Why are realationships so hard? need advice!?
I have been with my boyfriend for a year and a half. Latley though we have hit a rough patch. We were seperated for a week and during that week I ended up meeting someone else. The guy I met is 3 years younger than me. He is a really sweet guy and I cant stop thinking about him! He has been understanding about this whole situation. Me and my boyfrind are now back together but I am still talking to the other guy. (but NOTseeing him on the side)When I go to bed thats who i think about, when i wake up thats who i think about, during the day thats who I think about! It's driving me NUTS!!!
I have to keep reminding myself that me and the other guy would more than likley NEVER work out, so why do i keep thinking about him? Why do i find myself wishing i was at his house instead of my BF? Why would I rather be in his arms? What to do what to do? I'm driving myself crazy!!!! Any advice would be appreciated.
2007-10-10 10:48:36 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
There are things about the younger guy that i wouldn't want in my life, he has two kids and does some dumb stuff cuz he thinks it's cool
2007-10-10 11:03:41 · update #1
You need to decide if this new guy is worth losing your 3 year relationship for. If it is then break up with your boyfriend and go for it.
2007-10-10 10:54:25 · answer #1 · answered by littleone 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The other guy is really not the issue. You and your relationship with your BF is the real issue.
It sounds like you really need to take some more time to think this through. It's not fair to you or your BF to be only halfway in a relationship. If you are thinking so much about the other guy, then something is wrong between you and your BF. I don't mean that you are wrong or he is wrong or the relationship is wrong - just that perhaps you are not ready to be exclusive right now. Something is going on.
I would advise you to take a time out. If you are meant to be with your BF, then you will miss him and get back together. If is meant to be with someone else - perhaps not the other guy, but someone down the road - then it will happen that way. But you are cheating on your BF emotionally and that's not healthy for either of you.
2007-10-10 17:57:53 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have you heard of grass being greener on the other side of the fence. You are intrigued with this new guy which is completely normal. You are seeing him at his best since you have met so briefly. But this should be a wake up call for you. You sound young, if you have any doubts at all you should be playing the field. Why did you break up? And why did you get back together so quickly. Sometimes 2 people think they are in love because they are comfortable together. There is a perfect guy out there for you, don't cut yourself short. The divorce rate is so high, so don't jump back with someone unless you cannot live without him... especially if there are no children involved.
2007-10-10 17:57:38 · answer #3 · answered by cat 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you have just grown out of your boyfriend. It's not a bad thing, but why pretend you are still in love with him, when you are not? If your boyfriend had met another girl and has replaced his thoughts about you with her, wouldn't you want to know? Talk to him and say you need a break. Who knows if you've really got a future with this new guy, just take a month to be by yourself. Don't date anyone else or pursue a relationship with the new guy, just try to figure out what's going on with you. Maybe you'll realize you've made a mistake and you really do love your boyfriend, maybe not. Only time will tell.
Good luck!
2007-10-10 17:56:05 · answer #4 · answered by angiemedic56 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If this is what you want, then break up with your current boyfriend and be with this guy! Do you really think if your boyfriend was constantly thinking about another girl while he was with you that you would be fine with it!? Do him a favor and break up with him if you are unhappy. It isn't fair for the other person.
It doesnt sound like you are ready for a relationship with this guy again. You need to learn to control yourself if you are ever going to be in a steady relationship. There is a thing called a "honeymoon" phase. The first few months of a relationship you are constantly thinking about that person, but later on it is just going to be the same thing as with any other person.
2007-10-10 17:52:53 · answer #5 · answered by Mike G 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok. well i was in a very similar situation. but in mine i ended up dumping my boyfriend to date the new guy. and i thought he was the best thing ever.... cuz it was so fresh and new.... and the sparks are still bright when everything is new!!! well me and the "new" guy dated and things were great. i really really liked him. but i could definitely see the difference between like and love with him. and after things werent new anymore i realized that was what i was searching for. that newness. but i had to understand that every relationship has its rough spots you just have to make it through them. i wish i would have never broken up with my boyfriend of 2 years for the "new guy" but i think i learned a lot from it at the same time. now me and my old boyfriend are on our way to repairing our relationship and i couldnt be any happier!!!
i hope things work out.
2007-10-10 17:54:14 · answer #6 · answered by Smilllllleeeee 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me that you feel something new. Or something you have not felt in a while. Everyone goes through hard times in relationships, if you did not, then you would really have problems, it is normal for that kind of stuff to happen.
I was with someone for over a year. We had problems, and something very similar happened, but I made the mistake of letting the temporary emotions take a hold of me, and I broke up with her, I have regretted it every day since. The feeling of new is nice, and can be very intoxicating, but it does not last forever
2007-10-10 17:55:43 · answer #7 · answered by darktexan2000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ur feeling this way because there's something that the other guy gives u that ur bf doesnt give u...u have to figure it out on ur own what it is, because no one else can tell u that...and when u find out what it is, then just test them (in ur mind) with which one u would be better off, and then u can still decide on whether u wan to be with ur bf or the other guy...but also remember that if u take too long figuring this whole situation out it may be too late if u choose the other guy, because he might not wait for u...and (hopefully not) falls in love with someone else..good luck
2007-10-10 17:54:43 · answer #8 · answered by Erika-Zola 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am in a very similar situation. I don't know the solution, but I think I know why we are in this predicament. We don't want to cut ties with boyfriend because we feel secure in that relationship. You said it would more than likely NEVER work out with the other guy, which is kinda how I feel too. But if you KNEW it would work out with that guy, would you break up with your boyfriend for him? I think we are both scared to take a risk and have a little faith. Good luck!
2007-10-10 17:53:53 · answer #9 · answered by elaine 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well this isnt a hard one to me your not feeling your boyfriend as much as that other guy break up with your boyfriend stop convincing your self you and the other dude wont work out because who knows yall can be lovers 4 life try something with the other boy and if you 2 go out and your happy then be happy.
2007-10-10 17:55:51 · answer #10 · answered by hunniebunnsweetz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋