My son is a skater and grew his hair pretty long and bushy over the past 2 years. He decided to get it cut, it looks different, kinda like drake bells, maybe longer. anyway we are eating dinner last night and my husband just comes out and tells my son matter of factly, "I dont like your haircut". You could tell it hurt my son's feelings (he's almost 13) I usually tell people I dont like it if there is something wrong with it,(cut crooked or something) not just because it is my opinion. I just thought it was rude and wondered if you would tell him bluntly you hate his hair or if you would keep your opinion to yourself!?
2007-10-11 03:35:29 · 14 answers · asked by kaytee3212 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Well 13 is a tuff age because the hormones are still raging. Your husband should have kept his opinion to himself. Maybe you husband just isn't use to his hair cut because it was long for 2 years. Still he shouldn't have said anything. My son grew his hair out for 1 1/2 years and i just cut it but i thought it looked so much better because i could see his face. If i didn't like it though i would not tell him because he is 12 and he is at the age where his emotions are raging and his feelings get hurt very easily. I would definately keep my opinion to myself because i don't want to see my son upset.
2007-10-11 03:47:29 · answer #1 · answered by spleefarella 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It was a little rude, but I believe that a parent has a right to express his opinion about his child's choice in style. Do they have a good relationship otherwise? Was he mean about it or did he say it rather matter-of-factly? As long as he's not forcing him to change, I think its fine. You should feel comfortable expressing your opinions with family. Its a good way for your son to learn that not everyone is going to like his style. Life is full of hurt feelings and disappointments and you won't always be there to protect him. Use this as a way to teach him how to deal with those hurts.
2007-10-11 10:49:17 · answer #2 · answered by pitterpat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dads!!! Can't live with them...can't shoot 'em!! LOLOL
Both my father and I suffer from bluntness! it is a normal male trait. Talk to your son, and reassure him his father loves him. Explain that Dads sometimes have a lot on their minds, and tend to just get to the meat and potatoes of the matter, instead of being diplomatic and sensative!! I'm sure his father didn't mean to hurt his feelings, He was just stating his opinion matter-of-factly!
Talk with your husband. Remind him that he was a teen once, and probably wore clothes or did stuff that urcked his father. All boys do!!
Ask him to talk with your son and try to soften the bluntness in the future!
2007-10-11 10:44:29 · answer #3 · answered by Rawstuff 007 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As a parent, I think we have the right to let our kids know when we don't like something whether it's a hair cut or a shirt or whatever...... however, we also need to do it tactfully...... maybe softening the blow, but that is a mom's opinion...... if your a dad, you don't soften anything, you tell it like it is.... at least your son knows where he stands with his dad and his hair............. and his dad has a right to his opinion.
I'll give you an example......... I'm a red head, as a red head, we have blond eye lashes, so we look horrible..... my dad used to say, go put your face on , your too ugly to sit at my table without your make up on. yes, rude, but it got the point across..........
2007-10-11 10:52:48 · answer #4 · answered by bizzymom38 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband should have not mentioned it to him, and just tell you about it. He can tell you that he doesn't like it, that way the kid doesn't get hurt, or he should have just kept it to himself, and accept change. He didn't like his hair cut, imagine when he gets older, and a real big issue comes up, how will your husband handle it? He'll probably go nuts.....
2007-10-11 12:19:31 · answer #5 · answered by mindseye06 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He should keep his opinion to himself...your son is at an age that could hurt his choices and how he feels for the rest of his life...your husband needs to not be so rude...talk to him...obviously he has no sympathy
2007-10-11 10:39:56 · answer #6 · answered by *Going nowhere much too fast...* 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It all depends on what is said. Does his dad constantly put him down. Does he talk negative all the time? So its a matter of how often this occurs. Abusers usually accuse kids of stuff alot too.
2007-10-11 10:41:35 · answer #7 · answered by theroadwetake 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd tell. So what? Not everyone likes everything. He doesn't like the kid's hair. My brother got a really stupid heaircut one time and I told him in no uncertain terms it was absurd looking. We laugh about that now.
2007-10-11 10:42:56 · answer #8 · answered by melouofs 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think if you do not like your kids hair you should be able to express yourself honestly. After all being honest to your kids teaches them to be honest too. Also if you do not think the cut is appropriate to your standards of style they should know that you are just expressing your sense of style. I feel you should let your child know that you do love them even, if you do not appreciate their sense of style.
2007-10-11 10:42:49 · answer #9 · answered by Patricia M 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That was very rude. I would keep my opinion to myself. It's hard enough for a 13 year old as it is and it was not necessary to hurt him like that.
2007-10-11 10:42:54 · answer #10 · answered by catfan 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋