I am a new mom, and just wondered at what age do you teach them manners?

Question

Also, what manners do you teach exactly? My daughter is only six months old, but I'm just thinking ahead.

Answer 1

Manners are taught as soon as your child understands what you're saying. Also, children will need coaching and reminders on manners throughout their childhood. It's best to give positive reinforcement, that is, when your child does something right, let them know. When your child does something wrong, do not be negative about it, but gently tell them how it is best done and why.

Besides basic table manners some general basic manners for kids are as follows.

10 Basic Manners for Kids

1. Waiting their turn and not interrupting other people when they are speaking. No one can be heard if there are too many voices at once. Gently tell them to wait until someone is done speaking, and then ask their question. Be sure and give your child your full attention when you are done speaking so as to reinforce their positive behavior of waiting their turn. While your child is patiently waiting, hold their hand or put your arm around them to let them know you are aware of their presence.

2. No name calling. Even if it's in "fun", name calling hurts. Instead of labels, ask your child to explain what the behavior is that bothers them.

3. Always greet someone when they come over to your house. Depending on your level of formality, you can teach your child to shake hands with adults who come over, but it's not necessary to shake hands with other children. But, your child should always say, "hello" or "hi" when someone visits so that the guest feels welcome.

4. Say, "Please" and "Thank you" often. It shows respect and appreciation. In addition, if they are thanked, then say "You're welcome".

5. Clean up after yourself. Whether at home or at a friend's house, always pick up after yourself. It's their mess, so they need to clean it up. If your child does leave a mess, remind them that they need to clean up before the next activity can begin, and stick to it.

6. Good sportsmanship. After playing a game (sports, cards, board game), no matter the outcome, be pleasant. If your child wins, tell them to not gloat or show off, but be kind . If they lose, don’t sulk or get mad, but be a good sport and tell the other child(ren) “good game” or speak well of them.

7. Take compliments courteously. If someone praises your children, teach them to be gracious and say, “thank you”, and avoid putting themselves down or pointing out flaws.

8. Opening doors for others. When going into buildings, allow elders to go first and open the door for them. When preceding others into a building, don’t let the door slam in the face of those behind, but hold the door until the person behind can grab it. Also teach your children that if someone holds the door for them, then remember to say “thank you”.

9. Exiting/Entering etiquette. Elevators: allow those in the elevator to exit first before entering the elevator. Same with buildings or rooms - if someone is exiting the building or room through the same door you are entering, let them exit first.

10. Respect differences. When people do things differently from your family because of diversity in culture, race, or religion, then teach your child respect. Point out how interesting it is or how different families do different things. Families have their own traditions or rituals and it is important and has meaning for that family.

Answer 2

I have three children--2 of which are teenagers. I taught them manners right from the very beginning(even before they could talk)--starting with please and thank you. All three of my kids are extremely well mannered now and people always compliment them on their manners. It is never too early to teach them, if you incorporate good manners into their every day life they will assume that is just the way things are done. It is also very important your children see you behaving courteously to others so they have a good role model. It seems these days parents are either lazy or just don't care about teaching their children manners. All our friends always comment on how well behaved our children are (these are the same people who have kids in the same age group as mine) and wonder why their kids can't behave civilized in public. These are the same people who think you can start teaching your child manners once they start school. Trust me, it doesn't work that way. I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 3

Congratulations mom!
I imagine by your concern that you have already started teaching your daughter manners. Being a good example is the best lesson. Please and thank you are the easiest manners for small children to understand.
Inside voices, table manners and how to act in public will fall into place as the child gets older. I think you will know when the time is right for each step as it occurs.

Answer 4

hi new mum...well there isn't really a right time or wrong time to begin teaching your child good manners, just remember to always lead by example! Children are taking in everything that you do and especially by one year of age will start to imitate your behaviour! Your little girl will be fine in the manners arena - all you have to do is remember yours!

Answer 5

I think this is something you can probably teach your child starting all the time, at a level that's appropriate for the child. A very small baby can't be expected to remember every single thing, but you can start working with her on her level. At all ages, you should be setting a good example of what you intend the children to do.

Answer 6

You should try teaching them slowly after one year that is when they will start responding.

First thing - Never say No. We always start with a No that should be avoided. Understand the kid first what they like or don't like. When you have to say no divert them to the things they like. Take them out to a mall and talk to them and explain about things and toys we think that is too early but they will start observing and start relating.

Potty training and Table manners etc should be done only at the respective places if you wanting them to be well disciplined

Answer 7

Manners canot be taught in words , it is learnt by following the elders. If want to avoid your child by doing a certain things then dont do those things infront of your child. Your child will always follow you hence stop behaving in the manner which u feel does' nt fall under the category of manners.
Charity begins from home.

Answer 8

Great question, and thinking ahead is a huge advantage in parenting. Start teaching them manners at home, every day, as early as possible. Modeling that behavior is the best way. You set the example, so as she grows, even as a very small toddler, if she sees you saying "please", "thank you", and "you're welcome" to family members at every opportunity she will imitate that. (I still remember thanking my 1-year-old niece for something and being shocked when she said, "doo'wecom." ) I think it's never too early to start modeling that behavior for her. (I am assuming that you already do so, though, so basically you are on the right track.) Good luck!

Answer 9

You should teach them everything as early as possible.

In my opinion, even though she is only six months old, you should already be reading to her and talking to her. Children learn to speak by being spoken to. Children learn to read by being read to. It will develop a desire to read on their own if you read them a story every night.

As part of that interaction with your child, you can explain all the things they need to know in life. Even if they don't understand right away, it seeps in through the ears. You can explain anytime you give your child something - "now when someone gives you something you say "thank you",,," and repeat that over and over again.... explain that they should always be nice and polite....

The more interaction with your child, the better off they will be.

Answer 10

Miss Manners' once quipped "It's never to early to start torturing Baby." But seriously, if you want courtesy and proprietry to be second nature to your offspring you couldn't have a better resource than Miss Manners' Guide to Rearing Perfect Children. http://www.amazon.com/Despairing-Bewildered-Panic-Stricken-Parent-Advice-Etiquette/dp/0883658380

This book is not only super useful, it's also fun to read and funny. It will dispell any ideas you have about manners being dull or manners mavens being humorless old prunes. Miss Manners will really tickle your funny bone.