My girlfriend and I want to get married, I am catholic and she has no religion background.?

Question

She wants to be married in a church but has no chirch background but wants to learn. What is her, and our best option because she does not want a christian wedding or know a lot about religion in general.

Answer 1

Your best option is to be married in the Catholic Church. The Catholic Church allows marriage between Catholics and non-Catholics.

Before or after the wedding, if she is interested in joining or just learning more about the Catholic Church, have her contact your local parish and ask about information about their RCIA Inquiry group.

She can go and ask any questions she might have.

This is the first step in RCIA (Rite of Christian Initiation of Adults) but she can stop at any time.

There is no obligation to become a Catholic.

With love and prayers in Christ.

Answer 2

Oh this is what's confusing she wants a church wedding but not a christian wedding, so here goes the advice. (catholic to catholic)
Enroll her in RCIA classes, they are going on right now. There isn't any pressure for her to join the church but she will get lots of good information about what it entails to be Catholic, and since that is her husband to bes religion she will gain a good working knowledge of where you are coming from religiously. You can still be married in the church if she's not Catholic, you may have to have a little extra marriage counceling but that's do able.
If she insists that she doesn't want a christian wedding please reconcider getting married in a church, it's kind of a slap in the face to be married in a house of God but not to have a religious wedding.
Your best option if you are going to have a "nonchristian" wedding is to pick a lovely place, some outdoor venue, or a beautiful hotel, or a lovely historic home and have the wedding there, it can be officiated by a justice of the peace or a nondenominational minister.
Honestly for your sake and the sake of the children, try to get her to take some RCIA classes just so she had the basics of your religion. Go with her, make it a relationship building experience you never know what may come of it.

Answer 3

I think the first and most important consideration here is how important is Catholicism to you?

If you are practicing Catholic and do not marry in a Catholic Church, this can hurt your faith. I know that in my area, if your marriage is not blessed in a Catholic Church, you are no longer able to take Communion. I have heard of Priests giving people a hard time over this.

I'm not saying it's right or wrong... just that you need to consider that fact. Marriage is a Sacrament to Catholics and not to be taken lightly.

If you do not practice the Catholic faith, you could find a different church to belong to together. There are many religions that are a lot more liberal.

But being married in a Church is and should be a religios thing. You are in the house of God.. and there is nothing wrong with that.

Good luck to you and I hope you come to a decision that you BOTH can be happy with.

I married a Catholic who is of the mindset that Catholicism is the ONLY "right" religion. I was not raised in any particular religion, so I was happy to learn Catholicism and have a household that follows one faith. (Here's hoping that my liberal thinking won't collide with that! LOL)

Answer 4

Well your Priest is not going to be happy because he will be sure you will either change churches or stop going to church at all. If she wants 'to learn' does she want to be catholic like you if so no problem, the Priest will set her up with classes and she can be catholic.....if she has never been married in a church before......
If she doesn't want a "christian wedding" why does she want to be married in as church....
There are many non denominational churches that the Pastors will let you write you own vows if that is what she means by 'not a christian wedding' You just ask around until you find one that will allow this....It is very common for us non catholics to write our own vows, I did and it was a beautiful and touching ceremony. My sisters "turned" catholic to be married in the husbands Church because we were not raised with a strong church background, one is celebrating >45 years and her hubby has never gone to church with her...(go figure) my other sister went regularly with her husband until he died and left her with 4 kidz to raise, she is now new age... The only "civil ceremony" I know of is the Justice of the Peace or a Judge or Ship captain, and none of these are done in a church. There is always Las Vegas and a "Wedding Chapel"

Answer 5

As a good Catholic girl (whose BF is an Independent Baptist, of all things!) I can truly understand your situation. And we are both of deep faith.

Are you absolutely positive this is THE girl for you? I'm not sure - because either you're having difficulty communicating your situation or there are some SERIOUS red flags out there.

Red Flag! OK she wants to be married in a church - but doesn't want a Christian wedding?

Red Flag! She doesn't want to know a lot about religion in general - but wants to be married in a church AND doesn't want a Christian wedding?

These two concerns alone can cause some really deep rifts - trust me - in your marriage in a really short time. How will you two raise your children? How will you celebrate traditional holidays? etc. etc. etc.

I suggest you as a couple speak with your priest and enroll in some pre-marital classes. Most parishes offer them to prospective bridal couples and I recommend it. If she balks at attending - then that should also be a Red Flag, too.

Now bride doesn't necessarily have to convert to Catholicism, but she does need to learn about and at least understand your beliefs enough to respect them.

I would definitely re-think this whole marriage thing with this girl - I'm sure she's a truly genuinely loving woman - but unless you can resolve these basic red flags - you'll not be happy.

Answer 6

Unfortunately there will be a slight problem...since she's not affiliated with a church and you are... being married in church is going to be difficult. Especially since your catholic and she's not religious. My hubby is a christian and I am not. We were married outside in a gazebo because I didn't want a church wedding. You have other alternatives IE: non-denominational justice of the peace, las vegas has great options, outside wedding with a JOP. Just a little FYI...Weve been married for all most 10 years,and our faiths have NEVER caused us any problems... so if your willing to compromise... Then don't let religion stand in the way of your happiness. I wish you much joy on your journey.

Answer 7

You could always seek out a Non-Denominational wedding chapel and have the ceremony conducted there. There are many Non-Denominational Ministers like myself out there that can construct a ceremony for you and your fiance that will satisfy both backgrounds. I marry interfaith couples all the time, and sometimes it is a delicate line so as not to offend any family, but it can be done.
Another option is if you have your heart set on the church recognizing your marriage, you could always remarry in the church down the line should she decide to become Catholic.
I am performing a ceremony for a couple who is doing just that. Their priest advised them that as long as their marriage licence was signed only by a notary or a JP (not a minister) they could do that. Fortunately for them, I am a notary too :0)
Best Wishes to you.

Answer 8

I understand the situation your in but I'm on the opposite side of the spectrum. The guy I care deeply about is a white catholic whereas I'm an Arab Muslim. I never asked him to convert but he brought it up, saying that he will do whatever it takes for us to be together. However I will tell you the same thing i told him. "Only convert if you truly believe in Islam" what's the point of converting and calling yourself a "Muslim" if you don't believe in the values and beliefs behind the religion. So my advice to you is to study the religion, study it deeply, ask questions, and compare catholicism with Islam and see the comparisons and differences. DON'T convert for her, but do convert if you believe in the religion from your heart. Let her guide you through it but don't do it for her. So study it and see what the truth of Islam is and if it seems to be something you believe in, then go for it. Believe me you won't regret your decision. As for the parents thing and the different race, that one is pretty hard. I know what your girl means cause my family is pretty traditional with marrying an arab only. However- If you truly believe in Islam and believe in each other and you are a true Muslim who practices the religion then at the end... no one can turn that down. Islam accepts people from all backgrounds and cultures, therefore the families should too. If god can accept you, then who are the families not to? And I always tell my parents that too lol. I know that if this guy that I'm with converts because he sincerely believes in the religion and proves to me that he did it from the heart of Islam rather than me... then my parents can't interfer with the color of the skin. So don't worry about that for now- just worry about Islam and if the converting works out, then Allah (god) will make it easy on the both of you. But remember- if you're going to convert, it has to come from the heart. Do it for Islam-not for her. If you do it for her- it will come crashing in the future. Cause if doesn't come from the heart then there is a good chance it will fade away. I wish you the best of luck, look into the religion and you won't regret it. Don't let the media and the ignorance in todays society effect your decision, seek the truth of the religion and hopefully everything will work out between the two of you. It's hard-I'm not going to lie, but good things don't come easily right? :) And believe me you're not the only one out there! It's tough, it really is but everything happens for a reason!

Answer 9

well first off you said she does want to get married in a church.... any wedding in a church is going to be christian based...... if you are a practicing catholic and it is important to you than you should get her to start attending services with you and help her to just learn a little bit more about christianity... you could always have an outdoor wedding if the 'church thing' doesn't work for her.... but if it is important to you, you really need to express it to her..... you don't want your wedding day to be something you regret

Answer 10

i think that you two need to sit down and discuss what kind of ceremony that you want. If you both want a church wedding there are many churches that you don't have to be a member of that would be willing to allow there church to be the place for your wedding. Just make sure that you both discuss what you want in the wedding and then just check around to different churches in your area to see if they would be willing to let you use there church.