My sister and my brother in law are the only ones in my family who dont approve of my fiance and I to get married.
When we told them they completly made ME feel like **** and embarressed that crap outta me in front of my fiance. He had my back the hole time. But there wasnt any need for this.
She tries to control everything and manipulates me all the time.It's like once I realize she's doing this I realize I fell into her trap. Now I let things cool off. I make the day for my wedding ceremony and I speak with her today and she jumps down my throat b/c I didnt let her know about the date?!
As far as I was concerned she told me she didnt approve, and I thought she wasnt coming. Now she's trying to get me to have my wedding closer to her so it's convient for her and my family who lives out there. I'm so angry and I had it with her and my family treating me this way. I honestly want to just have me and my fiance. So I wont have to feel all agravated on our day
2007-10-27 10:56:07 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I seriously think she'd be the one to object to us getting married during the ceremony.
2007-10-27 10:56:42 · update #1
I just feel if it were just him and I there I wouldnt feel so worried. So now I'm having second thoughts about everything and just having it him and I..
It'll be more special to me.
2007-10-27 10:58:42 · update #2
You could just elope. It would be unfair to some of your family to just have his family and friends there. It would be much cheaper of course for it to just be the two of you but I would invite family if I could tolerate it. And if you are worried about her objecting you can have that line removed from the ceremony. At least one wedding I've heard of had that line omitted because they were sure someone would object.
2007-10-27 11:05:04 · answer #1 · answered by indydst8 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This day should be as special as he is to you.. I would recommend maybe having a gathering in your home. You can call the court and have someone come to your house to perform the ceremony for less than $50 dollars. Then you can decorate your patio or backyard with beautiful lights and flowers and your choice of music and drink all you want. Have some fun and don't let anyone get in your way, they can only make you stronger. Good luck and remember whatever you decide will be with you forever.
Well I hope you make the right decision for you and your family.
2007-10-27 18:23:37 · answer #2 · answered by Mid 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I have a very similar situation with my father and step-mother.
Ask another family member to speak to your sister. They should make it clear to her that you obviously want her to be at your wedding because she's your sister and you love her and you will always look back with regret if she doesn't come. However, they need to tell her that if she does come, she needs to put aside any doubts she has about your fiance, trust your judgement and be there for you as a sister.
She has to make the decision to either support you because she loves you or to stay away because she can't put her feelings aside.
Good luck and don't let anything spoil your day.
2007-10-28 17:51:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I were in that situation, I would go somewhere without all them and get married. It probably will be less stressful to you & your fiance that way. You don't necessarily have to go to Vegas, either. You could go on a cruise (I believe there's a wedding cruise, even, where you get married just before it takes off), or any number of places away from your family. Good Luck.
2007-10-27 20:23:17 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your wedding day is one you will remember forever - and you do NOT need to have anyone there to spoil that! What about planning a spontaneous wedding - just tell the people close to you that you WANT there to come over for a party or something, then surprise! and get married! Don't let anyone ruin your day.
2007-10-27 21:39:59 · answer #5 · answered by Fluff S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When on an Alaskan cruise I met a young woman with a similar problem. She solved it by deciding to get married on the cruise. Later, when the family all settled down and realized that it was THEIR wedding, she and her husband planned to host a celebration party.
It is YOUR special day - go for it however makes YOU most happy.
Congratulations!
2007-10-27 19:16:56 · answer #6 · answered by dddanse 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
we didn't invite heaps of family to our wedding. we invited everyone to our engagement party, and at the engagement party we explained that we were having a very small wedding with just a handful of people.
one of my exboyfriends hadn't met my husband before, so my hubby didn't want to invite him, fair enough. so i j ust told him "look, only people we are both close with are invited, and you and my fiance haven't even met, so no. sorry, you're not invited." he understood but still didn't like it very much.
we got married behind a locked gate at a rainforest. Perhaps you too could choose a secluded location with a nice big gate to keep her out?
I suggest you call her and tell her. "because you are not supportive about our marriage, we don't want you to attend our wedding. I love you and am very hurt that you don't support my choices... but that's the way you've chosen to be."
2007-10-27 18:43:24 · answer #7 · answered by chilly 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
if you really feel that your family will get in your way at the wedding and really feel like getting married with just the two of you then go for it. whatever will make you feel more comfortable and the day more special. just get married away somewhere with just the 2 of you like hawaii or something and you can also start the honeymoon right after.
2007-10-27 18:14:06 · answer #8 · answered by TJ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i know how aggravating that can be. some of my fiance's family think we are to young to get married. but we found that simply telling people that it is going to happen so deal with it has worked quite fine with the problem, and you just have to tell your sister and brother in law that if they aren't willing to be happy at the wedding then you don't want them there. it might suck and yeah tempers will flair but its your special day and thats what it is about, you and your fiance.
2007-10-27 18:11:07 · answer #9 · answered by D 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am in a similar situation. My father is one raciest undeserving man and every time we talk I get mad at him because he never keeps his promises and he's never been there for us. I was afraid to tell him I just got engaged because I was afraid he would invite himself, so I called him and told him about it. He congratulated me and was happy and i thanked him but after he gave me room to breath i told him, "The reason I called to tell you is because I don't want you to be there." I could tell he was upset but I explained to him that I didn't want unresolved issues ruining my day. He was still upset but he understood. I also told him we may never resolve anything but it would be a start of something. Hope that helps.
2007-10-27 21:38:33 · answer #10 · answered by Nehm . 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋