22m, depressed and lonely?

Question

I have a real problem. I am so lonely and depressed that it almost physically hurts. Despite everyone I know telling me how funny I am, I have no friends. I haven't had a date in over a year and a half, and I've never had a girlfriend. I feel like my social development is so far behind everyone else in my age group that I will NEVER meet a woman. Is it even possible for my life to get any better, or should I just join the Seminary and get it over with?

Answer 1

I think that you need to set some small goals for yourself. First, make it a point to get out and go somewhere that you feel "a little uncomfortable". Then push the limits a little more and go up and talk to a woman the next time, not one you think is attractive...just one that looks approachable and tell yourself you are just going to chat. That will get your confidence up a bit. Then next time set a goal to go up and chat with someone you think you might really like to get to know. You know what I mean? Set yourself goals that are easy to achieve. The ones mentioned here maybe too much for you...or you may have already surpassed these goals, but "you" know where you are getting stuck, so take small steps until you get to where you want to be.

Think to yourself that my goal is to have a date by such and such month, etc. I hope this helps. If you are feeling really, really depressed though, you might talk to a professional about it. I would try making the small goals first though, because I really think you can do it if you try. Good luck to you and hope this helps.

Answer 2

I know exactly how you feel and where you are.

I was very socially weird and could never talk to people unless I already knew them, which prevented me from meeting people.

I became very lonely, depressed and truly felt I would live my life alone forever and die alone. And then I found e-harmony ....


Sigh... if only.


This will be easier said then done, but it worked for me and I have never been happier. Do what you love, whatever it is, and socialize it. Get out into the crowd and meet people, take chances, do the unexpected, talk to the pretty girl, put yourself out there.

This may sound "ask Amy" but you can always join a local group that meets and talks about things you enjoy, a book club or anything else.

Basically just put yourself out there in social situations, you can only improve. Don't act desperate or like you don't have a clue what your doing, just do it.


Enough rambling, but it is NEVER to late, EVER. Just don't give up, something great will come your way and change your life :)

Answer 3

I have to presume (from the layout you have presented), you are a teenager. If this be so, you have the rampant hormonal ragings which is normal at this time. Leaving you often in a state of confusion. You also become introverted as a protective mechanism. Is why you have so much trouble talking to your folks.. they never understand, right? Although they all went thru the same thing in their transitional years. Interject independence raising its necessary influence into the picture and you can get a pretty good idea of the consternation that is presently being experienced. What to do about it!! It becomes important that you accept the maturity factor which is trying to impose itself into your life and then, talk to your folks like an adult. Rather than a complaining child. And be sure and not use the phrase, "you just don't understand"..... they do if you are able to express yourself so they can understand what you are meaning.

Answer 4

U no I had a Guy ask me once. Had
I evr bn in a CROWDED room, yet I
felt I was all alone? NO, I said that`s IMPOSSIBLE! but a few yr`s latr, I experienced that feeling. In the midst
of FAMILY that I had not sn in 15 yr`s.
U know what I did, I got a life, and the
first thing i did was CHANGED my ENVIRONMENT, I had no frnd`s, but
I do now. I still don`t have a Man in my
life, but I CONTINUE to look, and I`m kicking around the thot of going bk to COLLEGE. I had no life! That`s what
was MISSING. So look at ur life guy,
and if u find THING`S, r ppl in it that
u dnt nd,then SWITCH them with POSITIVETITY!!!! I really feel that u
may go into the SEMINARY, and
REGRET IT. Try life out here one
more tm, thn if this tm next yr u stl fl
the same way, then began to WEIGH
ur option`s abt the SEMINARY. There
had to b something SIGNIFICANT that happened in ur life to make u fl this way.
I do hope thng`s wrk out 4 u gy! GL!
I`m Out
Passion

Answer 5

If you want friends, then you need to get out there in the world and talk to people. Sounds simple, but you got to be a friend in order to have friends.

As for dating, you are a little vague, so I cannot give you any specific advice other than try going to double your dating and sign up for the free dating advice newsletter.

Answer 6

The seminary doesn't want depressed guys who can't get laid.

Move out of your mom's house and get a motorcycle. The rest will fall into place.

Answer 7

I'm sorry you're having such a hard time. Perhaps the first step is to have yourself evaluated by a psychologist or psychiatrist to make sure that there isn't something about your mental health that's preventing you from taking steps to improve your social life.

Answer 8

Maybe you should try counseling about why your depressed and lonely. Have you tried online chatting? That might be good for starters or opening a myspace account. Good Luck.: )

Answer 9

you have my respect man but you know what go out meet people guys ,girls then you will meet a girl and if you like her and you are sure what you want "ask for help" thats step 2 ok.

Answer 10

MOVE ON GUY!!!! If you keep on thinking about it, you will never change and will be sindle for ever.. mannnn, you're just 22 yrs old for f**k sake mate........ Go out, hang out and change the way you're thinking..... All the best!!!!