My boyfriend of 4 years (both 21) watches pornos occassionally and the other day we thought we were breaking up for good and he went out and bought a porno with 3 girls fooling around with each other. I got really jealous. Is it normal for guys to watch these things casually when in a relationship, should I be jealous or am I making a big deal of this?
2007-10-10 13:05:44 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
he only does it when I'[m not around to be with him and he fantasizes about me being a twin or kissing another girl which is normal right?
2007-10-10 13:16:01 · update #1
It basically comes down to this: how do YOU feel about it? You feel the way you do. If you are comfortable with your relationship, trust him, and can get past it, then it isn't a big deal. If you DON'T trust him, feel like he is replacing you, or it effects your relationship with him in any negative way, then he should respect your feelings and quit. If you are uncomfortable and he cares about you, he can certainly live without it. If your feelings are that he shouldn't be watching this stuff, and he continues to do it regardless, then maybe you two simply are not made for one another. Honestly, the fact that you almost broke up seems to indicate that you two are not on the same page. I wouldn't feel guilty dumping him if I were you. Follow your heart... AND your brain. Do what you think is right. Ultimately it does not matter one bit what WE think about pornography. Just remember this: you deserve to be treated with respect, either way. Good luck!
2007-10-10 13:12:02 · answer #1 · answered by Mr. Taco 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It could be not a big thing it may mean that he just wants some type of excitement in his life. Maybe if you show him that then whats the point of buying porno.
2007-10-10 20:10:38 · answer #2 · answered by Top Flight 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whether it is normal or wrong is not the issue here. He wants to do it, he does it. I think your reaction of getting jealous is, frankly, odd, but that is you, not me. For me, I would find it distasteful. It would indicate to me that he has sexual desires and fantasies that I could never share, that I would never understand. It would be a deal-breaker for me, because it would indicate he and I have such different attitudes toward intimacy.
2007-10-10 20:13:37 · answer #3 · answered by Caper 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is normal, it's a fantasy, and it doesn't mean that he's cheating on you with someone else. I would talk to him and see if he thinks things are getting dull between the two of you. I'd be more concerned if he became obsessed with it and preferred it to spending real time with you.
2007-10-10 20:46:42 · answer #4 · answered by seadog 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes it is normal for guys (even attached ones) to watch porn. It is silly to be jealous of a DVD or a bunch of pixels on a screen.
2007-10-10 20:10:59 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
you need to relax about the pornos..just remember who he's pleasuring the pornos are on film or on the puter he can't touch them..only you..if it inspires him to watch them then you get to reap the benefits..maybe you should (if you want to) sit down with him and watch one you enjoy and show him how it feel with the shoe being on the other foot..
2007-10-10 20:10:39 · answer #6 · answered by Hard G 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
guys do it, it is not cheating and u should not be jealous it is their way of letting off steam so to speak my guy watches them at first i didn't like it and then i sat down and watched with him they are not that bad it is basically a fantasy thing and he probably just jacks off hey he is at home and not in the streets
2007-10-10 20:12:58 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
yea, you are making a big deal out of it. try watching the movies with him. lots of couples enjoy watching adult movies together.
2007-10-10 20:24:43 · answer #8 · answered by joe 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would ask him why he's looking at porn. Maybe there's a reason why he's looking at it instead of spending time with you. Perhaps if he got rid of the porn you two could reconcile and be happy again.
2007-10-10 20:08:35 · answer #9 · answered by airforcewolf 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋