ive got 2 boys now aged 12 and 10.and i dont no why but just lately they have been very bad.they have.stolen,been throwing eggs,stolen again,bunking off school,and being in places they shouldnt!!the thing is,is that they know right from wrong,and they have never done this sort of thing before.and i cant handle the lies! they never tell me the truth.untill i have the police knocking on my door! all what i have said above has happened in 2 days! and im so annoyed and angry! i have smacked both my kids before and i dont like it...but sometimes being a parent is hard enough without things like this happening! i smacked my kids with the shoe twice and took there phones away! what else am i meant to do? and yes i do talk to them all the time but clearly its not working!!
2007-10-11
01:12:16
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19 answers
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asked by
Anonymous
in
Pregnancy & Parenting
➔ Parenting
i should of started what along time ago? if you mean smacking ? then why ? like i said they have never done anything like this before! so why would i smack them for nothing ?
2007-10-11
01:29:11 ·
update #1
2 bottom answers.DO NOT tell me that im a bad parent and that i do not watch my kids! they are with me all the time,this has only happened once! and it wont be happening again! and my kids have phones for obvious reasons!
2007-10-11
07:51:35 ·
update #2
whacky lady,ive put what they have done!
2007-10-12
00:11:24 ·
update #3
I believe smacking should be used onyl as a last resort.
If a child just plain refuses to behave and parent has tried everything, no harm will come from a smack. Im not saying it should be a regular thing. Smacking has only been necessary for me at most once a year. My children know who is in control and they dont push that far anymore. They know what is expected of them.
Taking away the right to smack is like giving the children all the control.
Plus, i was smacked as a child, and i have grew up pretty normal, with no horrible side affects or damage that people say u may have from smacking. Its rubbish.
2007-10-11 01:27:03
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answer #1
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answered by Anonymous
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Ask them what they plan to do in the future. In 6 years and 8 years they will be adults. Do they have any particular jobs in mind? Will they need qualifications to stand any chance of getting them? Favourite activities that cost money? Do they realise that nobody will ever employ them if they are known locally as thieves? Getting themselves into serious trouble now can effectively ruin their whole lives, and they need to realise that yes, you are upset, but the people they are hurting most are themselves and it will be long term, if not permanent damage.
You do need to try to figure out where this is coming from. You could try asking the school - have they just recently changed who they hang out with? Something has triggered this if it is literally only the last 2 days. Or see if the police will give you any more details of who else is involved - try to get yourself a reputation as a parent who wants to put things right.
You also need to ground them for the foreseeable future. A 10 and 12 year old who are stealing are simply not ready to be out without an adult, and you could get into serious trouble yourself. If at all possible, you should take them right into school, and pick them up from the gates in the afternoon.
2007-10-11 01:43:57
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answer #2
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answered by Anonymous
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This is not a matter of all of a sudden. You lost control over these boys a long time ago and simply did not realize it.
1~~"smacking" is not discipline.
2~~why would a 10 yr old and a 12 yr old have cell phones to take away?
3~~You smacked them with a shoe? You are just as out of control as they are.
Get help, take parenting classes before it is too late!
2007-10-11 03:13:29
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answer #3
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answered by Rebecca W 7
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It's probably too late to start spanking them good now, but you need to have a long talk with them and see what's going on. Are they hanging out with new friends? Put a stop to that first, if they are. Seek outside help if necessary, but most of all make your presence known to them at all times. Follow the little stinkers if you have to, but don't just assume that they know right from wrong and will be good kids. Peer pressure at this age is their biggest influence. Go Gestapo (as my son used to say) on them if you have to, but find out why they are misbehaving!
2007-10-11 01:28:29
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answer #4
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answered by EvilWoman0913 7
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Holy Cow? My kids are 8 and 10 years old and I've never had that problem. Yes, I spank my kids and stand them in the corner and take games and TV away.
I also make them do chores etc. I don't do all at once, just pick one at the time of punishment.
Why were they throwing eggs? Don't you know what your children are doing? I know where mine are at all times and what they are doing. It take a little responsibility of the parent to keep the kids in line.
2007-10-11 04:19:53
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answer #5
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answered by trying to please 4
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You shouldn't smack with objects----they are too big to get a swat on the bum so you need to go to the core. Take a way something that hurts. A phone taking a way isn't obviously working, try something else.
2007-10-11 02:05:39
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answer #6
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answered by Yummy♥Mummy 6
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I have swatted her on her tush a couple times and yes it hurts a parent to have to resort to something like that. But honestly, sometimes it's the only thing that will get through to them. I only do it when all else has failed and I feel like nothing else is working. It still hurts though. That old saying "This hurts me more than it hurts you" is so true!
2007-10-11 01:25:29
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answer #7
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answered by Amanda 7
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a youthful baby has a similar psychological potential to a canines. they have not got any theory-approximately suitable and incorrect and telling them that something became ambitious potential not something to them. it truly is something that desires to income to them. a rapid slap does that completely. As for Psymon who thinks it truly is bullying. permit me placed this situation forward. a youthful baby is approximately to place their hand on a warm range. to stop them you have 3 recommendations. a million: Ask them quietly and with none rigidity to not try this. 2: Shout at them and tell them to not that. 3: provide them a slap and tell them under no circumstances to try this. selection a million will effect interior the youngster touching the range as their isn't any sense of urgency conveyed. selection 2 and 3 will the two attain scuffling with the youngster from doing so yet shouting is basically as lots a factor of "bullying" as a slap (it relatively is designed to ask your self not harm). the place I used to artwork I continuously had little toerags coming in and giving me a trouble. they did not care in case you stated as their mothers and dads or stated as the guards as a results of fact they under no circumstances have been given punished. Why appreciate somebody once you know finished nicely that the only effect of your strikes would be a well mannered chatting with. at last I had sufficient of them. This lad became sixteen and continuously harassing me (on the time i became a 20 year previous lady working on my own). sooner or later he got here and started trashing the area so I walked over to him and he rapidly suggested "Oh you touch me and that i will call the guards. you would be carried out for assaulting a minor". I grabbed him by potential of the scruff of the neck and forcibly threw him out of the save and advised him to not come back. He under no circumstances dared to come back returned and under no circumstances shouted abuse at me returned as a results of fact I knew he does not tolerate it. the reason babies are becoming to be such disrespectful little scumbags recently is as a results of fact they are actually not being taught appreciate and think of they could ruin out with it. a quick slap while they have been youthful might have prevented maximum of that.
2016-10-22 00:39:06
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answer #8
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answered by Anonymous
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I never had any but when I was growing up, I was spanked
whenever I did something very wrong.
Nowadays they try to tell you, don't do that, it's bad, which
is a crock. I have a friend who never disciplined hers and
he has turned into a juvenile delinquent. Very sad.
Edit- For the thumbs down, you do not know what he has
done so a little discipline doesn't hurt. Whew.
Good Luck Shelley!
2007-10-11 01:21:42
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answer #9
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answered by Wacky Lady 00 3
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Well, I don't think fear is the same as discipline. It's more of a quick fix to create the illusion that the child knows right from wrong, when he in fact doesn't. How have they been disciplined in the past? Those things start from toddlerhood - you need to be consistent, or they'll never learn.
2007-10-11 02:18:01
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answer #10
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answered by SoBox 7
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