Daughter is 15, her brother is 22 and her older sister is 20. We all walk on eggshells around this 15 year old. She refuses to help out around the house or follow simples rules.
2007-10-11 16:12:01 · 8 answers · asked by niceladyla1500 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
She knows she rules the coup, you need to nip it in the bud. If she can't act decently to you and her siblings, then she can't go out, talk on phone, get on computer. Ground her from music, school activites,etc.
At one time my son, who is now 23, was grounded from everything except the bathroom, sleeping, eating and school. He dug his own hole---when I'd ground him from one thing, he'd smart off at me and I just kept adding to the list. This went on for months. Now he is very respectful and thinks back about how he acted (way back then, to him) and laughs about the extremes I had to go to in order to get him to act respectfully to his family. It wasn't so funny at the time and was torture for me. Because he was with me all the time, I never got a break from his attitude. I told him I'll be more grateful than him when he is ungrounded because he was driving me crazy.
2007-10-11 17:13:13 · answer #1 · answered by ladyliberty 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think the occasional well-placed slap can work wonders. You may wish to avail yourself of the counselors at her school... get some advice from professionals that are probably dealing with hundreds of these.
Withdrawing posessions and privileges for not doing her chores or following rules would also prove useful. Take away her cell phone and make her use the phone out in the hallway until she straightens out. Take away her X-Box if she won't do her chores. Take away her computer and internet access until she apologizes.
Ground her until she straightens up.
Make sure she understands that her behavior comes with a price... why you are doing what you are doing. Recruit the older kids to keep an eye on her.
She will claim that she is abused... truth is that under the law, you are only required to feed her, provide a place to sleep, and some clothes so she can go to school... everything else is pure privilege.
Basically, she is trying to push the envelope to see how far she gets with it... you need to establish supremacy and rule your household. Being a parent is more important than being friends with your kids. The mama reigns supreme... if the mama isn't happy, then NOBODY is happy. Step into your power.
By getting this wild-child under control and have her toe the line, you are really doing her a favor. Nobody will hire a nasty little diva.
2007-10-11 17:16:06 · answer #2 · answered by revsuzanne 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are the parent. You are walking on eggshells in your own house? How did this happen? Does she have any privileges? She should not. She cannot refuse to help our or to follow simple rules. If she does refuse nothing should be done for her. Do not wash her clothes, Fix her any meals or anything. She should not be allowed to play sports or engage in any other activity. She should not be allowed to have friends over or to leave. She should not be allowed to date or talk on the phone. She should not be allowed to be on the computer or to watch tv. Really she should only be allowed to go to school and to do homework. She should be told what is expected of her and that she will do it and stick to your guns. You have allowed her to take over. You need to take the control back.
2007-10-11 18:31:39 · answer #3 · answered by kim h 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who's the parent? The reason all of you are walking around on eggshells is because you need to be the PARENT. Right now she's in control and only because you let her.
She either follows the rules and helps out or there are no privileges . . .i.e. going out, being driven around, etc., etc. If she does stupid things like runs away . . . call the police. She WILL go to a therapist if you make it contingent on other things.
By not taking control, you are not being fair to your other children.
2007-10-11 17:10:30 · answer #4 · answered by Skully 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Here's a very effective strategy: Do not set out a plate for her at dinnertime. Tell her that unless she acts like a family member she will not be fed like one. To make this work, do not set out any leftovers in the fridge or any snacks she can survive on. Also make sure that TV, music, and computers are turned off.
If this fails, I highly recommend family therapy.
2007-10-11 17:01:40 · answer #5 · answered by The Eternal Squire 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Boot camp
2007-10-11 16:19:15 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
you can 't really. she's a teenager and they all go through that stage. they can't help it. i have a 14 year old and it's the same way. i just have to be careful about what i say around her.
2007-10-11 16:17:27 · answer #7 · answered by popstar4493 1 · 0⤊ 3⤋
that's how i used to be. plz PLZ plz take her to a pscryatrist and therapist. It may help her even out her feelings
2007-10-11 16:17:14 · answer #8 · answered by smileyface2015 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋