he has decided that sex b4 marriage is wrong. Well not just decided but he has always thought this because he was brought up a Catholic but at the moment he feels sex is stopping him from having a closer relationship with God. This is something i can understand, because the bible teaches sex with someone who is not your spouse is a sin, but i always felt as long as we are in a loving relationship this is ok, but i think i now see we shouldnt have sex. This is not really a problem. The problem is that he believes that wanking is also a sin. This is something i have always felt strongly about but i think he believes this because the Catholic church teaches that every sexual act shld be open to life (as the sperm shld be given the chance to make a baby, i.e it is sort of murder to ****) not sure if this is exactly what the church teaches but im sure someone will help me out. How can i be a Christian now i have had sex b4 marriage and how can i get him to understand wanking isnt wrong?
2007-10-30 09:15:36 · 29 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
ok so the sperm arent alive but they are to create life which is why it is wrong.
2007-10-30 09:20:42 · update #1
if ur just going to say its werid why not tell me why its weird? and i love him so i am not going to find someone else, obviously i will stand by him and support him, the only reason i want to changer his views is because it is something i have always felt strongly about (well since i found out about masturbation anyway) i know it is too late but the main point was he wants a closer relationship with God and feels sex is stopping him from doing this
2007-10-30 09:24:32 · update #2
If you love him and he feels that sex is keeping him from having a close relationship with God, then you have no other choice than to stop having sex, and that includes "wanking." If you try to push him into adopting your view on it, you are going to make him feel that he has to choose between you and God and you will lose. Even if he chooses you, you'll lose.
2007-10-30 10:17:30 · answer #1 · answered by sparki777 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can be a Christian even after sinning. By accepting Jesus as your savior, your sins are forgiven. That feeling you both are having about sex before marriage being wrong? That's a change developing in you because of the Holy Spirit. It's after we're saved that we're called to start trying to be more like Jesus, and the Holy Spirit helps us with that. Everyone has sinned even after being saved, because we cannot keep the whole law. Otherwise if we could, there would be no need for Jesus' sacrifice. But sinning does not nullify your salvation! Just have a repentant heart (want to not sin) and if you feel you've sinned (doesn't matter the sin), pray about it to God.
As for masturbation being a sin, no where in the Bible does it say either way, whether the act is or isn't. But Jesus does say that lust is the same as adultery, so if one lusts while doing it, for someone other than their spouse, then they are sinning.
2007-10-30 09:27:13 · answer #2 · answered by Thomas The Servant 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Its very difficult to make someone see something when they were brought up to see the exact opposite.
When it comes to religious views there isn't much anyone can do or say to make your boyfriend change his views.
Being a Christian isn't about what you do right or wrong. You see what you have done and if you are willing to make the changes you want to and refrain from sex until marriage then thats totally up to you. Dont think that because you have done one thing against what the bible teaches you cannot be who you want to be.
For a non religious person like myself, sex is a vital part of any relationship, no only hte physical act but the intimacy of the two people. People say that sex is better when in a loving relationship.
From what i can see you have the brains to managed an adult relationship and be sensible about the decisions you make in life.
2007-10-30 09:22:19 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sex should be something special between two people. My boyfriend and I have been together for over 2 years now, and have been sexually active also. We agree that as Christians it is not what God wants us to do, but it is a strong way that we show our love to each other. The only thing you need to be sure of is that church comes before sex. No skipping out on church for sex. As far as wanking, that's something that all guys do. You can't exactly force him to do it, but it definitely doesn't compare to sex because the sperm doesn't have a chance to even fertilize. Just be careful and keep your heart guarded. Sex should be something that you do after you are sure that you will be with him for the rest of your life.
2007-10-30 09:22:00 · answer #4 · answered by lyssak913 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
By all means stop. But the problem goes much deeper than you can imagine, and this is why premarital sex is a disaster for a loving, life long relationship. You both have a thorn in your heart. It may take years to show up, but it will, and you will have to deal with it. Instead of waiting, find it now and put it on the table. Listen to your intuition carefully.
2007-10-30 10:45:13 · answer #5 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
God forgives sins. If you didn't know this before, then it will be dismissed. You're only human, you're not perfect. Also, if you really love him, you will learn that compromise is the best thing likewise on his part and yours. No one on Yahoo Answers can insist on you. I would go to the church and speak to someone you trust, or go in confinement. And seek counsel on this subject, seeing how this is a big thing in religion which should be a mutual understanding on both of yalls part. Best of luck.
2007-10-30 09:24:20 · answer #6 · answered by Glamorous Unicorn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are repent of your sin. In this case if you are really repent that you had sex before marriage and you stop doing whats wrong and start doing whats good god forgive you. But you really have to be repent. You just mentioned that sperm gives life to a baby so masturbation is prohibited. So if he doesn't want to do that don't try to change his belief. That's when they say avoid temptation.
2007-10-30 09:28:39 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
It sounds like he was very convicted, also he truly loves the lord the way it looks.it is so important to seek Jesus daily to draw close to him.Yes you two heaved sinned but at the same time you both understand that you have. Yes you can become a Christian Jesus loves you ,just ask him to forgive you of all your sins and ask him to be the lord of your life ,JESUS did die on the cross for all of us its just up to us to receive his spirit.You still can have a loving relationship with your boyfriend ,but if you put Jesus first before anything and have a personal relationship with him,Both you and your boy friend will be blessed in more way than you can imagine.GOD BLESS
2007-10-30 09:26:15 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
The Bible says, those who are sexual immoral will not inherit the Kingdom of God.
In other words, NO Sex before Marriage!
2007-10-30 09:23:05 · answer #9 · answered by NJ 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sex before marriage is included among the practices God detests (1Cor. 6:9,10) , but if you read on, it says that the Corinthian christians were ONCE practicers of the aforementioned sins. They changed. So can you, so can anyone.
"Wanking" is not directly mentioned in the Bible, but from Biblical principles one can tell that Jehovah does not approve of it either. It is an unclean practice that cheapens the sexual act to just a sensually gratifying act.
If you require more information (as in Bible verses etc), feel free to email me. (I have the feeling a 'pasting' will not be well taken here.....)
2007-10-30 09:18:35 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 3⤋