When I first met my husband, my in-laws were wonderful. You couldn't ask for nicer people. They welcomed me with open arms and I always felt like they cared about me. Well, I got pregnant with our daughter (a year ago) and still, they were wonderful. Well, once I gave birth, things started to change. My mother-in-law became back-biting, mean, and just downright unbearable. It's so hard to explain how her moods swing. I think she's "obsessed" with my daughter. She makes lots of unacceptable and inappropriate comments, but just acts as if she's joking. It's scary sometimes. She's usually fine around my husband, but when she gets me alone, she doesn't hold back. She talks down to my poor father-in-law and he just sits there and takes it. I've discussed this with my man, and he's wonderful about supporting me and has even talked with her, but still it's all at the point where I don't want to see her anymore. They live a half mile away. Now what?
2007-10-27 13:54:57 · 7 answers · asked by MetalMama 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I can't move away! They moved here from NY to be with us and to see the baby grow up. Also, my husband has a great career and moving really isn't an option. Good thought but it won't help! I think it's also running away from my issues with her.
I have confronted her, which just makes things worse. When I just ignore the comments/attitude, it eats me alive inside. What to do?
2007-10-27 14:11:45 · update #1
Couldn't imagine peeing in her tea! Well, I could imagine it, but don't think I could do it. That's so funny!
2007-10-27 14:20:32 · update #2
From a mother-in-law's point of view, I had a wonderful mother-in-law, & wanted to be the same for my son's wife. Is it possible she's jealous that you are now the main woman in her son's life? You have a lovely new baby, a life she'll never have again, & most of all, you're the wicked witch that took her little boy. It might be best to be unavailable to see her much for a while, be civil, but stand your ground, let her know in as nonconfrontational a way as possible that she's being hurtful & to keep her remarks to herself. Try to avoid saying or doing anything that will make this hard to repair later, there have been some misunderstandings between d.-in-law & I, but we've always settled things that we both love the same guy & the same kids. That's reason enough to get along, even if it means biting your tounge & ignoring her.
Do try to keep a sort of peace, you may need one another someday & as the saying goes, 'least said, soonest mended.'
2007-10-27 17:18:15 · answer #1 · answered by okie's back 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is good that your husband understands and has talked to her. Now it is your turn. When she is nasty just tell her that you do not know why she thinks that she can treat you like that but she cannot. Tell her that you are no longer taking her hateful comments and she either learns to be nice or she can stay at home. Stick to your word. When she sees that you mean it she will quit. My mother in law did. Now she just does it behind my back. I would avoid being a lone with her.
2007-10-27 21:45:48 · answer #2 · answered by kim h 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can see how hurtful it is. Ask your husband to talk to her and tell her to be kind to you, he's her son, and you're his wife, and his wife is first. He must put a stop on her, and stand on his 2 feet before her. That's at the cost of you happy wedding. And you need this. If he's got a problem with that, then take him to a psychologist and you and have with "him or her" help solve that sort of problem. She don't know where her place is, someone has to tell her. He should be able to do so if he's a man. Think of ""Raymond and Mother""".
2007-10-27 21:33:43 · answer #3 · answered by kayneriend 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We don't have kids but my MIL was overbearing and controlling and all the typical things that you hear about. My husband started setting limits and almost punishing her if she broke them. We wouldn't see them as often if she treated me the way that he didn't want her too. When she complained about him and asked me if I really minded, I would just tell her "He's just protective of me." After a while she started following the "rules" because she didn't want him to be mad at her and because she wanted to see us more often. She didn't blame me for it because she thought it was all him.
Now I actually like my MIL and she likes me a lot too. We would not have a good relationship if my husband had not stepped in the way he did. Those boundaries make a world of difference.
2007-10-28 09:14:47 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yoooO tell her to stoP immeidately and if she is always up your *** and you cant move away just dont see her anymore tell her your busy and sit down and talk to her and ask her why she is like this ?? also tell her if she does keep on acting like this you dont want to see her anymore ..... its probably best !
2007-10-27 21:25:14 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Move away.
2007-10-27 20:58:17 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
i pee'd in my ex mother in laws tea water
i had a good laugh when she said her tetley tea was a little 'tangy'
eff you you old hag
2007-10-27 20:58:08 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 5⤋