I have been thinking about it lately, and to me it seems I have.
My mother has been hitting me ever since I can remember. When I was 12 I got a bad mark at school, and she bashed my head against the wall, then hit me with her feet in my belly (i was on the fround because of the head wound). She gave me a black eye or a slpit lip from time to time.
My father beat me with the belt when I was 5, but other than that he was pretty absent from home. (he was away for long periods of time due to his job).
Mother has been constantly telling me I am stupid and ugly. I was so afraid of her that I once burst into hysterical crying at school because I could not solve a problem and I knew she would beat me when I get home.
They have me food and from time to time they bought me second hand clothes. I never had an allowance in my life, I have started working since I was 14.
Sexually, they have told me that sex is bad and that I am a whore if I sleep with a man.
2007-10-30 05:48:11 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
They did some good sutff from time to time, so I cant say they were bad all the time. But I do think that this is not the way to treat your only child.
Furthermore, they never gave me money to go to international conferences or scholarships (I usually only have to pay for transportation).
And no, they are not poor, not at all,
2007-10-30 05:49:51 · update #1
When I say money, I mean I had no money to buy food for myself or water. If I was at school, I went and drink water from the lady's rooms. I have almost fainted from time to time because I had no money to buy food.
And yes, I am very serious!
2007-10-30 05:55:20 · update #2
I am 25, and moving out.
2007-10-30 05:56:41 · update #3
dellet2 - I am not complaining, I just want to make sure that other people agreed to the fact that I have been abused.
Anyway, mom was abused as well as a child, my grandfather broke one of her tooth by beating her, but she thinks there is nothing wrong with that. And she loves him a lot!
2007-10-30 05:59:26 · update #4
Wow, hon, you were abused. You can email me privately if you want and I'll tell you how I overcame it. God luck either way. Seek counseling.
2007-10-30 05:51:33 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Omg.. Thats So Sad.. Yeah It Does Sound Like Your Were Abused And That Is Definately No Way To Treat A Child And These Days If That Was Happening To A Child The Parents Would Be Arrested And The Child Would Be Put In Care.
2007-10-30 12:53:19 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Best you realized it sooner than later. It's normal to be popped on the butt as a form of discipline but what your parents are doing is way outa line. My mom only hit me in the rear from time to time because I was a bad child to discourage me from doing dumb things, pretty much to protect me. Your parents are sick in the head, you should be praised for your achievements and helped with your failures. Get some help somewhere please. Let me tell you the secret to life. It's not where you end up but the road you take and the experiences and knowledge you gain on the way there. You've come to a fork in your life to make a change for the better. Do you want to be happy? Or treated like an unwanted animal that's nothing but a nuisance? Good things await.
2007-10-30 12:58:51 · answer #3 · answered by chinamuu 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I guess I forgive you for not knowing the difference since you were born into this madness. You had a mother who also grew up in the same disfunction. It's time to begin to climb out of their pit and start working on a better future for yourself. You have a lot of healing to do. Dont let anyone hit you or make you feel bad about yourself from now on. But you will have to work on expressing your anger in safe ways. Maybe taking up martial arts will help. You will feel more rage the more you heal because all those things will come out and you will have to face the injustice of it all. I kind of know what that's like. I was only spanked and insulted. The worst part was when I had to face the fact that I was not allowed to feel my feelings or be myself. Later on, when I was in an abusive relationship, I just layed down and covered my head instead of enforcing my boundaries and speaking out against injustice. It comes with a price because you have to be able to cut out of your life people that don't respect you and cause you harm.
2007-10-30 13:18:51 · answer #4 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't know how old you are. If you are under 18, you really need to talk to a teacher at school. Just tell him or her some of the details of what has been happening at home.
Please tell someone, if not for you (although you WAY deserve better than that) for any younger siblings you may have.
I am sure that I am not alone here when I say that I am going to pray for you AND the rest of the family.
I've been through this many years ago myself and finally I had to leave my house when my dad was ready to hit me with a strap (at age 16!!) No, I am not stupid. We trust our parents and when they violate our trust we become seriously damaged.
We can heal, but the abuse MUST STOP FIRST.
Silent prayer....
2007-10-30 13:08:43 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would have to say yes. Seems to me you were not only physically abused but emotionally as well. How you were treated is certainly now how a parent should treat their children...you are not an animal but a human being just like them. I am so sorry you have had to endure this kind of suffering.
How are you doing now? Are you still in the same situation?
2007-10-30 12:53:33 · answer #6 · answered by JD 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes, what you've described are both physical and emotional abuse.
Yes, your parents learned this behavior from their parents -- that's where people pick this stuff up. Many people are compelled to reenact what they experienced when children.
After you get out (the sooner the better), you should consider counseling, or finding a self-help group for adult victims of child abuse. The people there can help you work through your experiences and how they've effected you, so they don't mess you up for your whole life.
2007-10-30 14:26:11 · answer #7 · answered by tehabwa 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The physical violence and the insults definitely are abuse. The fear of a beating for not answering a question is definitely abuse as well.
Even abusive parents can be nice at times. My father and step-mother were very emotionally abusive, but seemed nice at times.
I would suggest that you talk to a therapist. Abuse of any kind is difficult at best to deal with on your own.
Take care,
Troy
2007-10-30 12:56:25 · answer #8 · answered by tiuliucci 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
So what if you were?
Get a life. Those days are over and can't be changed. Just know that it was wrong and make a promise to yourself to stop it here and now. Make sure you do not treat your children in the same way. Remember how it made you feel and make sure it does not continue. We are supposed to learn from our past and if we do that, we will insure that it will not happen again.
Good luck.
2007-10-30 12:57:26 · answer #9 · answered by dellet2 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
you shouldnt listen to them, everyone in the world has sex and yes i think you were abused as a child ! if i was you, i would tell someone like a friend or relative so that you can get it sorted but i am thinking that because your dad was away from home a lot, your mum might have abused you to get over the upset of it !
2007-10-30 12:57:01 · answer #10 · answered by Azzo 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
oh my goodness, don't tell me you're so dense that you think bashing a childs head against the wall ISN'T abuse. of course it is.
But just so you know, don't whine about having to work since you were 14, not having an allowance, and getting used clothing, because all those things apply to me and I wasn't abused at all. Also, hittig your child with a belt isn't abuse either as long as it didn't get out of hand, it's just another form of spanking. your mother however, she did physically abuse you.
2007-10-30 12:51:52 · answer #11 · answered by Me 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋