Is it wrong for my friend to be ashamed of her husband's psoriasis? Anyone know of a good med. to try ?

Question

He does absolutely nothing to try & get rid of it. He has been given several diff. medicines for it, but they don't know what might work, because he puts it on for 2 days & then quits if he doesn't see immediate results. Is it wrong for her to ask him to wear long sleeves whenever they go out together ?

Answer 1

I've had psoriasis since 2001, and I cover up the worst of it (on my legs - mostly below the knees - and my elbows and up) just to avoid the stares and constant explanations.

I, too, avoid prescription meds. I used prescription creams and ointments for about a year with no visible difference, and long-term use can lead to some nasty side effects. I tried a couple oral meds, but quit because of side effects. Tar products, including shampoos and skin creams, etc. make me sick to my stomach. I won't try the biological injectables because, currently, for me, the potential side effects (ruin your liver, for one!) are worse than the skin problem they MIGHT take care of ... for maybe a few months, then you have to do them all over again when the psoriasis breaks out again. Usually, if a med has side effects, I'll get them ... and sometimes come up with ones that are not even listed! ie. I developed severe sleep apnea after just a couple days of taking Cyclosporin. Thank God, it went away when I stopped taking the pills. Most meds do take weeks or months to show any results, and there is no cure.

I tried UV light treatments. That was a disaster! I wasn't believed when I told them how sensitive my skin is, and in the fourth week of treatment, they upped the time too long and baked me into a "crispy critter!" I just escaped being hospitalized for burns (total body!), and had a major flare as a result of the skin injury. It took months to recover.

Eventually, I had a natural remission (I wasn't taking any meds) and the psoriasis contained itself to the areas below my knees to the tips of my toes (not the soles of my feet, thank you, God!), and to my elbows and immediately above. I'm so grateful to have it on such as small portion of my body! If I ever have a complete remission, it will be icing on the cake!

Psoriais is usually worse in winter, and various things can make it flare up. For me, getting too hot will do it in a hurry, so I can't dance or exercise much ... and heaven help me if I work up a sweat. I have to stay in air-conditioned vehicles or buildings in the summer. Ironic, because a little sun (vitamin D) is good for psoriasis! Stress can cause flares. If one get sick, one is more likely to have a flare. And flares can take months to go away. When I flare, my psoriasis spreads up my legs, sometimes as high as my waist, sprinkled on my back and chest, and down my arms and hands. Oh, the misery!

I use a variety of herbal/alternative and over-the-counter bath products (dead sea salts, etc.) skin creams and body lotions, just to make my skin feel a little better. They can help ease the tightness and dryness, but nothing, prescription or over the counter, has eased the itch. To get an idea of what psoriasis feels like, take your worst case of poison ivy (or chiggers, mosquito bites, etc.) and top it off with your very worst sunburn. It itches like the dickens, but hurts to scratch. I resist scratching for as long as I can, but eventually I just HAVE to scratch, and will often scratch until I'm bleeding. I scratch until the hurt is worse than the itch. And, yes, we shed skin like crazy. You can find me by following the trail of skin flakes! I wouldn't dare commit a crime, my DNA would be all over the place!

The public needs to be educated. Psoriasis is not caused by poor personal hygiene; it is not contagious. More research needs to be done to find the cause and a cure. There is a genetic component to the disease, and what triggers it is still to be determined.

As for your friend, she can ASK her hubby to wear long sleeves when they go out, but if people's reactions don't bother him, and he doesn't care enough about her feelings to spare her their stares, etc. ... she's stuck with it and will just have to know that his appearance is beyond her control, hold her head up and ignore the ignorant public.

Answer 2

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Answer 3

I developed psoriasis last year during a particularly stressful time of my life. I still get little flare-ups every now and then (particularly scalp flaking). But, I was able to control it with the help and advice of my physician.

The prescription medicines for psoriasis usually contain a solution of clobetasol propianate. This is a very strong synthetic corticosteroid that is suspended in ointments and a foam for use on the scalp. It's fairly effective, but very expensive. The ointments also tend to be sticky, which makes use on the hands a bit problematic.

Another effective topical ointment is simply petroleum jelly. This keeps the skin moist in the affected areas, especially if applied after showering or soaking the area first.

Another remedy is psoriasis shampoo with salicylic acid. Salicylic acid is an exfoliant and it can help remove the excess skin cell growth that is the characterization of psoriasis (with psoriasis, the skin cells regenerate every 2 or 3 days, instead of the normal 28 days).

One thing that was a turning point for me, however, was spending a week in Maui last year. My wife and I went out in the water each day, and I think the combination of the relaxation, strong sunlight, and salt water had a profound impact on the psoriasis. Since that week, I have not had any of the skin problems I endured for almost a year and the scalp conditions are very minimal.

Regarding whether it's wrong for the woman to be ashamed of her husband's psoriasis, I agree with a previous poster: she promised to support him in sickness and in health. She should be there to support him, not be ashamed at the fact that her husband has an affliction that affects millions of Americans across the country.

Answer 4

I had a 13 year history of psoriasis, though I was in good health otherwise. But these severe large, thick and scaly excoriated plaques on my neck, ears, trunk and limbs ruined the way I was leading my life. I would be with red, inflamed itchy skin for most part of the year and these silvery scales would seem to be erupting without any reason. To make matters worse, blisters would appear over already red and itching skin. It was living hell.

I was treated with various options but nothing seemed to be working. Some of the treatments that I underwent in this depressing period of 13 years included tar preparation, tropical steroids and anthralin. I was also given light therapy many times but everything I tried would give me temporary relief.

And soon, after a few days I would be plagued with the situation again. In one of those moments when I was completely lost I stumbled upon this website just by chance. I read it and felt that as if someone had put the story my life on this web page. I was thoroughly convinced that if ANYONE can cure me of condition, it would be you.

And was I right, or what. I started recovering within 3 days of starting this treatment. Something that had become a painful part of me for 13 years was actually getting healed! My ears are healed and my neck is smooth again!. I am a month into the treatment and I have never felt better in my life!

Psoriasis Revolution?

Answer 5

They both need to grow up and move on. The Ex needs to let go and the wife needs to deal with it. She knew what she was getting into when she met him, if she could not handle it then, she needs to move on now! My husband and I have been together for 11 years and he has no kids with anyone else, however I am friends with his ex girlfriends. I choose to be the better and bigger person by putting the past behind me. Your friend needs to do the same. The ex is going to be a part of all of thier lives, like it or not. She has kids with the man and has a right to be in the picture. Your friend needs to put her feelings aside, no matter how awful the ex can be. She needs to be the bigger person and no stoop as low as the ex. Maybe your friend should think about asking the ex for coffee and the two women need to sit down as adults and relize they too are a part of each other's lives. They need to be good role models for the kids as well. Myabe the husband is sick of the fighting!!

Answer 6

You know my husband is the same way. He does get lots of attacks and he only uses creams every once in a while... He refuses to drink any meds.
The sun/tanning helps. UV Rays helps. At least for my husband, and taking baths with Epson salt works...

I've never really told him what to wear. I still love him no matter what...

Answer 7

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Answer 8

It's not wrong of her to request that, especially if they're going to be around a lot of other people. Many won't understand it's a condition and they may think he's dirty or has a contagious disease.

Answer 9

if he is not ashamed of it, I can see no reason for her to be ashamed of it. it's the foolish woman that does not support her husband in sickness and in health.

Answer 10

no, it's only natural for her to be embarrassed! i had a friend with it and it's gross, they shed skin everywhere!