My husband's Grandma is about to pass away. They live a little over 5 hours away. We have a 15 month old and I don't know what to do. I don't want to be disrespectful and not go to the funeral at all. My son barely made the 3 hour trip to go camping over the summer. Even if I were to go with my husband over to his family, should a 15 month old even go to a funeral? I wouldn't feel comfortable leaving him with anyone over there to watch him...everyone that I do know will be at the funeral. So do I just stay home or still go or what? I feel so bad that his grandma isn't going to be around much longer and I don't want to make things harder on anyone if I don't go. We've been married for about a year and a half now. we've been together for over 4 1/2 years. My son is still nursing from me at night and in the morning and he's teething right now so he wakes up crying a few times a night. My husband is visiting her in the hospital right now.
2007-10-27 09:31:41 · 10 answers · asked by JumpingBean 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
I think that it would be disrespectful to bring a crying baby to a funeral. I would let my hubby go without me. I would hope that you're family would understand the situation. At best you could go with but not go to the funeral or stay outside weather permitting.
2007-10-27 09:38:42 · answer #1 · answered by jingersnaps 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Go ahead and go just stay by a door or hallway. So that if he starts to get loud go ahead and walk out. It is not disrespectfull to walk out with an upset child but is disrespectful to stay. So go and try and make the best of it. If you leave in the evening around bed time the day before it may be better for you guys and the baby. That is what I have always done with my children when they were younger. That way bath and cuddle time were had and they were most likely to fall asleep and I wouldn't be stressed out on the drive cause they were. I frequently have to take eight hour trips with a 10 month old. Good luck.
2007-10-27 09:38:58 · answer #2 · answered by littledueceb 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
i just went through this except my son is a rambunchous 2 and half year old my husband grandma passed away at the end of sept. i let him make that decision remember that it is his family and if he trust someone that he wants to watch your child during the family funeral then let him it wont be long maybe a hour or so . belive me it will be a very emotional day
2007-10-27 17:23:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask your husband if it would be okay to stay home. If he says sure with no hesitation, then stay home with your son. If you have to go, make sure you have plenty of numbing medicine and stay towards the back during the funeral services so you can quietly escape if you need to. The family should understand that your son is teething and it's out of your control. I breastfed too at 15 months and my family understood. Good luck!
2007-10-27 09:36:32 · answer #4 · answered by Precious 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Yes it's hard, but go. My daughter's been to 2 wakes, and my son 1. I always have someone watch them for a couple of minutes and go pay my respects to the family (or friend) and leave. When you do leave, no one will think bad of you because there's a child involved. Sometimes a child can put a smile on a few people's faces which is good during times like these.
2007-10-27 09:49:39 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I would go and sit near the rear of the church. I did that when my son was about two (and going thru the terrible twos). I held him and spoke quietly to him. Sometime during the service the priest said Amen real loudly -- and my son hollered Amen too. Everyone laughed and snickered and for years afterwards, people remarked about how they thought it was "grandpa" speaking through my son. So go, take this little descendent of Grandma and don't worry about it. Grandma would want him there and he is too young to know what is going on.
2007-10-27 09:41:21 · answer #6 · answered by Diane B 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Its family. and seeing as they had a son (your husband) they will understand about your son teething and being fussy. if you dont feel comfortable taking him to the grave site then dont, meet everyone back at the house or where ever they are going afterwards. if your son is having trouble in the car rides give him some distractions, play music, sing, or give him a LITTLE bit of medicine with codeine in it so he'll fall asleep for a bit. and nursing has nothing to do with anything- he's a baby and like i mentioned, they obviously know what that is like. :)
best of luck and sorry for your loss.
2007-10-27 09:39:33 · answer #7 · answered by orange blossom honey 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I would go, and bring your baby along. If you need to leave the service and go outside because he is getting restless or cranky, people will understand.
My father passed away when my oldest was about 15 months, and he was actually quite good at both the service and the laying in. Good luck with your decision.
2007-10-27 09:40:27 · answer #8 · answered by Bekki 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
take your children with you it's a family thing and children are part of the family.Death is part of life, and the people there will like see the baby.also that way later in life you can tell the children that they were there when grandma was laid to rest. this is how family connections are made.
2007-10-27 09:38:50 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Can you leave him with your relatives or a close friend back home? I would absolutely NOT bring him to the funeral. Or, see if a friend or babysitter will accompany you and watch him at his father's home. It's inappropriate for you not to attend the funeral. Pump for him now, that way he has your breast milk at night and in the morning. He'll be fine. I'd strongly advise you to leave him with a friend/relative/sitter.
2007-10-27 10:24:42 · answer #10 · answered by Sit'nTeach'nNanny 7 · 0⤊ 3⤋