is in shock as you glide down the aisle? Most guys say this moment takes their breath away. There is no reason why your photographer cannot get this on film. Just make sure you put this on your "must have" photo request list.
In the end, do what you wish. If you think it will mean more to you to see him before that big moment, then by all means go ahead. If you truly want to surprise him, wait that extra 15 minutes.
My friend had her pictures done beforehand and was happy to see her soon to be husband. I was undecided as I didn't want to run around during cocktail hour having photos done, but my fiance wanted to wait to see me. So we are going the "traditional" route and not seeing each other until the ceremony. Either way works.
Enjoy your day!
2007-10-30 16:51:08 · answer #2 · answered by reginachick22 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The tradition of not seeing each other before the wedding goes back to times when marriages were arranged. By not seeing each other until the ceremony they couldnt back out if they saw and disliked their to-be groom or bride. Since things have changed these days and im pretty sure ur not going to back out of ur wedding judging on how ur partner looks it doesnt really matter if u break this tradition at all. Besides, its ur special day - do things the way you would like. It would be terrible if u were disappointed cos u didnt do things the way u would like to just because of some tradition that has no real meaning to either of yoyu.
2007-10-30 16:20:25 · answer #3 · answered by katie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My brother and his wife did this on their wedding and both recommended doing it. They took the gm pics, we took the bm pics, then everyone went inside (pictures were outside) except for the best man and the photographers. She was waiting with the photographers and the best man walked my bro out, covering his eyes until he was standing in front of her.
The pictures of the two of them seeing each other for the first time are so so cute and sweet! They both said they liked that they got to see each other and he got to tell her how beautiful she was without a hundred people staring at them.
If your man wants to do it as well, it's a great way to have a quiet intimate moment between the two of you that you may otherwise not get to have.
One thing though, if you do this, please don't wait in a back together in between the pics and ceremony. It's a little anti-climatic. Take the pics, then give each other kisses goodbye, then go to your separate rooms and wait for the ceremony.
I really think it's a great idea and I think you should do it.
2007-10-31 05:43:02 · answer #4 · answered by iheartbayley 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've never seen this as bad luck or anything.
My husband and I saw each other before the ceremony, because it's our ethnic/religious tradition for family to gather at the parents' home before the wedding for the bride and groom to get a blessing from family members.
Nothing wrong with you seeing him before the ceremony. However, remember that in any pictures you take before the ceremony, you won't be married yet!
2007-10-31 01:18:05 · answer #5 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go ahead, break the tradition. The idea is that you'll only get married once, and you want to have this moment with the person that you're going to spend the rest of your life with. If you don't want anyone else to know, they don't have to. Don't hold back on doing what you want on your wedding day, because you're never going to get another chance to make a promise to this person in a way that's meaningful for both of you!
Traditions are guidelines as far as weddings go: fine if you don't mind them, but they don't have to constrict you from doing what you want. Besides, this moment between the two of you could end up being what you look back on the most fondly.
2007-10-30 19:29:35 · answer #6 · answered by Claire B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I will be seeing my FH before our wedding for ALL our pictures...our wedding is in 11 days in Malibu, in the evening, and we wanted at least some of our pics in daylight....believe me, the look on his face will then show up in pics, which last forever. At first I didn't want to "break" tradition either, but in the long run, i wanted the pic's. a certain way.
Also, remember that the vows and any readings are very emotional too, all your emotions and those of your FH will come out throughout the whole ceremony, regardless of whether he sees you before the actual ceremony or not.
Good Luck!
2007-10-30 16:42:23 · answer #7 · answered by chloe1995 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This decision is realy up to you. It will be the tradition of YOUR wedding .. so .. it's up to you completely.
I always like to see the look in the eyes of the Groom . . and the expression on the Groom's face when he sees his Bride for the first time in her wedding gown. At that time .. just moments befor you say your vows - is the moment of a lifetime .. never to be replaced by any other. This still remains your decision.
The meeting between you .. could be a special secret .. with pictures .. this could be your tradition, made by the 2 of you.
Do what is most important to you.
If you want your wedding to be completely traditional .. then you may have to reconsider.
Just think about .. the first look in his eye, for you .. when you walk down that isle .. will it be a look he already knows?
It is up to you.
CONGRATS !!! ... on your wedding.
2007-10-30 15:28:06 · answer #8 · answered by Tara 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry about breaking the tradition, it's about what you two want. I have had friends who saw each other prior to the ceremony and thought is was the best idea and didn't regret it at all. My husband refused to see me prior to the wedding because he wanted to see me for the first time when I walked up and thats how we wanted to do it. It's about what you want!! Getting some of the pictures out of the way beforehand is helpful too! Congrats and have fun!
2007-10-30 16:13:18 · answer #9 · answered by sun day 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It really depends on how you think your groom will react. You know him better than us.
Will he be disappointed that you broke with tradition? Maybe he's not the type to worry over that? Did you make a fuss about him not seeing any of the wedding gear (Dress, veil, jewelery, makeup, hairstyle, etc)? Will he take it as you have a control issue if you spring it on him before the service?
Just as a side, not all cultures do have that restriction. My husband of 23 years and I actually traveled to the church together. In his tradition, the groom takes the soon to be wife from the parent's home to the service.
2007-10-30 15:20:57 · answer #10 · answered by Barb Outhere 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋