My mother in law, is crazy, for real, she has never liked me, cause she says I act like I am better than they are...Which I do NOT...I just have my ways of doing things, and they differ from thiers. Well we have had fight after fight, cause she favors her other grandson over our two kids. She never visits us, gets the kids crap for holidays and such, and we just bought a house, invited them numerous times to come see our new house, and they finally came after 4 months. My hubby wasnt home, so I sat there for an very awkward 15-20 mins. and talked to them and updated them on the kids and thier activities. Well she just sent me an email stating that she wants nothing to do with us "all". How crazy is that???? And with the holidays coming and my daughters birthday is in two weeks and I invited them, and now they want nothing to do with us...the bad part is I did nothing to any of them.... What is the best way to deal with this? and should I respond to the email or ignore it?
2007-10-30 15:01:51 · 16 answers · asked by luv my gsd 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Your husband MUST be the one to deal with his mother, and immediately!!! Not you.
2007-10-30 15:05:53 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
i think you should let it go. invite who ever you want ot the party of your daughters and who ever comes , comes and whoever doesnt , doesnt. dont turn this into a big thing. You said your in-laws are crazy then this is a good thing keeping them out of your life. your hubby must know that they are weird and crazy so he would probably not mind staying away from them. you dont need to talk to your in-laws anymore if they are treating your kids bad and you bad too. you dont need this. dont respond to the email only if you want trouble. let your hubby handle this. this is his family and he knows how to handle this. have your family come over for your daughters birthday and I bet you she wont even know her grandparents arent even there. kids are into thier birthdays and the big party, they wont even know who is attending unless you bring it up. forget about the negative that your in-laws have to offer and just deal with the positive that your family has to offer. goodl uck.
2007-10-30 15:33:22 · answer #2 · answered by Christina 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is not your fault at all there is something else stirring this up in her to act out this way , the best thing to do is respect that she is your mother in law but dont let it bother you , you can only contorl and fix yourself. So dont try to fix that situation because the situation is HER. Shell ethier come around or she wont. As to the email the best thing to do is just let her know that you are sorry she fells that way.
Its sounds like she may also be trying to get a rise out of you for you to lash back at her , just be sure to always keep it civil
i hope this helps you
good luck
2007-10-30 15:11:06 · answer #3 · answered by Tank 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't ignore it. Things might not be so great....but ignoring it might just make things worse. Try to get to the bottom of the problem. Yeah, you are right, she might have mental issues...but what if it's more than that? What if someone told her about you and your family that isn't true?
It's unlike any typical MIL to write the whole family off, her son, grandkids and all. This is more than just a temper tantrum. Get in touch with her and see what is going on. Stay your respectful regal self, but do try to be patient.
2007-10-30 15:11:18 · answer #4 · answered by Benji's Mommy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would talk to your husband first and come with what to do from there.
I had a similar situation but not quite to the extreme.
What I did was ask for a family meeting between my spouse and their parents, which didn't happen because they refused so I cut all ties to them personally but left the door open for them to have the children visit and call them through my spouse only. My life is much more peaceful without them in it.
2007-10-30 19:25:54 · answer #5 · answered by LC 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
See, you forget the woman is crazy. You can not make sense out of crazy. Also, I would like to bring to your attention that she is not in your life, crazy and drama is not part of your holidays. She buys your kids crap oh well toss it. I What is wrong with you? Why do you insist on having drama and crazy in your life on a regular basis. Many dil would do anything to be told that by there mother in law. They can't get rid of them. Yours is out of the way. I would not beg her to be around I would be jumping for joy so Enjoy life,
Thank God, Don't try to make sense out of it. Be happy with your husband and child leave his mother where you found her.
2007-10-31 09:49:17 · answer #6 · answered by Kat G 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would you want to be around such an awful woman? I'd just say good riddance, and write her off. You don't want the crazy rubbing off on your family.
Besides, we haven't spoken to my MIL in a year, and the kids don't really care. If things change in the future, I'm open , but I'm not going to cry over our loss.
2007-10-30 15:08:27 · answer #7 · answered by Outta Control 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would respond and tell her that I am really sorry that she feels that way. She is always welcome to come and visit and that you hope someday she feels differently. I do have one question though, what brought all of this on (something had to have happened) and where was your husband throughout this whole thing? If they are feeling like this about you, then maybe that's something you should also address and let them know how you feel about it, and when they reply... then you should really look at it and the situation, you may not realize that you may be giving out the wrong vibes.
2007-10-30 15:07:30 · answer #8 · answered by BluePassion 4 · 2⤊ 2⤋
How is your husband handling this rejection from his mother? I'm sure that the remainder of his family don't feel the same way! Talk it over with your husband, how to deal with this, but to give up on family is terrible. Even though she is a terrible person to you and your family.
2007-10-30 15:20:32 · answer #9 · answered by Cindybear 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ignore it , be the better person,they will always be your husbands family and look at the bright side at least you don't have to put up with a overbearing mother in law
2007-10-30 16:32:51 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is not your place to deal with this. First rule of marriage: anything to do with the inlaws, hubby takes care of; anything to do with your family, you take care of.
You need to completely stay out of this, no matter how much your in laws may try to drag you into it, stay out .... completely out. Throw up your hands, defend yourself, back away. Give the perinent information to your husband and leave it there.
Taking care of his family is his business. You trying to clean up this mess will just cause more problems.
2007-10-30 15:11:03 · answer #11 · answered by tracy 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋