I have feelings for a married man.what do i do..........?

Question

Well I have a friend who is married but is not happy with his marriage. His wife has cheated on him with several of his own friends and even her own customers and coworkers at her job. He still loves her fcourse but hes tired of her. He has had a crush on me since 10th grade and he is always trying to get with me but I reject him cuz hes married with a daughter not because I dont like him. I mean I really like him too but the problem is he doesnt think I have feelings for him at all. He is oblivious to the fact thatI do really like him. I had just started to have feelings for him and one side of me is telling me to keep it to myself and forget everything and another side is telling me to let him know. Should he know how I feel? Or should I just not ever say anything at all???

Answer 1

Do the right thing. As long as he remains married keep your feelings and hands to yourself. Trust me, you don't want to get in the middle of that mess. You also don't want to hurt an innocent child. And believe me, the child would be hurt no matter what because the truth always comes out. Good luck, I know you are in a tough spot, but hang in there and do the right thing...it's the best thing in the long run.

Answer 2

You need to give this some thought from your head and not your heart...that's not easy to do, but you must do it. Remember that you are only hearing his side of the story. His wife might have a few things to say about him, too, no matter how great you think he is. You are not in their house living with them to know such things. On top of that, he is choosing to be married to her despite all of these supposed problems. If he has been complaining about her every time you see him, you may want to help him make a decision by saying something like, "if you don't like it, why are you there? It seems pretty simple to me. You must like what she does, or you would leave, right?" He will probably say something about not wanting to hurt his daughter, because that's what married men often use as an excuse to stay in a bad marriage. When he does, I would respond, "Oh please, you're not going to use THAT excuse, are you? Then why aren't you and your wife in marriage counseling? I would think if you cared about your daughter so much, you would be in counseling and working at the marriage or trying to figure out how you can function as a family if a divorce were to take place."

Bottom line is, this is THEIR marriage...you don't belong in it. It is their problem to solve. If he were to have an affair with you, it would only hurt his marriage more, and it would more than likely break your heart in the end. Get out of his business, girl, whether you are attracted to him or not. A lot of married men use the tool of complaining about their wife or trashing their wife's character to have an affair with another woman...because women are so nurturing, and they know that is their weakness. Wise up!

Answer 3

I would leave this guy alone. He is already taken. No matter what he tells you about his marriage and his wife--stay away. He may just be saying he's unhappy and she's having affairs as his own justification to be with you.

It is So not worth it. Been there, done that.
Do you really want to create this much drama and conflict in your life? When HE needs to spend time with his wife and not you, are you willing to just say ok and let it go? Or do you want him to devote all his time to you.

For now, I would not say ANYTHING. The chances are if you tell him--he will take this as an open invitation to have an affair with you. Or, you can tell him that you like him, but you would NEVER date a married man.

Imagine yourself married--and your husband has decided to fool around with an old friend. How would you feel?

I was with a married guy for 3 years. His wife found out about me and hmmmm, got harrassing phone calls at 2 am, my tires sliced. I was really afraid that this woman was going to hurt me.

Move on, find someone who is available...HE IS NOT

Answer 4

Well, the problem is being emotional, this can blind you and get you into a lot of trouble.

He already knows you like him that why he keeps asking you to be with him, he's jsut waiting for the breaking point, when you give in.

Question: if his wife is cheating with everyone why hasn't he moved out and left his wife alone, the divorce process is along one or sometimes not but he needs to let his wife go.

And he is no good either because he's married and still trying to be with you. So if you two get together, what would stop him from finding something wrong with you and doing the same to you.

Answer 5

Leave it alone, and don't spend time with him. Stay away from him.

My Mom dated a married man for about 10 years, and although he always said he was unhappy, he never left his wife, and my Mom gave up many good years of her life and is now completely burned out on relationships. I don't know of any happily ever after stories for women who date married men. The passion is addictive, but the heartbreak is awful. Its like being in an abusive relationship. Holidays, birthdays, weddings, family events....all these things will be heartbreaking if you have an affair with a married man.

Go find a man who is willing to prove you are his whole world by actually being there for you. There is someone wonderful out there just for you....you just need to look in the right places.

Answer 6

so shes cheating on him and hes hitting on you. Do you think your the only one hes hitting on? Run the other way or you will end up the other woman. These guys dont leave their wives, they just like to play around and have some one to complain to about the wife. Then they go home and sleep with the wife. If you want to be a second hand dress and break up a marriage then tell him how you feel. Just remember, if he cheats on her, he will cheat on any woman he is with.

Answer 7

As a man who has been in the very situation, please understand that no matter how good of a game he speaks, it will always be easier to stay with his wife than to leave her and be with you, especially with a daughter in the picture. I am sure that he has feelings for you, but they are not justified by his wife's behavior. It will end up being the worst thing you could do to yourself. And if he were really interested in you (or someone else) and not his wife, he would have already left. I hate to say it, but if he will not leave her after what she has done, he will not leave now. Best of luck!

Answer 8

I would tell him how you feel.. the next time he tries something with you, sit him down and tell him how you feel to get it off your chest. Then its up to him. I woulddnt wait around for him though. Married men rarely leave their wives. But some do and live happily ever after. Just be straight with him. tell him you WILL not lower yourself to cheat with a married man but yes you do have feelings for him. Tell him to think hard about his feelings and what he wants with the rest of his life.
Say that if he decides to leave his wife, you to can go on some dates and see how things go.. if he doesnt leave his wife, tell him to NEVER EVER again try to hook up with you and if he does slap him in the face. Then he is a low good cheating wanker who wont change.
Goodluck!

Answer 9

Stay away from him .. he's married and I'm sure you don't know the whole story. Remember your not just playing with a married man. their is also a married woman and a child with a mother and a father. the only thing the other woman does is bring Hurt to a hurt family. nothing good ever comes out of cheating. think before you bring that kinda KARMA to yourself...

Answer 10

Since you've known him for so long, I think it would be okay to tell him that you like him and would like to date him AFTER HE IS DIVORCED. If he's not able to make a decision about divorce, the "unhappy marriage to a cheating wife" story might be just a story. Don't get involved with this guy while he's still married -- it will bring you nothing but heartache and trouble.